Let me start off by saying that I am under another screen name because some family members know my real screen name and I don't want them to know about this!
Here's the background - we dated for 7 years and I was sure we would get married. One day he tells me he can't marry me because he is not sure if there is anyone else out there for him. We decided to 'take a break'. I thought we would get back together eventually and he found someone right away (I think she was waiting in the wings for awhile).
A year after we broke up he calls me asking to see me. Like a fool I agree thinking maybe there is some chance we could patch things up. No. He just wanted me to spend the night. Hurt, and still in love with him, I did.
He called me every few months to 'get together'. One day, I get an idea to plug his name into a registry and sure enough I find out he is getting married! He never told me! I confronted him with this and he admitted it but tells me nothing has to change. We can secretly meet 'forever'.
In the meantime, I met my FH but was still getting called by the EX. I told that him I was with someone and that he is crazy and I would never be unfaithful to anyone the way that he is to his wife! He continued to call - even the night before his wedding! Even after his wife was pregnant! Even after his baby girl was born! Still asking me to meet him!
I know I should tell him off but I just tell him no and wish him the best b/c I think there is something really wrong with him!
My FH knows all of this and of course he wants to call his wife and then call his mother to tell her what kind of a son she raised. I can't let him do this b/c despite everything I don't wish him a bit of harm.
I had to vent to you girls. It is a sensitive topic and there is not many people I can tell. The whole thing drives me crazy! I fear that he will never be out of my life and will continue to think that one day I will crack - but I would never!
Thanks for listening. It feels good getting it all out!
CubanBride
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Re: My ex called OMG - long
In my opinion, if you are still receiving his calls, then you want to talk to him. If you didn't then you wouldn't put up with it.
I still talk to my ex once in a while, via email. He has asked me for my phone number a few times and I told him no. It's better that way. This way if he writes anything niappropriate to me I am just not answer his email. But he never does.
But I only talk to him because I want to. I was in love with him for 7 years. Now we are just friendly. You need to stop talking to him. PERIOD!!! He has no respect for your boundaries and no respect for you. Cut him out of your life right now.
12-3Princess
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Member since
Re: My ex called OMG - long
oooh this is just not a good situation. I honestly think that you need to put this person in the past. I know 7 years is a long time but you are getting married, and if you want that to last a lot longer, I think you should have respect for your husband and NOT talk to your ex that calls you for SEX (I think that is what you mean by 'get-together' obviously).
It's just not right that you talk to him. Next time he calls tell him you don't think it's right that he does this, or puts you in this position, that you are changing your number, and that if he attempts to get your new number and calls you, you WILL call his wife.
Honestly, men that have children and cheat on the babies' mothers are the lowest form of scum. JMO. No reason to keep this person in your life.
Spitzergirl
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Member since
Re: My ex called OMG - long
Call his wife, notify her about his behaviour!!!
Then, you get him out of your life--it is simple. He sounds like bad news anyway
Preshy7
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Re: My ex called OMG - long
If you haven't called his wife by now maybe you are afraid to let him out of your life. Maybe just a little piece of you still cares for him. You need to think long and hard about what you want for your future. Its simple to change your number and email address, etc. But it kinda seems you dont want to.
It sounds like this guy could potentially change your current relationship - I think as hard as it is, you need to get him out of your life- permanently.
shamrock12472
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Member since
Re: My ex called OMG - long
You need to tell him to leave you alone!!!! He is going to haunt you for the rest of your life if you let him. I had an ex like that and he thought that he could go and do anything he wanted because I was always there. This went on for a couple of years until, I was finally over him. Stop taking his calls! I thinkyou should tell his wife... she deserves to know what type of man he is and she can then decide what she wants to do about it. This maybe a way for her to find someone that will really love her.
FrescaBride
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Member since
Re: My ex called OMG - long
I think he needs to grow up and commit to the person that he is married. If I were in your shoes, I'd not answer his phone calls. He will eventually get the message that it is over and he will not call you anymore. By speaking with him, you are only reinforcing his immature and irresponsible behavior. I really value loyalty and when I hear things like this, it really makes mad because I'm a woman and I'd not want for this to happen to anyone. I feel for his wife because she probably does not have any idea the jerk that she married. Please do not waste your time talking to someone who doesn't deserve it. And just ignore him. I'm certain he will get the message that you are now happy and have moved on with your life and you don't want to have anything to do with him.
leighdvm
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Member since
Re: My ex called OMG - long
Posted by FrescaBride
I think he needs to grow up and commit to the person that he is married. If I were in your shoes, I'd not answer his phone calls. He will eventually get the message that it is over and he will not call you anymore. By speaking with him, you are only reinforcing his immature and irresponsible behavior. I really value loyalty and when I hear things like this, it really makes mad because I'm a woman and I'd not want for this to happen to anyone. I feel for his wife because she probably does not have any idea the jerk that she married. Please do not waste your time talking to someone who doesn't deserve it. And just ignore him. I'm certain he will get the message that you are now happy and have moved on with your life and you don't want to have anything to do with him.
I agree!! Do NOT answer any more of his calls!!!
ShelliNMando
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Re: My ex called OMG - long
Sorry - time to change your phone number though! All of them!!!
Bunnymonkey
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Re: My ex called OMG - long
Three words: CUT HIM OFF!!!!
Why in the world are you still taking these calls?
bluesashbride
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Re: My ex called OMG - long
you need to never take his calls, and tell him one last time there will be no further contact IMO. i know its a strong standpoint, but besides the fact he is married, etc, it CAN NOT be good in any way for YOUR husband, your relationship, and your future to have this crazy, toxic, ex-love in you life in any way. you have your husband, family and million other friends i'm sure...as hard as it may be, be done with this one relationship for good. don't worry about being nice.
Bebalina
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Re: My ex called OMG - long
wow!! i dunno what to say but I'm glad your FH knows everything!
Katherine121
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Re: My ex called OMG - long
Posted by AlliNMatt06
Why are you even answering his calls? Where is he calling you? If its on your cell phone, don't answer it, or change your number. I agree with the other post, tell him you will call his wife next time he calls you. How does your FH not get mad!!!!!
I have to agree with the above. If you really want him to stop calling, change your number -- all of them. There is no way in hell my FH would continue to put up with an ex continuing to call me. Stop feeling sorry for him. He knows exactly what he's doing.
