My FILs are so insecure!

If I was you, I would speak up...this is your wedding, not theirs...so what if they only have 6 tables, it is not a popularity contest.....

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Posted by stephanief

If I was you, I would speak up...this is your wedding, not theirs...so what if they only have 6 tables, it is not a popularity contest.....

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agreed, especially since it is more money!!!

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Posted by MayBride06

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Posted by stephanief

If I was you, I would speak up...this is your wedding, not theirs...so what if they only have 6 tables, it is not a popularity contest.....

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agreed, especially since it is more money!!!

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double ditto - empty space on tables looks terrible.

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Posted by ChrissynRicky

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Posted by MayBride06

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Posted by stephanief

If I was you, I would speak up...this is your wedding, not theirs...so what if they only have 6 tables, it is not a popularity contest.....

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agreed, especially since it is more money!!!

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double ditto - empty space on tables looks terrible.

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I agree completely!

I would tell them that you paid for x amount of cp's to accomidate x amount of tables....not only that but wouldn't you have to then mix up the small and large tables? you can't have small tables on one side of the room and large ones one the other - can you? This would mean their fam would not be sitting all together.

I would just tell them NO.. the hall says it has to be 12/table! no reason to sped the extra $ on more centerpieces! that is nutty!

ETA: i remember them wanting lots of extra stuff that required more $ too and wanting your dad to pay his part? tell em they already got their extras, no more! pay for your own dang center pieces!

that's rediculous!

we had some tables at our wedding with guests from both sides. Isn’t the whole point of a wedding the union of 2 families?

some people are bizzare

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Posted by glinda_goodwitch

My parents had 3 full tables at our wedding, out of 11. It's fine. You can just put friends of you and your FH on the same side as your ILs tables to fill out the room. That is what we did, and it worked out really well.

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same here. that's just mean and sneaky. tell them 'sorry charlie, it's full or nothing.'

That's ridiculous! My ILs only had 2 tables becuase so many on their side said no (didn't want to travel...whatever). It's such an unnecessary cost! Those CPs really add up!

I would have your FH tell them that if they insist on doing this, they'll have to pay for the extra CPs. And don't worry...it will still be obvious that they've got fewer guests because even if they hav ethe same number of tables, big tables look ridiculous with only a few people at them.

I know you have issues with your FIL's... but I have a different point of view and would love to share, if I may.

My DH's family invited about 100 more guests that I did. In the end, the difference was only about 4 tables worth - so not much difference.

But, we did tables of 8 and 10, while he was doing tables of 10 and 12. My family and I aren't insecure, but I personally (I paid for my flowers) would rather spend the money on an extra centerpiece.

I didn't want to feel like my side was so many few tables than his. If he did end up having 100 people more than me, we did agree that his tables would be more like 12 and mine would be more like 8-10. That way, I'd have a few more tables.

In end, it worked out that 4 of his tables were on 'my side' and it was fine.

And of course, it has been said before but all of this won't matter in a few months and I hope your relationship with them improves!

Robin - your FILs are a piece of work, it is time you put your foot down with this nonsense of splitting the cost of the wedding. Your FILs have made unreasonable demands and expected your father to pay for half of them. That is grossly unfair, and just generally not nice and it seems they are taking full advantage of your family.

If they are so insecure as to require seating 8 or 10 at a table instead of 12, then they should pay the FULL cost of each CP for each table over their alotment of 6.

I don't want to add to your stress, but I feel compelled to add the following:

You have been bending over backwards to meet the demands of these people, and each time you do, they come back with an even more outrageous demand - and once again you cave in. If you don't grow a backbone before the wedding, you will find them interfering in your marriage, the lives of your children etc. Do yourself a favor and STAND UP FOR YOURSELF!! It is your wedding. The fact that they are contributing half the cost does not give them the right to dictate orders and make demands that YOUR father then has to pay for. Each and every extra should be at their expense 100%. It is your wedding. You are the bride. The day is all about you. If they want to impress people let them throw themselves an anniversary party to show the world how long they've been married, or let them have a vow renewal. Whatever - but YOUR wedding day is not the time for them to be showing off. And now that their guests are soooo not attending, who on earth is left for them to show off to?????

STAND UP FOR YOURSELF AND TELL THEM TO SHOVE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!