Member since
My mother canceled my wedding!
Original post by bride138
Member since
Re: My mother canceled my wedding!
So sorry to hear you are going through this. I agree with what some of the girls posted about you having a heat-to-heart with her and clear the air.
However, that being said I agree with one of the other girls who suggested having a wedding at your new house. I would just plan a scaled down version a nice backyard wedding and maybe in a few years or by your 5th annivesary have a huge party at the rception hall of your choice.
However, that being said I agree with one of the other girls who suggested having a wedding at your new house. I would just plan a scaled down version a nice backyard wedding and maybe in a few years or by your 5th annivesary have a huge party at the rception hall of your choice.
Member since
Re: My mother canceled my wedding!
wow thats nnuts! Im so sorry!!!!![]()
Member since
Re: My mother canceled my wedding!
I'm so sorry, I REALLY hope your mother comes around. I agree that finding a new job would be best even after you (hopefully) make up...
As for the wedding, I've been looking at the websites of the places the girls mentioned above, the prices are unbelievable! And the places look totally nice, you still get everything, including phot, video, flowers, limo, music, etc... for like $35/per person!! The second place, med manor, was all inclusive starting at less than $8,000!! So definitely an option to consider, and they give discounts if you book with short-term notice (well med manor does), so if your date is available that could be perfect!! I'm feeling uber guilty now for the spending orgy we put FMIL through... I didn't know places like this existed![]()
And for what it's worth, I've been through similar stuff with my mom. She actually cancelled all of my college loans on me when I was 17 and couldn't take loans of my own. I'm just finishing school now and I'm 26... but it all really was for the best, my life is amazing b/c of what happened after that, and my mom and I are now closer than ever. I really think everything happens for a reason, and good will come out of even this!! Maybe you'll find a job you absolutely love and never would have gotten otherwise!
Best of luck!!
As for the wedding, I've been looking at the websites of the places the girls mentioned above, the prices are unbelievable! And the places look totally nice, you still get everything, including phot, video, flowers, limo, music, etc... for like $35/per person!! The second place, med manor, was all inclusive starting at less than $8,000!! So definitely an option to consider, and they give discounts if you book with short-term notice (well med manor does), so if your date is available that could be perfect!! I'm feeling uber guilty now for the spending orgy we put FMIL through... I didn't know places like this existed
And for what it's worth, I've been through similar stuff with my mom. She actually cancelled all of my college loans on me when I was 17 and couldn't take loans of my own. I'm just finishing school now and I'm 26... but it all really was for the best, my life is amazing b/c of what happened after that, and my mom and I are now closer than ever. I really think everything happens for a reason, and good will come out of even this!! Maybe you'll find a job you absolutely love and never would have gotten otherwise!
Best of luck!!
Member since
Re: My mother canceled my wedding!
aww i'm so sorry to hear this ![]()
![]()
![]()
i hope it all works out. Maybe you can try a hotels RH? sometimes they can be cheaper
Member since
Re: My mother canceled my wedding!
oh my god im sooo sorry. Maybe u should try and talk to her. i dont know what to say.![]()
Member since
Re: My mother canceled my wedding!
I am very sorry about what has happen. I am having my reception at the same place and your wedding is right after mine. She had no right to do that to you. Have you tried to contact her and talk to her? Here is my advice, call the reception hall , contact Dave he is the Director, talk to him about the problem, and see what he cando. See if the money that she already placed which she is going to lose and put it for another date and you continue making payments even if it is for next year. That is the best advice that I could give. That was very heartless of your mother.
Member since
Re: My mother canceled my wedding!
Posted by bride138
Yeah, from what I know my aunt told me she was faxing over an official letter to cancel it when she was on the phone with her!
Any new news???
Member since
Re: My mother canceled my wedding!
I am so so sorry you have to deal with something like this. I would look for a job right away and call the Reception hall and see what is going on, that is so wrong of your mother to do this to you. Hang in there, things will work out......Also, Look in the local small papers and in the Li Newsday, once in a blue moon a couple has to cancel there wedding and they offer like 50 % off the total amount of the reception or to take over the payments or for cheap so the dont lose it all. Its well worth investigating, again I am so sorry you are dealing with this, best of luck to you.
Member since
Re: My mother canceled my wedding!
Posted by JBoothIn2008
Posted by MJDoc12
holy cow!!!!!
i wish i had a word of advice---just![]()
![]()
![]()
![]()
maybe she will cool down and come to her senses. she can't just cancel the hall like that over the phone--she has to do it thru certified mail with an official letter....so hopefully she will come to her senses and not cancel it after all.
good luck!
Yes, that's true. Most rh, if not all, make the bride and groom sign the contract, and they will NOT take anyone else's word for it that the wedding is cancelled, even if it's the mother who's paying. It's the bride and groom's wedding. No one else can cancel. Call the RH yourself and see if your mom called. Maybe she just wants you to think she did so that things begin to turn in her favor???![]()
![]()
![]()
![]()
![]()
Hope things turn around for you. Maybe you can have a nice, calm talk with her and discuss this???
that really stinks. i hope she cools off and things go back to normal
i was thinking too that the bride & groom usually sign, so she might not have the power to cancel it.
Member since
Re: My mother canceled my wedding!
Posted by KRISTYRUSSELL
I am so so sorry you have to deal with something like this. I would look for a job right away and call the Reception hall and see what is going on, that is so wrong of your mother to do this to you. Hang in there, things will work out......Also, Look in the local small papers and in the Li Newsday, once in a blue moon a couple has to cancel there wedding and they offer like 50 % off the total amount of the reception or to take over the payments or for cheap so the dont lose it all. Its well worth investigating, again I am so sorry you are dealing with this, best of luck to you.
an LIW bride cancelled her 6/1/08 wedding (only one day different) so maybe she could work that out with her?
Member since
Re: My mother canceled my wedding!
Wow that's horrible. I'm soooooooo sorry to hear that.
I was having drama with my mom too and she threatened me not to come to my wedding. I cried for 7 hours straight the night it happened. My drama was over my Dad being escorted into the RH, during the parent's introductions, with his wife (who he's been married to for 22 years btw). My father's wife is the woman he left my mother for so my Mom felt it would be disloyal, a betrayal and disrespectful to have his wife walk in with him. I've made peace with my parent's divorce and happen to love & respect my father's wife. I also have a very good relationship with my Dad. I tried to be sensitive to my Mom's feelings (can't imagine how difficult that whole ordeal was for her) but at the same time I couldn't deny my father his right to walk in with his spouse. My mother and I didn't speak for 3 days but luckily my Aunt (my mother's sister) helped smoothed things out. We have the same manicurist and she also talked to my Mom (sometimes the objective point of view helps). My Mom finally decided that this was my day and she was going to do her motherly duty to back me up and support me on the most important day of my life.
Bottom line-cooler heads will prevail, and your Mom will come to her senses. Do you have any family friends that could talk to your Mom on your behalf? I pray this works out for you![]()
![]()
![]()
I was having drama with my mom too and she threatened me not to come to my wedding. I cried for 7 hours straight the night it happened. My drama was over my Dad being escorted into the RH, during the parent's introductions, with his wife (who he's been married to for 22 years btw). My father's wife is the woman he left my mother for so my Mom felt it would be disloyal, a betrayal and disrespectful to have his wife walk in with him. I've made peace with my parent's divorce and happen to love & respect my father's wife. I also have a very good relationship with my Dad. I tried to be sensitive to my Mom's feelings (can't imagine how difficult that whole ordeal was for her) but at the same time I couldn't deny my father his right to walk in with his spouse. My mother and I didn't speak for 3 days but luckily my Aunt (my mother's sister) helped smoothed things out. We have the same manicurist and she also talked to my Mom (sometimes the objective point of view helps). My Mom finally decided that this was my day and she was going to do her motherly duty to back me up and support me on the most important day of my life.
Bottom line-cooler heads will prevail, and your Mom will come to her senses. Do you have any family friends that could talk to your Mom on your behalf? I pray this works out for you
Member since
Re: My mother canceled my wedding!
Awww I'm soooo sorry this happened to you! I agree with the other girls, even though I know it ***** you can't have it where you originally planned, I would go with something you could pay for yourself that way you don't have to deal with your mom controlling it. Feel better ![]()
![]()
![]()
Member since
Re: My mother canceled my wedding!
Wow!
Member since
Re: My mother canceled my wedding!
WOW- That is SO CRAZY!
I would call the hall and explain the situation. There is a very good chance your mother will loose her deposit and even a better chance your hall will not be able to re-sell that day and time on such short notice, so you might be able to take the date over and finish paying for it yourselves (or re-negotiate a smaller package)... it would be cheaper than starting over and it would benefit both you and the hall.
Good Luck and let me know how it goes.
I would call the hall and explain the situation. There is a very good chance your mother will loose her deposit and even a better chance your hall will not be able to re-sell that day and time on such short notice, so you might be able to take the date over and finish paying for it yourselves (or re-negotiate a smaller package)... it would be cheaper than starting over and it would benefit both you and the hall.
Good Luck and let me know how it goes.
Member since
Re: My mother canceled my wedding!
I cant believe your own mother would do that to you!!! ![]()
![]()
![]()
![]()
My thoughts are with you, I hope everything works out!!!
Member since
Re: My mother canceled my wedding!
That is so horrible!
I feel so bad that you're having this hard of a time with you own mother- also that she fired you on top of things!
I would call the RH and all your vendors and explain the situation- they probably can work something out with you.
Also if you and your FH signed the contracts, then she shouldn't be able to just cancel everything- the vendors should contact you and let you know what she's trying to do.
I feel so bad that you're having this hard of a time with you own mother- also that she fired you on top of things!
I would call the RH and all your vendors and explain the situation- they probably can work something out with you.
Also if you and your FH signed the contracts, then she shouldn't be able to just cancel everything- the vendors should contact you and let you know what she's trying to do.
Member since
Re: My mother canceled my wedding!
No words of advice, just ![]()
![]()
![]()
![]()
Member since
Re: My mother canceled my wedding!
First let me say how sorry I am that this is happening to you. I booked WM but did go see Chateau La Mer and it was nice. I have priced out a zillion places and CLM along with Swan Club seem to be the best price. I am in the winter which helped but he quoted me $60 pp and was even ready to negotiate lower when I told him I was booking elsewhere! Again, that was for a Friday in February but if you can pick a date between the end of november and the end of March they will probably honor that price. FM me if ya have any questions...I would love to help!
Member since
Re: My mother canceled my wedding!
i'm so sorry to hear that.... mother/daughter relationships can be tough and can get even more strained when it comes to the wedding, where some mothers typically 'live their own lives' through their daughter. I really hope everything works out! ![]()
![]()
