My mother doesn't agree with the wedding

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Posted by twisted762006

And hopefully tomorrow's post will be a good report on how these discussions go for me. Thank you again for your support and your words of wisdom.

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good luck!

If you're scard of the LD thing, and need someone to talk to, Drop me an FM. There are so many little things that make the time go by faster.

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Posted by twisted762006

I thank you all for the replies. It's really made me think. I completely understand all the different sides everyone is taking and for that I'm thankful. I will really consider what to do. But I guess my whole reason for this is my lack of being able to see him for the next year. He is going to a Tech school, and I'm stuck at my college that's approximately 6 hours away, which puts us and our relationship in quite a strain. By getting married in 2006 we could cut down our away time, and I would be able to go to the college of my choice rather than staying in state for a college that will cost less money and be farther away from him. And for all who were asking, I know I am young. I am 17, but I am also very capable of making mature, informed decisions. I will take the advice of talking to my mother and my FH in hopes of getting all this sorted out. There are many reasons for our possible decision of getting married next year, and I believe that this will make us happiest. We have talked many months of how to go about this, and so far we've found next year to be our best option.

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how old is your fh?i believe you are waayy too young! no offense to you..i was 17 once and i know how great it is to be in love with your boyfriend.and how much it would hurt to not be close to him while he is at school..but dont use marriage to try and bring you closer..you have not lived life yet ..at ALL..you may be mature for your age but NO WAY have you had experience..there will be heartbreaks and hurtful things that you will go thru but you cant run away from them..you guys are young..and especially for a young man? he will want to explore his options as well..take it slow and see what the long distance relationship brings you..if you are meant to be you are meant to be..but dont be afraid of what life brings you..you cant stop what will happen..and being young and going to college is all part of growing up..and if you got married or not you are still going thru that experience..just keep your head up..a marriage is a wonderful experience..and you will def want your family to be happy with you..your mom is right..you are too young for her to even support you.she knows best..she knows what she went thru and when she grew up she hoped that you dont do the same..because as much as she loves her children she would have waited to do the things she could have.just take some time.focus on school and love your boyfriend..you guys sound like you love eachother but it also sounds like you want to use marriage to keep him faithful..i know it must be scary but hang in there!!

I think you're making the best decision by waiting. I have been teaching college for seven years and I'm always struck by how much my female students change from freshman year to sophomore year. It's this amazing time where you have the most independence of your life - emotionally, physically and intellectually. I think your marriage will be stronger if you wait.

Congratulations!

Im glad that you are planning to wait now.
Its true that distance does really test a relationship...but when you are ready to get married it will be for the right reasons and you will have confidence in the relationship.
Good Luck...and enjoy college...dont sit around waiting or counting the days till you see your Fh next...go out and enjoy the whole college experience. You are only young once.

Thank you once again for your input. On the bright side ( ) I have talked to both my FH and my mother and all three of us have agreed that possibly June of 2007, but most likely June 2008, is when we are getting married. This way I will be half way through college and my FH will be done and ready for a steady job. After talking it over, even with the LD problem, I feel that this is the best decision we could make. And yes, I am young (everyone has let me know that) so this will give me a chance to be on my own and grow into my own person. I will however, need a lot of support through the next two years, and I'm glad that I have experienced brides that can help me, especially ones who were in my same position at one point or another. College life will be great, even if my FH is away from me.

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Posted by twisted762006

Thank you once again for your input. On the bright side ( ) I have talked to both my FH and my mother and all three of us have agreed that possibly June of 2007, but most likely June 2008, is when we are getting married. This way I will be half way through college and my FH will be done and ready for a steady job. After talking it over, even with the LD problem, I feel that this is the best decision we could make. And yes, I am young (everyone has let me know that) so this will give me a chance to be on my own and grow into my own person. I will however, need a lot of support through the next two years, and I'm glad that I have experienced brides that can help me, especially ones who were in my same position at one point or another. College life will be great, even if my FH is away from me.

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LD is tough - i know, i've been there (not only my freshman year - but for most of spring semester lost year).

I'm glad you made a decision that everyone feels comfortable with. And if you need anything - feel free to FM me!

If I may add in some input, please:

First of all, I thought I was with the love of my life at 17 too. I was a 'mature' 17 year old, but I was SUCH AN IDIOT!!!!!! Ladies, honestly, if you knew this guy you would've all thought I'd lost my mind.

Second of all, (and not to upset any of the HS Sweetheart B2Bs, but this is an important perspective) one of my best friends got engaged to her High School Sweetheart during college, got married a year out of Undergrad after having lived with him for that year, and is separated, waiting for divorce papers to go through, less than two years after the wedding. If there is one thing she regrets, it's being engaged during college and missing out on all the fun she could've had.

Seriously, take it slow. You're too young to limit yourself.

I think you are making a wonderful decision and you sound like you have a good head on shoulders, regardless of your age. I myself am in a LD relationship (Me in NY FH in Texas) We are going to different medical schools and we are making it work. LD is difficult but it can be done.

My motto is 'Absence is to love what wind is to fire, it extinguishes the small and enkindles the great'

FM me if you ever want to talk/commiserate over our LD situations

Good luck with any decision you make and remember us brides are always here for you

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Posted by twisted762006

Thank you once again for your input. On the bright side ( ) I have talked to both my FH and my mother and all three of us have agreed that possibly June of 2007, but most likely June 2008, is when we are getting married. This way I will be half way through college and my FH will be done and ready for a steady job. After talking it over, even with the LD problem, I feel that this is the best decision we could make. And yes, I am young (everyone has let me know that) so this will give me a chance to be on my own and grow into my own person. I will however, need a lot of support through the next two years, and I'm glad that I have experienced brides that can help me, especially ones who were in my same position at one point or another. College life will be great, even if my FH is away from me.

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You go, girl!

im so happy everything worked out for you!!!

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Posted by twisted762006

Thank you once again for your input. On the bright side ( ) I have talked to both my FH and my mother and all three of us have agreed that possibly June of 2007, but most likely June 2008, is when we are getting married. This way I will be half way through college and my FH will be done and ready for a steady job. After talking it over, even with the LD problem, I feel that this is the best decision we could make. And yes, I am young (everyone has let me know that) so this will give me a chance to be on my own and grow into my own person. I will however, need a lot of support through the next two years, and I'm glad that I have experienced brides that can help me, especially ones who were in my same position at one point or another. College life will be great, even if my FH is away from me.

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From reading this...I can tell you are right - you are a mature 17 year old because what you said above is a mature, well thought out solution to a dilemma. And you and your FH will have lots of those dillemmas and if you keep solving them like you did - you will do GREAT!

Congratulations - and trust me, 2008 will be here WAY before you know it!!!