Ok many of you know that it is not often that i am at a loss for words
So, one of my friends of about 10 years emailed me this after I did not receive her RSVP:
Hi Laura,
I just sent the response card back. I want to apologize for responding so late. Unfortunately, I won't be able to make it. To make a long story short, my sister finished # 2 in her company for the year. They are taking away the top sales reps. She had a bad breakup recently with her boyfriend. I am going to go on the trip with her in his place. She is so embarrassed, but she obviously can't show up alone. I'm so sorry, I really wanted to be there to share your special day. I hope you understand.
Melissa
I got another email from her today asking me if i received the first email since i did not respond What should I say?? I am disappointed she isnt coming.
bella1028
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Re: Need Advice
wow...thats a tough one...i am not sure what the right advice is..i do think as cliche as it sounds, 'honestly is the best policy'....i think that you could maybe express that you are disappointed...it may not change a thing though...is this someone who you kept in close contact with throughout the planning of your wedding?
meg193
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I would send her an email back telling her that you wished she would have let you know sooner but you hope she has a good time. It's probably not worth it to say anything else because it will only cause a fight.
jgl
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Re: Need Advice
i would tell her that you are disappointed but can see how the situation can but her in a tough situation of choosing, but that you understand (im guessing that you do??) and that she will be missed that day and that you hope all works out for them.
maybe add something about planning a date after the honeymonn for her to come and you can get together
Snowflake08
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Re: Need Advice
Posted by bella1028
wow...thats a tough one...i am not sure what the right advice is..i do think as cliche as it sounds, 'honestly is the best policy'....i think that you could maybe express that you are disappointed...it may not change a thing though...is this someone who you kept in close contact with throughout the planning of your wedding?
i dont know what is considered 'close contact'. we talk online a lot and about once a month on the phone but i sent out STD's a year ago
Snick n Nick
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Re: Need Advice
Posted by jgl
i would tell her that you are disappointed but can see how the situation can but her in a tough situation of choosing, but that you understand (im guessing that you do??) and that she will be missed that day and that you hope all works out for them.
maybe add something about planning a date after the honeymonn for her to come and you can get together
My thoughts exactly....!
Wifeynella
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Re: Need Advice
wow... thats stinks... i think replying with the truth is best... that you are disappointed that she cant be there but you understand her sister needs her and offer to have dinner after your HM. its just not worth stressing over (im learning still.. lol)
SugaBeans
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Re: Need Advice
hm... if she is a friend of yours for a long time i would expect that she would want to be there but im sure she wants to be there for her sister as well. i would let her know that you are disappointed that she wont be there and you wish she was but you understand that she wants to be there for her sister too. ?????
snwb08
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Re: Need Advice
hm.. it ***** that she's not coming but at least she's being straight with you and didn't make up some story, and apologized for waiting so long. she probably waited that long to be sure she couldn't go. But you know her better - if she's the type who's really trying to be there for her sister, I wouldn't be mad at her.
bella1028
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Re: Need Advice
Posted by Snowflake08
Posted by bella1028
wow...thats a tough one...i am not sure what the right advice is..i do think as cliche as it sounds, 'honestly is the best policy'....i think that you could maybe express that you are disappointed...it may not change a thing though...is this someone who you kept in close contact with throughout the planning of your wedding?
i dont know what is considered 'close contact'. we talk online a lot and about once a month on the phone but i sent out STD's a year ago
i see what you mean...if std's were sent out a year ago, she should be there...would you consider telling her how you feel?
bella1028
Posted:
Member since
Re: Need Advice
Posted by jgl
i would tell her that you are disappointed but can see how the situation can but her in a tough situation of choosing, but that you understand (im guessing that you do??) and that she will be missed that day and that you hope all works out for them.
maybe add something about planning a date after the honeymonn for her to come and you can get together
good idea
Autumn08
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Re: Need Advice
I agree that 'honesty is the best policy' and you should probably plan to see each other after the honeymoon. It's ok to be dissappointed as you were probably looking forward to seeing her. I hope everything works out.
Soon2BMrsD
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Re: Need Advice
Posted by jgl
i would tell her that you are disappointed but can see how the situation can but her in a tough situation of choosing, but that you understand (im guessing that you do??) and that she will be missed that day and that you hope all works out for them.
maybe add something about planning a date after the honeymonn for her to come and you can get together
i couldnt have said it better myself i think that would be the best!
Snowflake08
Posted:
Member since
Re: Need Advice
Posted by bella1028
Posted by Snowflake08
Posted by bella1028
wow...thats a tough one...i am not sure what the right advice is..i do think as cliche as it sounds, 'honestly is the best policy'....i think that you could maybe express that you are disappointed...it may not change a thing though...is this someone who you kept in close contact with throughout the planning of your wedding?
i dont know what is considered 'close contact'. we talk online a lot and about once a month on the phone but i sent out STD's a year ago
i see what you mean...if std's were sent out a year ago, she should be there...would you consider telling her how you feel?
i think that is why i am upset its not that im not understanding, but she knew about the wedding for a year and i know her sister i cant imagine she doesnt have a friend to bring on the trip i dont know it its worth saying anything though i guess i'll just tell her im sorry she wont be there
bella1028
Posted:
Member since
Re: Need Advice
Posted by Snowflake08
Posted by bella1028
Posted by Snowflake08
Posted by bella1028
wow...thats a tough one...i am not sure what the right advice is..i do think as cliche as it sounds, 'honestly is the best policy'....i think that you could maybe express that you are disappointed...it may not change a thing though...is this someone who you kept in close contact with throughout the planning of your wedding?
i dont know what is considered 'close contact'. we talk online a lot and about once a month on the phone but i sent out STD's a year ago
i see what you mean...if std's were sent out a year ago, she should be there...would you consider telling her how you feel?
i think that is why i am upset its not that im not understanding, but she knew about the wedding for a year and i know her sister i cant imagine she doesnt have a friend to bring on the trip i dont know it its worth saying anything though i guess i'll just tell her im sorry she wont be there
i completely understand how you would be feeling upset by this...i guess to avoid any sort of hostility in the future, maybe dont say anything???...im sorry
laura33
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Re: Need Advice
i would say that i am going to be honest but i am extremely hurt that you didnt let me know sooner and you will not be attending the wedding but i guess your sister needs you and i understand
kellybean
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I understand being upset but thats her sister . Im not even that close to my sis but in that situation she would have dropped everything to be there for me. I understand your wedding is important but thats her sister and if her sister isnt in a good place then I honestly feel it should be understood that she needs to be there for her. she was honest with you which is great and seemed to feel bad she couldnt be there. though you sent out STDs a year ago Im sure her sister didnt forsee this happening a year ago if that makes any sense? talk to her let her know you are disappointed.
cuttieforreal
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Posted by Snick n Nick
Posted by jgl
i would tell her that you are disappointed but can see how the situation can but her in a tough situation of choosing, but that you understand (im guessing that you do??) and that she will be missed that day and that you hope all works out for them.
maybe add something about planning a date after the honeymonn for her to come and you can get together
