OK, so when my hubby and I were making our guest list, his mom's friends (a couple that my hubby and I know through his mom), asked if we can invite their daughter and her fiance. I have met one time and my husband has met her three times. Neither of us has met her FH. We thought about it and as a favour for his mom, we agreed. They are getting married on June 23 and they wanted to see what our wedding was like..........
Anyways, so we get their RSVP back to our wedding and they are coming, as we already knew. About two weeks prior to our wedding, we get an invitation to their wedding and feel that since we are friends with her mom and dad, we'd go to their wedding.....and they WERE coming to our wedding...........so we sent our RSVP in.
So anyways, in the end, they never showed up to our wedding. They never called to cancel or anything. Her parents came though......her mom told me that her daughter couldnt' come becuase she had her bridal shower on that day I was surprised and mad that she never showed up after her mother asked us to invite them, and asked her how long the shower was planned for and if her daughter knew about it, thinking that maybe it was a surprise shower?????
Her mom said she has known about it for over a month...........
So I am VERY bothered by this and dont' want to go to their wedding.......as I said, we don't really even know them. My husband thinks we should go, not eat the food and just drink as much as possible or double fist it. His mom says we should snub their wedding as they did ours.........I agree.
What would you do in this situation......
KandR419
Posted:
Member since
Re: Need help and honest opinions about a situation
Posted by billandme
My husbands issue is he feels it will be awkward when we are around her parents
IMO, I would think that her parents should feel awkward around you and your husband, after they asked if you could invite the daughter and her FH, then having them be a no show, no call, nothing because of a bridal shower. (And you have every right to be upset by it. I wouldn't go to the wedding)
bride2b24
Posted:
Member since
Re: Need help and honest opinions about a situation
dont be the bigger person! seriously i would respong yes and not show up just like they did to you.....im sure her Shower was on that day and her mom missed it?
HelenZ
Posted:
Member since
Re: Need help and honest opinions about a situation
if I were you, I wouldn't go......you invited them in the first place as a favor to your MIL, so don't trouble yourself with going to theirs.......why don't you pass the message through the parents that you have a shower to go to that day or would that be too 'in your face' and obvious that its retaliation???
August12
Posted:
Member since
Re: Need help and honest opinions about a situation
agreed.
dont prove that you are on the same level.
call in advance and cancel.
Mrs.NicolaXoXo
Posted:
Member since
Re: Need help and honest opinions about a situation
Personally, I would not want to go either. Although, I would let them know I'm not coming. Very politely, I would say that something last minute came up (call them, send a card). I would feel better doing it this way because then I'm a winner in both sences. You let them no the RIGHT way that you could not make it and you don't have to waist your time at someones wedding that you don't even know!!!!
billandme
Posted:
Member since
Re: Need help and honest opinions about a situation
thank you for all of your opinions and advice. I think I'm going to tell my hubby that I am not going........
people are just so rude sometimes .......
BrideChrissy
Posted:
Member since
Re: Need help and honest opinions about a situation
I Definitley WOULD NOT GO!!! I wouldn't not show up and do what they did, I would be the bigger person and call but I defintley would not go.
Mrs_C_in_'07
Posted:
Member since
Re: Need help and honest opinions about a situation
I agree with your mom. Snub em!!!
That is so not nice what they did!!!!!!
Roed522
Posted:
Member since
Re: Need help and honest opinions about a situation
I personally would send back the response with a simple WILL NOT ATTEND checked off and that's it. NO reason as you why you can't come, Def. NO Gift with response, call it a day and you'll be the better person in the end OR You can hold on to the response wait for her to call, which will piss her off and when she calls to ask if you're coming simply say 'oh I totally forgot about it, yeah sorry we can't make it, I have an appointment for a manicure. That'll burn her
melissankurt07
Posted:
Member since
Re: Need help and honest opinions about a situation
OK, let me get this straight. She knew about her shower but still RSVP that she WOULD come to your wedding? How rude that she didn't show. What I don't get is that if her shower was that DAY why she still couldn't come at night to the reception. Her mother still made it. It isn't like it was her bacherlorette party. That makes no sense. I think it was just an excuse!!!] I would definitely NOT go to her wedding!!!!! That was just plain RUDE!!!!!!!
SylvieB
Posted:
Member since
Re: Need help and honest opinions about a situation
I wouldn't go... Why would the mom ask for her to be invited if she knew about the shower? And if I was the girl, I would have at least send a gift, being a bride myself. But I would call and say something came up, don't just not show up. Be the bigger person in that respect.
AlmostKulak
Posted:
Member since
Re: Need help and honest opinions about a situation
Why wasn't her mom at her daughter's shower?? Anyways, I would just reply 'no' and leave it at that, if anybody asks why tell them you had a hair appt you scheduled months ago,
stealthgroom
Posted:
Member since
Re: Need help and honest opinions about a situation
I'm torn about what you should do about this. On one hand, part of me thinks you should be the better person and give them advance warning. OTOH, i'm having such a hard time paring down my guest list that if two people didn't show, people I hadn't chose to invite and lost two places for friends because of it, I'd be so furious I'd either incovenience them, or show up and do as much damage (food and booze wise) as possible. But I'm a guy, we're like that.
--the stealth groom
ammy1403
Posted:
Member since
Re: Need help and honest opinions about a situation
Don't Go.
Michy
Posted:
Member since
Re: Need help and honest opinions about a situation
I am stubborn so I would not show up to their's. That is very rude that they did that and you and your husband had to pay for two people who said they were coming but ultimately knew they weren't going to go.
hunnybunnyxoxo
Posted:
Member since
Re: Need help and honest opinions about a situation
oh that is messed up!! hmm, i think maybe you should go, and not give an envelope? technically you lost money by her not showing up. i know its tacky but weddings can be political, and if she was invited to yours and was a no show, than she should know better.
you dont snub someone period but she should def. not have snubbed you knowing she has her own wedding coming up
GinaBambina08
Posted:
Member since
Re: Need help and honest opinions about a situation
I always say two wrongs don't make a right, but in this situation....it's pretty hard I don't see why she couldn't have called to say they wouldn't be making it, how rude! I would be inclined to tell you to snub their wedding, but I'm thinking that might be petty...as bad as I do want to suggest that, i'm not sure....
hunnybunnyxoxo
Posted:
Member since
Re: Need help and honest opinions about a situation
i was just reading other responses and i still think you should go and not give an envelope!!
that is the ultimate snub!! come on free food, liquor, dancing!
do it!
and she'll never have the balls to ask you if you gave an envelope or not, and if she does, say yes, that you gave an envelope...
