need hugs- marriage woes...

everyone tells me the first year is hell. But it seems like it's more than that. Have you considered counselling? That may be the only way to find out for sure. Maybe you can talk to the priest or rabbi, etc who married you. Have you talked to DH about how you're feeling?

I hope it all works out

Kristi, I don't know what to say. I think you just have to give it time and put the house and kids on the back burner. DH and I desperately want a house, and we even went out looking. Do you know how many fights we have gotten in over a house. I am just as stubborn as you. I want what I want when I want it. But I saw all the rpoblems it was causing and I realized that it just wasn't a reality yet and put it on the back burner. Same with kids. I say every day I want one, but its just not feasable yet. I definitely don't think you should give up yet. I know you love your husband. And the two of you got married for one reason, because you love each other. I think you have to focus on the two of you and nothing else. Everything else will come in time. The first year is the toughest. There are days I ask myself why I married my husband because I get so damn frustrated with him. But then I look beyond stuff and see why. That is what you have to do. Look beyond all the other stuff. Do ya want to go to lunch tomorrow?? I miss ya!! I'll get ya out for a bit!! Just don't give up yet !!!!!

Kristi, I hope you are feeling better. FM me if you need anything at all!!!!!
Karissa

thanks again for everyones hugs and prayers. I was a little tipsy last night so it didnt help things. im off to a nysut class so i guess hubby andi will talk later.... i have such a headache though!!!!

p.s. anyone know how to fix a small whole in sheetrock? i think its sheetrock... i threw the remote and it made a whole the sixe of a half dollar in our wall!!! add PMS to all of this and that was the outcome!

My first year of marriage was a mess. I lost my job 4 days after I came back from my honeymoon, which started our life together on the wrong foot. I was unemployed for a month whe I finally got a job right after thanksgiving, making less money. I worked my butt off for 5 months trying to prove myself and that I was an asset. I even went on trips and such for this job, all while trying to enjoy my first year of marriage. During this 5 months my videographer took off with my video. Our first valentine's we had to put our beloved cat to sleep. All this put stress and strain on our relationship. Then right before we were supposed to go on vacation, guess what! I was laid off again because things were not working out. I was not shocked, but more pissed then anything. I was out of work for 3 months.

There are more things that went on, but I am not going into those. All these went into causing me to be depressed. I thought life sucks and nothing is working for us. I was a loser etc.....

It was only after my 1st anniversary did I start to enjoy our life together. I am not saying the exact same thing will happen for you, because it is obvious you have undlying issues. What I am trying to say is that the first year may not be all kisses and ove making. I thought it would be, but life through a wrench at me.

We are going on our 2nd anniversay and things are very different. I have been working for a year and we are learning to deal with issues together as they come, which means I don't have to take on the world alone.

Hugs to you.
mish

I hope everything works out for the best!

I am sending you many of these

I hope the two of you are able to work this out.

Kristi,



Feel free to FM me if you ever need a shoulder.

Kristi,
I just wanted to send you more and let you know that I hope everything works out for you two. I also understand how you feel. I was married before and I realized less than a year into the marriage that I had made a mistake. I spent the next six years trying to fix it and now regret wasting that seven years. Thankfully, I am now married to a wonderful man about whom I have no doubts...so I can only recommend counseling and do what is right for you!

i hope everything works itself out....