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Need to Vent *Sorry so long*

Original post by bemyyoko

Let me start by saying that I just got stood up by my own parents.
We were supposed to go to the beach to get their parking permit and then my mom and I were going to go look at wedding gowns. I still have to get to the Macy's in Smithhaven because I have to get my money back. But my mom wants me to try the gown on in front of her so she can see how it looks before i make a final decision.

Fine... even though i know i hate that dress and the more i think about it the more upset i get. I'm paying for the gown myself, and if I don't get there by next Saturday I'm out the deposit I made on it, so I'll end up keeping a gown I hate because I cant afford to lose the money even if it is only $100

So, yea they stood me up so we're not going. I figured that's fine because my ex-SIL is supposed to call me today to go with her daughters to start looking at dresses for them since they are my JBM's. She hasnt called, so i call her and she's not home.

My MOH is busy. She's always busy. and my other BM lives in queens and is impossible to meet up with.

I feel like this wedding doesnt matter to anyone other than me. I don't expect people to drop what they are doing and come when I snap my fingers. However, I've been trying to get everyone on the same page for months now.
I am 9 months out... with no idea what kind of gown to get. This eliminates certain designers who I was told i would have to pay rush fees to get after 10months.
I can't pick the BM dresses untill I pick a style of wedding gown for myself. I'd rather not get their dresses at all untill i have mine finalized but that doesnt seem possible.

I'm so close to just canceling the whole thing and going to town hall next week. I found an adorable white sundress that i could wear, and FH has a suit that will work just fine.

Isnt getting a gown supposed to be the best part aside from the actual getting married part?
The gowns are making me cry... but not in the way they are supposed to.

Sorry ladies... i know this was rather bratty.
I'm just sorta sick of feeling invisible.
Toucan311 Posted:

Re: Need to Vent *Sorry so long*

Posted by bemyyoko

Posted by Mimacat

I'm totally in! Any reason to shop is fine w/me :)


sweet and while we're out we can TP my ex SIL's car!!


Now thats what I'm talking about! I'm there. Lets go. I'm confident we can find you a beautiful dress that isnt $890898 dollars.
Princess Cut Bride Posted:

Re: Need to Vent *Sorry so long*

Awwww sorry you are going through this!!! Why is everyone being so bad??!!!! Let's blame it on the intense sun today!!!

Don't worry you gave time...you will get everything done. As for your dress...if you really don't like it why don't you look around. I'm sure you can apply that deposit to a veil or some type of accessory.
I had put down $100 at the Macy's in Manhassett but I ended up getting my dress at a shop closer to where I live. So the woman told me I can use it as a credit towards anything...bm dresses mob dresses/ veil/ tiara...whatever.

Just don't settle because you don't think you have enough time because waiting another week or two will not make a big difference!!

Good luck to you!!!!!
bemyyoko Posted:

Re: Need to Vent *Sorry so long*

Posted by SugaBeans

you are not being bratty at all! I agree with you, $100 is $100 and ever penny counts right now. I'll go with you to see this dress! I feel bad that your family isnt giving you the time of day. Thats not cool at all. SOmetimes you just have to do what you want and not worry about what other people think. i know you said you want to go to get your money back and since you are paying for it, i dont think you should have to wait for anyone. they should be accomodating to you. you need a lot of help right now and for you fam to be there for you. have you explained to them how you feel?

Good luck and remember I will go with you if you want! I love looking at dresses!


it's nice that you can understand where i'm coming from. i've tried explaining but they all think i'm being a spoiled brat.

maybe we really should all go together.... i'm sure if enough of you come one of you will like the same dress as me! lol
bemyyoko Posted:

Re: Need to Vent *Sorry so long*

Posted by Princess Cut Bride

Awwww sorry you are going through this!!! Why is everyone being so bad??!!!! Let's blame it on the intense sun today!!!

Don't worry you gave time...you will get everything done. As for your dress...if you really don't like it why don't you look around. I'm sure you can apply that deposit to a veil or some type of accessory.
I had put down $100 at the Macy's in Manhassett but I ended up getting my dress at a shop closer to where I live. So the woman told me I can use it as a credit towards anything...bm dresses mob dresses/ veil/ tiara...whatever.

Just don't settle because you don't think you have enough time because waiting another week or two will not make a big difference!!

Good luck to you!!!!!


thank you! yea i can use the $100 towards anything in the salon but I cant even get the bridal party together to look at BM dresses! and my mom cant afford to get her MOB dress at the Macy's bridal salon. But I'm keepin my fingers crossed that this all works out.
bemyyoko Posted:

Re: Need to Vent *Sorry so long*

Posted by Mimacat

Posted by bemyyoko

Posted by Mimacat

I'm totally in! Any reason to shop is fine w/me :)


sweet and while we're out we can TP my ex SIL's car!!


Now thats what I'm talking about! I'm there. Lets go. I'm confident we can find you a beautiful dress that isnt $890898 dollars.


seriously!! why are gowns like a gazillion dollars??
Toucan311 Posted:

Re: Need to Vent *Sorry so long*

Well if Milk & Sugar wont take res, we should do a 'FIX BEMYYOKOS DRESS WOES' event and then go for dessert.

bemyyoko Posted:

Re: Need to Vent *Sorry so long*

Posted by Mimacat

Well if Milk & Sugar wont take res, we should do a 'FIX BEMYYOKOS DRESS WOES' event and then go for dessert.

OMG that would be amazing. but instead of dessert i say margaritas! and dessert lol
Toucan311 Posted:

Re: Need to Vent *Sorry so long*

Listen, I'm all for something like pouring liquor right over a pie, thats a great dessert in my book.

Princess Cut Bride Posted:

Re: Need to Vent *Sorry so long*

Posted by bemyyoko

Posted by Princess Cut Bride

Awwww sorry you are going through this!!! Why is everyone being so bad??!!!! Let's blame it on the intense sun today!!!

Don't worry you gave time...you will get everything done. As for your dress...if you really don't like it why don't you look around. I'm sure you can apply that deposit to a veil or some type of accessory.
I had put down $100 at the Macy's in Manhassett but I ended up getting my dress at a shop closer to where I live. So the woman told me I can use it as a credit towards anything...bm dresses mob dresses/ veil/ tiara...whatever.

Just don't settle because you don't think you have enough time because waiting another week or two will not make a big difference!!

Good luck to you!!!!!


thank you! yea i can use the $100 towards anything in the salon but I cant even get the bridal party together to look at BM dresses! and my mom cant afford to get her MOB dress at the Macy's bridal salon. But I'm keepin my fingers crossed that this all works out.


I read on the 07 boards that one of the mob boughther dress at Estelle's for only $200 and it was beautiful!!!
do you know what dress you want for the BM? If they can't all get together I would email them a pic and tell them to go to the salon and get fitted. I don't know what your schedule is like but maybe you can meet the girls there when they go. Just an idea...since they are being difficult.
Toucan311 Posted:

Re: Need to Vent *Sorry so long*

Or just pick something hideous for them, and teach them a lesson. I'm all for didactic dress shopping.

bemyyoko Posted:

Re: Need to Vent *Sorry so long*

Posted by Princess Cut Bride

Posted by bemyyoko

Posted by Princess Cut Bride

Awwww sorry you are going through this!!! Why is everyone being so bad??!!!! Let's blame it on the intense sun today!!!

Don't worry you gave time...you will get everything done. As for your dress...if you really don't like it why don't you look around. I'm sure you can apply that deposit to a veil or some type of accessory.
I had put down $100 at the Macy's in Manhassett but I ended up getting my dress at a shop closer to where I live. So the woman told me I can use it as a credit towards anything...bm dresses mob dresses/ veil/ tiara...whatever.

Just don't settle because you don't think you have enough time because waiting another week or two will not make a big difference!!

Good luck to you!!!!!


thank you! yea i can use the $100 towards anything in the salon but I cant even get the bridal party together to look at BM dresses! and my mom cant afford to get her MOB dress at the Macy's bridal salon. But I'm keepin my fingers crossed that this all works out.


I read on the 07 boards that one of the mob boughther dress at Estelle's for only $200 and it was beautiful!!!
do you know what dress you want for the BM? If they can't all get together I would email them a pic and tell them to go to the salon and get fitted. I don't know what your schedule is like but maybe you can meet the girls there when they go. Just an idea...since they are being difficult.


My mom and I love Estelle's. One of the gows i love for myself is under $600 there!! We'll definately be checking there for MOB dresses.

I have a diverse bridal party, so i need to see the dresses on all of the girls before deciding on one. The girls are not all the same race, the same size, or the same age group so I want to make sure it's something everyone is comfortable with.
jsta76 Posted:

Re: Need to Vent *Sorry so long*

Posted by bemyyoko

My mom and I love Estelle's. One of the gows i love for myself is under $600 there!! We'll definately be checking there for MOB dresses.

I have a diverse bridal party, so i need to see the dresses on all of the girls before deciding on one. The girls are not all the same race, the same size, or the same age group so I want to make sure it's something everyone is comfortable with.


I love Estelles too, they have so much there and most at really great prices. I got a dress there close to 10 years ago and i can't tell you how many times I've worn it.
bemyyoko Posted:

Re: Need to Vent *Sorry so long*

Posted by jsta76

Posted by bemyyoko

My mom and I love Estelle's. One of the gows i love for myself is under $600 there!! We'll definately be checking there for MOB dresses.

I have a diverse bridal party, so i need to see the dresses on all of the girls before deciding on one. The girls are not all the same race, the same size, or the same age group so I want to make sure it's something everyone is comfortable with.


I love Estelles too, they have so much there and most at really great prices. I got a dress there close to 10 years ago and i can't tell you how many times I've worn it.


have you been there more recently? the place is totally differant!
missK Posted:

Re: Need to Vent *Sorry so long*

Oh sweetie Its tough to have something so important to you and not have everyone feel the same way. Stay strong. Get the dress that you love. Even if it means you have to look by yourself. Do the research and then bring someone or a few whenyou know. It s ucks I know.
Dress shopping has been the single most stressful thing so far and i think i made a hasty decision making a deposit cause everyone I was with said it looked great. I wasnt in tears either more like numb. I hope it works out for you.
jsta76 Posted:

Re: Need to Vent *Sorry so long*

Posted by bemyyoko
have you been there more recently? the place is totally differant!


I know, I can't believe how much 'trendy' stuff they have now. It's soooo much more than dresses now. I think the last time I was there was last summer when I was looking for dresses for friends weddings.

It's really pot luck there though. I just hate going in prom season its a madhouse.

I might take my mom and sister there to look at dresses so they can get an idea. Plus, I want to look at veils.
bemyyoko Posted:

Re: Need to Vent *Sorry so long*

Posted by jsta76

Posted by bemyyoko
have you been there more recently? the place is totally differant!


I know, I can't believe how much 'trendy' stuff they have now. It's soooo much more than dresses now. I think the last time I was there was last summer when I was looking for dresses for friends weddings.

It's really pot luck there though. I just hate going in prom season its a madhouse.

I might take my mom and sister there to look at dresses so they can get an idea. Plus, I want to look at veils.


This Ebay Seller has GREAT veils and GREAT prices
Kurtsk8 Posted:

Re: Need to Vent *Sorry so long*

I'm sorry you're feeling this way, but I feel your pain. My mom straight out told me that everyone has more important things goin on than MY wedding, so she told me not to expect too much from anyone... I was like okay coooool!! thanks!
So i feel your pain, it *****, but in the end it's you and your FH and that's all that really matters!!!
Feel better!
Mizzdimple Posted:

Re: Need to Vent *Sorry so long*

Sorry you feel this way IMO...do everything on your own and try not to include anyone!

jsta76 Posted:

Re: Need to Vent *Sorry so long*

Posted by Kurtsk8

I'm sorry you're feeling this way, but I feel your pain. My mom straight out told me that everyone has more important things goin on than MY wedding, so she told me not to expect too much from anyone... I was like okay coooool!! thanks!
So i feel your pain, it *****, but in the end it's you and your FH and that's all that really matters!!!
Feel better!


Wow that's harsh. I can't believe she said that. I know everyone has stuff going on but still.

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