Need to Vent *Sorry so long*

Let me start by saying that I just got stood up by my own parents.
We were supposed to go to the beach to get their parking permit and then my mom and I were going to go look at wedding gowns. I still have to get to the Macy's in Smithhaven because I have to get my money back. But my mom wants me to try the gown on in front of her so she can see how it looks before i make a final decision.

Fine... even though i know i hate that dress and the more i think about it the more upset i get. I'm paying for the gown myself, and if I don't get there by next Saturday I'm out the deposit I made on it, so I'll end up keeping a gown I hate because I cant afford to lose the money even if it is only $100

So, yea they stood me up so we're not going. I figured that's fine because my ex-SIL is supposed to call me today to go with her daughters to start looking at dresses for them since they are my JBM's. She hasnt called, so i call her and she's not home.

My MOH is busy. She's always busy. and my other BM lives in queens and is impossible to meet up with.

I feel like this wedding doesnt matter to anyone other than me. I don't expect people to drop what they are doing and come when I snap my fingers. However, I've been trying to get everyone on the same page for months now.
I am 9 months out... with no idea what kind of gown to get. This eliminates certain designers who I was told i would have to pay rush fees to get after 10months.
I can't pick the BM dresses untill I pick a style of wedding gown for myself. I'd rather not get their dresses at all untill i have mine finalized but that doesnt seem possible.

I'm so close to just canceling the whole thing and going to town hall next week. I found an adorable white sundress that i could wear, and FH has a suit that will work just fine.

Isnt getting a gown supposed to be the best part aside from the actual getting married part?
The gowns are making me cry... but not in the way they are supposed to.

Sorry ladies... i know this was rather bratty.
I'm just sorta sick of feeling invisible.

Looks like you need a few of these. I know how you feel - I sometimes feel the same way myself... you'll be fine though and it will all work out

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Posted by DGoldfarb0776


Looks like you need a few of these. I know how you feel - I sometimes feel the same way myself... you'll be fine though and it will all work out

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aww thank you. yea i could use a few hugs. it's been such an awsome week, and i know everything will work out... i just wish they would work out the way i want them to you know?

i get so jealous of the girls who are super close friends with their bridal party and who's moms and fmil's are excited for them and helpful. that's the way it's supposed to be....

wow i feel your pain, i only have one friend who actually cares and helps me. I had to beg my mom to go gown shopping with me. I dont think she likes to go. But i finally choose a gown.

Most of my BM's could give 2 shitts less about my wedding, its sad but true.

it really sucksss

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Posted by TheFutureMrsM

wow i feel your pain, i only have one friend who actually cares and helps me. I had to beg my mom to go gown shopping with me. I dont think she likes to go. But i finally choose a gown.

Most of my BM's could give 2 shitts less about my wedding, its sad but true.

it really sucksss

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yea i'm starting to wish some of the poeple involved would have said No when i asked them.

yea.. sometimes I feel that way too.. about some of my bm's

i know it ***** but take a deep breath and relax!! everything will work out perfect for you. all the thought and planning you have already done you don`t want it to be for nothing so stick to it and don`t just run off to a JoP or anything. my bridesmaids don`t seem to be too into helping either and my mom well she cares but only when it`s convient for her so you aren`t alone!!! good luck!!

Everything will work out ok. I know this gown thing is really upsetting you the most but trust me when you finally find it, you will be sooooo happy. I'm always at Smithhaven mall. I live really close and if you ever need someone for a second opinion just let me know.

i am sorry you feel this way

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Posted by dangell427


i know it ***** but take a deep breath and relax!! everything will work out perfect for you. all the thought and planning you have already done you don`t want it to be for nothing so stick to it and don`t just run off to a JoP or anything. my bridesmaids don`t seem to be too into helping either and my mom well she cares but only when it`s convient for her so you aren`t alone!!! good luck!!

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you're right. i've put a lot of time and money into it already.
My mom cares, but she's ill so she cant really do everything she wants to, so instead of just saying that she gets bitter and resentful and is no fun to be around.

thanks for the hugs. i'm trying to calm down.

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Posted by dream426

I know it seems stressful right now but there will be a day when they will be there. I have had that problem and I just kept saying to myself they have lives also and I can't expect them to come even thought I would set it up weeks in advance..lol Its hard not getting everyone support but eventually everything will get done. Just stay positive and try not to stress. You will find the perfect dress. It is out there. I tried on a million dresses and was so discouraged because there was nothing I liked and finally I put on the one and I knew it. You have to go through a lot to find the one that is perfect. Nothing will compare. Just hang in there. It does get very stressful but like I said it will all work out and come together. Just think positively.

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I'm trying to stay possitive. I know it doesnt sound like it...but i am.
My ex SIL lives in her own world where she's the only one who matters. I feel bad because it's going to come to the point where i have to tell my nieces that they cant be in the bridal party b/c their mother wouldnt help find a dress for them. I wish i could have faith that one day she'd get it together and things would get done, but the past has taught me otherwise.

my MOH tries. and i know she has her own life, as well as my bridesmaid... but i'm really not asking for a lot. one day is all i need. besides, it would be nice to just see either of them, wedding related or not.

i'm freaking out about the gown. i know it's gonna be that i have to settle for a gown and i just don't see the point in a big fancy wedding if i don't love my gown.

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Posted by chrispar

Everything will work out ok. I know this gown thing is really upsetting you the most but trust me when you finally find it, you will be sooooo happy. I'm always at Smithhaven mall. I live really close and if you ever need someone for a second opinion just let me know.

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I may take you up on that! I just need someone who doesnt work there, and who doesnt think it's THEIR wedding to give me an honest opinion on the gown.

thanks

Thank you ladies. I don't know what i'd do without all of you.
All my friends are guys... they think i'm ridiculous for caring about a stupid dress. 'just go buy a white dress who cares??' ugh.

I'm so sorry I hope everything works out!

Aww-im sorry they stood you up . Let them know how you feel. I sorta know where you are coming from with the BP not really 'caring'. My sister (MOH) didn't go with me to look for dresses-she kept cancellng on me so I just went w/ my Mom. And 2 of my BM live out of state. People just don't think sometimes. They just focus on their own little world and don't think of how they effect others. It's not even malicious, but it still *****.

But, keep your head up- you will find the perfect dress and it will work out in the end. Don't let this little let down get to you too much because when you finally find THE dress, you wil be so extatic!

I totally feel your pain! Sometimes I feel like I'm doing this ALL on my own and people only decide to put in their two cents when they have a problem with what I've decided. You should not settle for a dress you hate just b/c of the money and you should not forget the whole thing! Lets have a mall GTG and storm the macys bridal suite and get your $$ back! And know that even if your real-life ppl are gaying out, we're all hear to listen to you vent, fell your pain, and try and make it better. So here is the plan:

1) we TP your parents car
2) we find your MOH and we put a banana cream pie in her face and hang a sign around her that says 'please throw egg mcmuffins at me' and then we set up a camera at a distance to watch ppl do so
3) Please refer to my mall GTG idea
4) We go out and eat fried items and drink liquor

This is a surefire plan to make you feel better and get everyone in line.

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Posted by ChristineAaron08

Aww-im sorry they stood you up . Let them know how you feel. I sorta know where you are coming from with the BP not really 'caring'. My sister (MOH) didn't go with me to look for dresses-she kept cancellng on me so I just went w/ my Mom. And 2 of my BM live out of state. People just don't think sometimes. They just focus on their own little world and don't think of how they effect others. It's not even malicious, but it still *****.

But, keep your head up- you will find the perfect dress and it will work out in the end. Don't let this little let down get to you too much because when you finally find THE dress, you wil be so extatic!

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when i tell them how i feel i get called a selfish brat or a drama queen.
blah.

i'm keepin my fingers crossed about the dress. i just hope i find it in time!

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Posted by Mimacat

I totally feel your pain! Sometimes I feel like I'm doing this ALL on my own and people only decide to put in their two cents when they have a problem with what I've decided. You should not settle for a dress you hate just b/c of the money and you should not forget the whole thing! Lets have a mall GTG and storm the macys bridal suite and get your $$ back! And know that even if your real-life ppl are gaying out, we're all hear to listen to you vent, fell your pain, and try and make it better. So here is the plan:

1) we TP your parents car
2) we find your MOH and we put a banana cream pie in her face and hang a sign around her that says 'please throw egg mcmuffins at me' and then we set up a camera at a distance to watch ppl do so
3) Please refer to my mall GTG idea
4) We go out and eat fried items and drink liquor

This is a surefire plan to make you feel better and get everyone in line.

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i'm all about storming macy's and eating fried things and drinking liquor.
we can even TP my parents car.

but we can leave my MOH out of it. lol she's a good person, just really busy.