Hi all! I ran into a friend of mine the other day and told her that I will be inviting her and her husband to my wedding this June. Problem is she has three kids and does not control them. They basically do whatever they want. When I moved into my first apartment and had brand new furniture, she came over with all three kids and had them eating McDonalds on my freshly cleaned carpets. Then her one kid who had a cold wiped snot on my pillows, which are spot clean only. I was soooo mad!!!!!!!!! I would never do that if I had kids!
Anyway, I would love for her to come to my wedding, but how do I let people know that I do not want kids there without hurt feelings. My reasons for this are 1.) We cannot afford to pay $50 a head for kids and 2.) I do not want screaming children ruining our vows. I was just at my cousin's wedding and as they were saying their vows, her 11/2 year old nephew (not a member of the wedding party) was pitching a fit and you could not even hear the bride and groom!!
I told my friend that I hope she is not offended, but we are not having children at the ceremony or reception. My excuse was the money and that we do not have it in our budget for people's children. She promptly replied that she will pay us for them and bring them along. NO WAY! I do not need her kids stepping on my veil and wiping snot on my dress!!!!!!!!! I also do not need them running around the room, knocking stuff over, and screaming at the top of their lungs.
Please help!!!!!
By the way, my other friends have kids that are extremely well behaved, so trust me when I say I do not hate kids and think some of them would be all right. Unfortunately, we really cannot afford to have any of them there, except for those in the bridal party.
Adriana618
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Re: No Kids at My Wedding!
FH and I dont want children at our wedding party... A really close friend of FH has three daughters... youngest is only a few months... I love them dearly but its a totally different party when children...young children/babies are there but his sister's children are twin girls and they are about 9 so they have to come... then i have my two cousins who are the flower girls.... sooooo there are children there, but just them...cause if you start making exceptions for certain kids then you have to intvite everyone, and thats crazyness...in my opinion
kkss1419
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Re: No Kids at My Wedding!
We went through this as well. FHs family didn't quite understand the 'no children' idea until I explained that if we invited children from his side (there aren't many) I would have to invite my side as well, which is about 30 under the age of 12! We decided to include his sister's children in the wedding party along with my son and FH's daughter. As far as we are concerned this solved the issue. No one under 16 is invited with the exception of the BP.
mariaobride
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Re: No Kids at My Wedding!
As the other ladies mentioned you should put on the invitation Adult Reception and if she asks again tell her you & FH request there will be no children there (those are your wishes bottom line). It isn't up to her to negoitate with you.
I love children but the only children that are invited are our nephews we wanted it to be more of a adult celebration.
Snowflake08
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Re: No Kids at My Wedding!
you could do the adult reception thing as other people mentioned, but most people SHOULD know when the invite is only addressed to them
Snowflake08
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Re: No Kids at My Wedding!
Posted by MPAS
I am having kids at my weddings. Kids are the life of the party and they are human beings. My parents took me and my 2 sisters to every event when we were younger. If I dont have my little cousins or nephew at my wedding , then what the point. They are a big part of me and my big day.
same here we have one table of our nieces and nephews - between the ages of 5 and 12 there are about 10 of them and then another table of 16-21 year olds
beachprincess
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Re: No Kids at My Wedding!
Thanks for the responses everyone!
ChristineAaron08
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Re: No Kids at My Wedding!
From what I hear, you need to cover all bases on this situation b/c people just dont listen for beans!
Tell her that you are not having kids, not only b/c $, but you dont want ppl on FHs side bringing kids so it would put you in a bad position to heve hers there.
Also do the 'adult reception' on the invite thing.
And the 'X # of places have been reserved in your honor' on the response card.
I just dont understand why people wouldnt want to have a night out without their kids. I know a ot of parents who would kill for that.
Good Luck!!
TheFutureMrsM
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Re: No Kids at My Wedding!
I do not want kids at my wedding
ALL the weddings i have been to recently that allowed kids, were disasters. The weddings were LATE nite weddings ending after midnite The kids were so wound up. During the Vows, they were totalyl ruined because both weddings the kids carried on uncontrolably no one could hear a thing.
And also during the speeches, it was a nitemare, Its just so convienient that the kids carried on so much when it was supposed to be quiet. We missed both speeches at both weddings because that is when the kids had tantrums and the adults did not remove them.
I do not blame you one bit for not wanting kids
Snowflake08
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Re: No Kids at My Wedding!
well, its a shame that so many people seem to lack parenting skills or knowledge of how to control their children
i wouldnt dream of having my day without my nieces and nephews there to share in the joy however, i am having a babysitter sit at the table with them and/or bring them to the hotel if they have had enough
Mizzdimple
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Re: No Kids at My Wedding!
Tell her that she cant bring and pay for her kids b/c then other parents that have kids will see that her kids are there and its not fair.
No kids across the board.
As far as the church (if you are getting married in one) You cant prevent kids from being there during the ceremony - everyone is welcome.
Julybride08
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Re: No Kids at My Wedding!
I agree with the other girls. on the invitation just put 'ADULT RECEPTION'. And that should solve it. I am doing the same on mine.,
kslmbuggie
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Re: No Kids at My Wedding!
Dont make money an issue as to why u dont want to invite kids. Be honest with people & just tell them you do not want any children there, it is an adult wedding & reception.
nifheim
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Re: No Kids at My Wedding!
Honestly I am not putting adult reception or anything but if you see a problem in the future deff. do it. But on my respons cards i have a blank spot of then a printed number (mostly 2). If they cross it out and write something else then I will have to call them.
My cousin called up my mom and mentiond about the wedding and she asked if her kids were invited and my mom said no. She didn't get into it until my cousin just asked out of curiousity why? and my mom replied she doesn't have a seperate area that she can sit them all together and have a sitter (no extra seperate room for this at my catering hall) my cousin is like oh cool - glad i asked this way i can tell (my other cousins) so we can see if we can drop them off at the inlaws for the night.
See no biggie! Why? Because its honestly not fun to have your kids at a wedding! Hahahah
Wedding999
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Re: No Kids at My Wedding!
It is your day and you have the right to determine who you want invited. Instead of staying the money is the issue - you should tell your friend that you cannot ivite children b/c if you invite one persons kids then you would have to invite everyones kids - and that would put you over the allowed number at your venue.
ant n tilde
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Re: No Kids at My Wedding!
Posted by Snowflake08
well, its a shame that so many people seem to lack parenting skills or knowledge of how to control their children
i wouldnt dream of having my day without my nieces and nephews there to share in the joy however, i am having a babysitter sit at the table with them and/or bring them to the hotel if they have had enough
as you know, i totally agree with you on this one. . . i am not having a babysitter though bc i feel their parents should be able to handle them. and i am so excited to have them there!
PeterNina Mom
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Re: No Kids at My Wedding!
Posted by beachprincess
Hi all! I ran into a friend of mine the other day and told her that I will be inviting her and her husband to my wedding this June. Problem is she has three kids and does not control them. They basically do whatever they want. When I moved into my first apartment and had brand new furniture, she came over with all three kids and had them eating McDonalds on my freshly cleaned carpets. Then her one kid who had a cold wiped snot on my pillows, which are spot clean only. I was soooo mad!!!!!!!!! I would never do that if I had kids!
Anyway, I would love for her to come to my wedding, but how do I let people know that I do not want kids there without hurt feelings. My reasons for this are 1.) We cannot afford to pay $50 a head for kids and 2.) I do not want screaming children ruining our vows. I was just at my cousin's wedding and as they were saying their vows, her 11/2 year old nephew (not a member of the wedding party) was pitching a fit and you could not even hear the bride and groom!!
I told my friend that I hope she is not offended, but we are not having children at the ceremony or reception. My excuse was the money and that we do not have it in our budget for people's children. She promptly replied that she will pay us for them and bring them along. NO WAY! I do not need her kids stepping on my veil and wiping snot on my dress!!!!!!!!! I also do not need them running around the room, knocking stuff over, and screaming at the top of their lungs.
Please help!!!!!
By the way, my other friends have kids that are extremely well behaved, so trust me when I say I do not hate kids and think some of them would be all right. Unfortunately, we really cannot afford to have any of them there, except for those in the bridal party.
Hey Beachprincess.....just tell her exactly what you said that you are not inviting children to the wedding. Tell her it is too expensive, which it is, and leave it at that. You have the right to have an adults only wedding if you wish and no one can tell you differently. I know you have a nephew so you can explain (before she says something about him) that the only child that will be there is your nephew.
P.S. Did your mom tell you that my wedding anniversary is June 21st too?
