So every year in August we all (FHs whole family and me the last few years) do a walk for pancreatic cancer in memory of FH;s grandfather. Its VERY early in the morning but we suck it up and all go. Ok so we just moved. Like, are still moving and have been all week. After we booked our move and everything FMIL is like 'oh yeah the walk is early this year its July 25th'. So I told FH we just can;t do it this year. We'll make a donation but we are MOVING and she only told us a few days ago about it and we are exhausted. So he is like 'I know I know but my mom is upset'. I'm sorry I feel badly but I have been moving all week, ALLL day today and we aren't done and we have more to do. I'm not getting up at 7am on the Sunday right after we move, if she had told us earlier (which she knew it was because she registered all of us ages ago) we could have changed our move to next week (we still have our old place until August 1st). I really don't think I'm that wrong in this....???
JLWSJC
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Re: NWR but FIL related- am I wrong?
You're not, but she's never going to see it that way. What if FH went and you stayed home to 'unpack and set up the house' read: sleep in THEN unpack?
jhines4684
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Re: NWR but FIL related- am I wrong?
would she be upset if you were sick and couldn't come? moving takes a lot of people, she should understand, especially if you are willing to make a donation.
MerSaysEh
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Re: NWR but FIL related- am I wrong?
totally thought of that. going to suggest it to FH if he brings it up with me again
Gerbera
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Re: NWR but FIL related- am I wrong?
Don't hate me OK? This is just my opinion.
If it were me I would still go. That's just my opinion. Because if you guys do this every year you could've just as easily found out when it is this year. I know she's partially at fault for not telling you earlier. But it's possible she might've assumed you already knew because you guys do it every year.
I guess for me at the end of the day you guys do this every year in memory of the grandfather. I would just tough through it and do it.
What does your FI think? Regardless of whether your future mother in law would be upset or not. Does he think it's important that the two of you show up for the walk? Or is he OK with just doing a donation this year?
Hope it works out!
flibbertigibbet
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Re: NWR but FIL related- am I wrong?
I'd go wherever your FH goes but that's just because I want to see the man work up a sweat and hopefully take his shirt off.
JAAMS
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Re: NWR but FIL related- am I wrong?
Posted by Gerbera
Don't hate me OK? This is just my opinion.
If it were me I would still go. That's just my opinion. Because if you guys do this every year you could've just as easily found out when it is this year. I know she's partially at fault for not telling you earlier. But it's possible she might've assumed you already knew because you guys do it every year.
I guess for me at the end of the day you guys do this every year in memory of the grandfather. I would just tough through it and do it.
What does your FI think? Regardless of whether your future mother in law would be upset or not. Does he think it's important that the two of you show up for the walk? Or is he OK with just doing a donation this year?
Hope it works out!
I agree. I don't mean it in an offensive way. However, I think it's in the memory of a person who has passed, and a time for everyone to band together. That's just how I would feel though.
NanandEric08
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Re: NWR but FIL related- am I wrong?
I can totally understand where you are coming from with being exhausted but if I was in your situation, I would probably still go. I know its a lot and I am sure its going to be a pain with everything you have going on but if it means that much to them, I would probably suck it up.