Sounds like you already made up your mind about this friend. And like they always say, when you plan a wedding you see people's true colors. Keep smiling!
adelz
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Member since
Re: NWR: What would you do? Kinda long...
Posted by FutureMRS.Benn
Sounds like you already made up your mind about this friend. And like they always say, when you plan a wedding you see people's true colors. Keep smiling!
You're right - I totally did, but I can't decide if I want to tell her why I can't be her friend anymore, or just to continue ignoring her.
Jennielee15
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Re: NWR: What would you do? Kinda long...
I would stop ignoring her and tell her how you feel. Explain your not mad just hurt.
FutureMRS.Benn
Posted:
Member since
Re: NWR: What would you do? Kinda long...
Posted by adelz
Posted by FutureMRS.Benn
Sounds like you already made up your mind about this friend. And like they always say, when you plan a wedding you see people's true colors. Keep smiling!
You're right - I totally did, but I can't decide if I want to tell her why I can't be her friend anymore, or just to continue ignoring her.
Tell her she hurt your feelings and then see what happens. If she values your friendship then maybe she will surprise you.
FDNYwife1029
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Re: NWR: What would you do? Kinda long...
This really depends how important the friendship is to you. If it's important to you - just talk to her. Communication is so important... Ignoring her is not the way to go. Sit her down & have a heart to heart .. tell her your feelings... & how much it hurt you that she didn't really share your special day with you.
if that's doesn't work then go your separate ways and at least you know deep down you tried.
HTH!
FDNYwife1029
Posted:
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Re: NWR: What would you do? Kinda long...
Just keep in mind, when people are going thru really tough times, it's hard for them to think about other people. Maybe she has more on her plate than you think/know.
Cataverri
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Re: NWR: What would you do? Kinda long...
I say have a conversation with her face to face maybe invite her over...dont ignore her! Hopefully everything can be solved and she can see her mistakes...sometimes we dont see our mistakes until someone else points them out. So it could be she did them unintentionally.
MarryingMyBFF1110
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Re: NWR: What would you do? Kinda long...
End it and tell her why. Not that long ago I had a bff who 'ended it' with me via facebook, no explanation. I 99.9% know the reason why and it makes me laugh (besides the fact that she became psychotic, I am not the type of person to lie and she was tired of hearing the truth about her 'relationships' which existed only in her head..7 years of make believe is enough for me!) BUT she never had the balls to tell me to my face why she was 'breaking up with me'. You are completely in the right, so just let her know, that way she won't have to wonder what she did, and she'll know for sure. lol.
rosatemp
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Member since
Re: NWR: What would you do? Kinda long...
Posted by FutureMRS.Benn
Sounds like you already made up your mind about this friend. And like they always say, when you plan a wedding you see people's true colors. Keep smiling!
ITA..
MNM0805
Posted:
Member since
Re: NWR: What would you do? Kinda long...
Posted by Cataverri
I say have a conversation with her face to face maybe invite her over...dont ignore her! Hopefully everything can be solved and she can see her mistakes...sometimes we dont see our mistakes until someone else points them out. So it could be she did them unintentionally.
THis^
chilly313
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Member since
Re: NWR: What would you do? Kinda long...
I would definitely say something to her. I would let her know that you are hurt by her actions and because of that you don't feel that you can be there for her the way you have been in the past. Not that it has to be a big confrontation, but you really have nothing to lose since you don't want her in you life anymore anyway.
VCanizalez
Posted:
Member since
Re: NWR: What would you do? Kinda long...
Posted by FutureMRS.Benn
Sounds like you already made up your mind about this friend. And like they always say, when you plan a wedding you see people's true colors. Keep smiling!
YUP!!!!!
ITA^
ColliMac23
Posted:
Member since
Re: NWR: What would you do? Kinda long...
I had to do this with a girl who was in my Bridal Party! She texted me a week after I got home like 'Hey your home?' and I ignored it and haven't talked to her since my Wedding Day. Sometimes saying nothing says everything. No need to explain yourself, she prob already knows why your mad and is trying to make everything alright because your the only one who has been there. It's up to you but by acknowledging her lets her know that your still there. I guess I am a little more harsh because I am in the same situation but it's gone on long enough and I am done so really it's do what you want just be guarded.
JLWSJC
Posted:
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Re: NWR: What would you do? Kinda long...
Posted by Jennielee15
I would stop ignoring her and tell her how you feel. Explain your not mad just hurt.
This. I'd write her an email and explain to her that you've tried to be there for everything she needs and that she and her family were important enough to you to invite to your wedding and you felt like she blew it off, which hurt you. I'd make it very short, very condensed, very matter of fact.
It's unfortunate, but some people just need more help than one other person can give and it starts to become draining. Totally understandable.
I wonder if her husband is controlling or abusive or anything like that though, maybe he hadmore influence over her about going to the wedding than he should have?
ItalianBella1122
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Member since
Re: NWR: What would you do? Kinda long...
I have had a friend who is like this...will only call me for advice or when they need to talk about something, but never once do they reach their hand out to me, and I started to feel used after a while. They'd call me on all my phone numbers, IM me, whatever until they tracked me down. While we are still friends, we only talk occasionally now and I've made it clear that I can't be the 24 hour advice line anymore. I came to realize that we weren't really friends....I was the counselor and they were the patient. And it was a toxic friendship.
That being said, I would reach out to her and let her know that you were hurt, especially since you have been such a good friend to her. Be honest with her and let her know what you told us. If there is something going on, she might open up to you. If she just says she was busy that day then maybe you will be busy next time she calls.
