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~*~*~*~Ofiicial 08 jewish brides//Checklist~*~*~*~

Original post by jsta76

Since Michelle mentioned there is no official list I figured we could start one. If anyone has any questions/concerns/comments, feel free to ask.

I know there is the mainstream checklist out there but I'm trying to figure out what else we might need for a religious ceremony. I know there is so many things and I don't want to forget anything.

Rabbi/Cantor
Talit
Hebrew names
Kiddush cup
White wine (so you don't spill on dress)
Chupah
Kippahs (yarmulke)/clips/bobbie pins
Ketubah
Glass , bag and some kind of keepsake
Plain wedding band
Challah
Broom or flowered headpiece for mazhinka
Benchers (prayer books)
Vows

Am I forgetting anything?

Here's a pretty good site I found also.

Link

I will update the list if anyone thinks of something I might be forgetting. I figured this would be good for future reference.

Another idea to add to our list, where are you getting everything?

***********************UPDATE**********************
Ok so we met with our rabbi today ...it was an ummmm interesting experience since he has NO clue who I am but I digress. We had no idea what to expect and FH kept on asking me if it would be like the Robin Williams movie License to Wed LMOA.

He suggested us both 'borrowing' rings from family members because it would make them feel inlcluded which was a really nice thought.

Something to keep in mind that we didn't know about...you need to have ALL Hebrew names, myself, FH. my parents and FIL's. Also, our witness's including their fathers.

He requested 2 kiddush cups but i'm not certain why.

Oh and he talked about the auf ruf (no clue how to spell). When I talked to my parents they said that wanted to host one so that will happen the Friday before the wedding.

Something else I learned was that we could write our own vows! I didn't think that was even possible. It's not something i've really seen t other weddings. Unfortunately FH doesn't want to do it.

Plus everything else on this list as well.
SoontobeMrsH Posted:

Re: Checklist for the Jewish Bride

Thanks! We're Reform too, FH grew up conservative, but when I researched I choose Reform. Oh, I actually registered for the mezuzah . I also registered for a Kiddish cup & Menorah. A Talit is pronunced Tallis? Gottcha, my Hebrew is weak, I struggle & my yiddish is worse. After I convert I'm going to take enrichment classes to learn both... If you don't mind me asking... What Congregation do you belong too. We're joining JCB.That's where we celebrated the new year with & that is where we'll go for Yom Kippor Services. Our Rabbi's wife is also a Rabbi, she's at a Congregation in the town where your parents live
SB7308 Posted:

Re: Checklist for the Jewish Bride

Anyone going to the Mikvah before their wedding?

SoontobeMrsH Posted:

Re: Checklist for the Jewish Bride

Posted by SB7308

Anyone going to the Mikvah before their wedding?



you too? Where are you taking classes? Well I'm not sure if I'll finish my classes before or after the ceremony, but I'm on my way there...................
SB7308 Posted:

Re: Checklist for the Jewish Bride

Posted by perfectpair

Posted by SB7308

Anyone going to the Mikvah before their wedding?



you too? Where are you taking classes? Well I'm not sure if I'll finish my classes before or after the ceremony, but I'm on my way there...................

I dont know if I am going to go yet.. The Rabbi would 'prefer' I did lol.. What classes? Im not taking any classes-should I be? lol
Toucan311 Posted:

Re: Checklist for the Jewish Bride

I saw someone with a Mets Yarmulka at a game, and I thought it was lovely.

SB7308 Posted:

Re: Checklist for the Jewish Bride

Posted by Mimacat

I saw someone with a Mets Yarmulka at a game, and I thought it was lovely.

FH is wearing his yankee yarmulka at our wedding
jsta76 Posted:

Re: Checklist for the Jewish Bride

Posted by perfectpair

Thanks! We're Reform too, FH grew up conservative, but when I researched I choose Reform. Oh, I actually registered for the mezuzah . I also registered for a Kiddish cup & Menorah. A Talit is pronunced Tallis? Gottcha, my Hebrew is weak, I struggle & my yiddish is worse. After I convert I'm going to take enrichment classes to learn both... If you don't mind me asking... What Congregation do you belong too. We're joining JCB.That's where we celebrated the new year with & that is where we'll go for Yom Kippor Services. Our Rabbi's wife is also a Rabbi, she's at a Congregation in the town where your parents live


Yes Talit/Tallis is the same thing. You probably know more Hebrew than me at this point LOL. I only know a small spattering of words. I never quite understood the fact that they teach you the basics but not to understand what you are saying. I can read and write, but don't ask me what i'm saying. And that's WITH taking a semester in college. I know almost no Yiddush.

What does JCB stand for? I'm not familiar, though i'm guessing Jericho something.

I grew up and i'm technically still a member at Temple Beth Torah. Again when we buy a house, I told FH its important that we join someplace out here.
jsta76 Posted:

Re: ~*~Ofiicial 08 jewish brides/Checklist for the Jewish Bride~*~*

Changed the name and bumping.

PreshusSmurf Posted:

Re: ~*~Ofiicial 08 jewish brides/Checklist for the Jewish Bride~*~*

This is a great thread

tlp123 Posted:

Re: ~*~Ofiicial 08 jewish brides/Checklist for the Jewish Bride~*~*

Posted by SB7308

Anyone going to the Mikvah before their wedding?


Oh my goodness, the mikvah! I forgot all about it.

I was raised pretty religious, but i really don't do much with religion these days. I have actually been postponing calling my rabbi b/c i am embarrassed to admit that I am not so religious anymore. I guess I have to su ck it up though b/c the wedding is coming soon!
Munchkn16 Posted:

Re: ~*~Ofiicial 08 jewish brides/Checklist for the Jewish Bride~*~*

we have to keep this thread going!

I think I want to go to the mikvah before my wedding. The idea sounds kind of ridiculous to most peple I know, b/c FH and I live together and I wasn't raised religious at all...but I really want to go.

How do I find one? Do I have to be a member of the synagogue to use it, or can I just mae an appointment?

jsta76 Posted:

Re: ~*~Ofiicial 08 jewish brides/Checklist for the Jewish Bride~*~*

Posted by tlp123

Posted by SB7308

Anyone going to the Mikvah before their wedding?


Oh my goodness, the mikvah! I forgot all about it.

I was raised pretty religious, but i really don't do much with religion these days. I have actually been postponing calling my rabbi b/c i am embarrassed to admit that I am not so religious anymore. I guess I have to su ck it up though b/c the wedding is coming soon!


I don't know if I have to do that tho I have no clue. Sadly we haven't even met with the rabbi yet. I introduced FH to him after Rosh Hashana services but I don't think we're meeting with him until sometime in Dec/Jan.
SoontobeMrsH Posted:

Re: ~*~Ofiicial 08 jewish brides/Checklist for the Jewish Bride~*~*

Posted by jsta76

Posted by perfectpair

Thanks! We're Reform too, FH grew up conservative, but when I researched I choose Reform. Oh, I actually registered for the mezuzah . I also registered for a Kiddish cup & Menorah. A Talit is pronunced Tallis? Gottcha, my Hebrew is weak, I struggle & my yiddish is worse. After I convert I'm going to take enrichment classes to learn both... If you don't mind me asking... What Congregation do you belong too. We're joining JCB.That's where we celebrated the new year with & that is where we'll go for Yom Kippor Services. Our Rabbi's wife is also a Rabbi, she's at a Congregation in the town where your parents live


Yes Talit/Tallis is the same thing. You probably know more Hebrew than me at this point LOL. I only know a small spattering of words. I never quite understood the fact that they teach you the basics but not to understand what you are saying. I can read and write, but don't ask me what i'm saying. And that's WITH taking a semester in college. I know almost no Yiddush.

What does JCB stand for? I'm not familiar, though i'm guessing Jericho something.

I grew up and i'm technically still a member at Temple Beth Torah. Again when we buy a house, I told FH its important that we join someplace out here.



JCB - Jewish Congregation of Brookville My Rabbi's Wife is a Rabb in Dix Hills thought it would be ironic if she was yours
SoontobeMrsH Posted:

Re: ~*~Ofiicial 08 jewish brides/Checklist for the Jewish Bride~*~*

Posted by Munchkn16

we have to keep this thread going!

I think I want to go to the mikvah before my wedding. The idea sounds kind of ridiculous to most peple I know, b/c FH and I live together and I wasn't raised religious at all...but I really want to go.

How do I find one? Do I have to be a member of the synagogue to use it, or can I just mae an appointment?



Mikvah comes after classes, and is a ceremony, I don't think you can just show up. If it were that easy I would have already been FM me if you want info on classes, and as far as I know there are 2 temples on the island with it and a few in Manhattan
lyss0908 Posted:

Re: ~*~Ofiicial 08 jewish brides/Checklist for the Jewish Bride~*~*

OMG thank god for this thread! I know I have a year to go, but there are so many things I never thought of until this list! Thank you!

also- i know I already started a chat on it, but if anyone can reccomend a rabbi/cantor please FM me. Also- was wondering the 'going rate'. My family left our congregation and joined a new one, but that rabbi wants 1200 to perfom our ceremony!
jsta76 Posted:

Re: ~*~Ofiicial 08 jewish brides/Checklist for the Jewish Bride~*~*

Posted by perfectpair

Posted by jsta76

Posted by perfectpair

Thanks! We're Reform too, FH grew up conservative, but when I researched I choose Reform. Oh, I actually registered for the mezuzah . I also registered for a Kiddish cup & Menorah. A Talit is pronunced Tallis? Gottcha, my Hebrew is weak, I struggle & my yiddish is worse. After I convert I'm going to take enrichment classes to learn both... If you don't mind me asking... What Congregation do you belong too. We're joining JCB.That's where we celebrated the new year with & that is where we'll go for Yom Kippor Services. Our Rabbi's wife is also a Rabbi, she's at a Congregation in the town where your parents live


Yes Talit/Tallis is the same thing. You probably know more Hebrew than me at this point LOL. I only know a small spattering of words. I never quite understood the fact that they teach you the basics but not to understand what you are saying. I can read and write, but don't ask me what i'm saying. And that's WITH taking a semester in college. I know almost no Yiddush.

What does JCB stand for? I'm not familiar, though i'm guessing Jericho something.

I grew up and i'm technically still a member at Temple Beth Torah. Again when we buy a house, I told FH its important that we join someplace out here.



JCB - Jewish Congregation of Brookville My Rabbi's Wife is a Rabb in Dix Hills thought it would be ironic if she was yours


I thought we kinda figured out that she was! We've had a female rabbi for a few years at our congregation but her name escapes me right now.
jsta76 Posted:

Re: ~*~Ofiicial 08 jewish brides/Checklist for the Jewish Bride~*~*

Posted by lyss0908

OMG thank god for this thread! I know I have a year to go, but there are so many things I never thought of until this list! Thank you!

also- i know I already started a chat on it, but if anyone can reccomend a rabbi/cantor please FM me. Also- was wondering the 'going rate'. My family left our congregation and joined a new one, but that rabbi wants 1200 to perfom our ceremony!


Honestly that sounds like a lot to me.

Our temple doesn't have a fee persay but they ask for a 'donation' to the temple.

My sister had a cantor for her ceremony about 5 years ago and i think he charged her around $500 If you'd like I can find out his name? (She didn't go with our rabbi because her hubby isn't jewish, he wouldn't marry them. )
nycerika318 Posted:

Re: ~*~Ofiicial 08 jewish brides/Checklist for the Jewish Bride~*~*

I just got married at Temple Beth-El in Great Neck. They were amazing and the temple was gorgeous! If you are getting married at a temple, they will provide the yarmulkes and the glass that gets broken in a ceremony. I think my caterer used a light bulb because it makes a louder pop when FH crushes it.

It seems like your list is pretty comprehensive. I don't even know if I had all of the items on the list. One thing I would suggest you do is write your own vows, in addition to your hebrew vows. We did this, and it really added a lot to our ceremony. After the ceremony, guests kept coming up to us and saying it was one of the most romantic ceremonies they had ever been to.
jsta76 Posted:

Re: ~*~Ofiicial 08 jewish brides/Checklist for the Jewish Bride~*~*

Posted by nycerika318

I just got married at Temple Beth-El in Great Neck. They were amazing and the temple was gorgeous! If you are getting married at a temple, they will provide the yarmulkes and the glass that gets broken in a ceremony. I think my caterer used a light bulb because it makes a louder pop when FH crushes it.

It seems like your list is pretty comprehensive. I don't even know if I had all of the items on the list. One thing I would suggest you do is write your own vows, in addition to your hebrew vows. We did this, and it really added a lot to our ceremony. After the ceremony, guests kept coming up to us and saying it was one of the most romantic ceremonies they had ever been to.


I would have liked to but FH doesn't want to write our own vows....I think he's afraid that he would be at a loss of words.
jsta76 Posted:

Re: ~*~Ofiicial 08 jewish brides/Checklist for the Jewish Bride~*~*

We went shopping today and went to Chai and Mazel in Commack. We were thinking about checking out Zion Lion as well this week.

We need ideas for Ketubah and everything else.

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