Okay, ettiquette question...UPDATED!

We live in an apartment, and UPS doesn't leave packages at the door. So we got a slip on our door saying that a package from BB&B is being delivered tomorrow. I didn't order anything from them, so it is likely a shower gift, since mine is April 30th. So my quesiton is: should I open the gift and send a thank you right away, or wait until the shower? Since the shower is OOT (8 hrs away), I can't bring the gift with me. I would just have to open it at home later after the shower. What do you think?

UPDATE:

Well, it's my blue blender! No, I didn't open it. It was on the packing slip. I just put it in my closet.I don't know, the whole shower thing with my mom...I don't want to rock the boat and cause any more arguing than there has been. Maybe if she calls me soon (she should be getting the invitation tomorrow) I'll tell her about the gift and see what she thinks.

Re: Okay, ettiquette question...

dont send the thank you letter untill the end of the shower . act surprized and happy enjoy

Re: Okay, ettiquette question...

I would say open it and send a thank you note. That way she knows before the shower you recieved her gift and loved it and she wont feel uncomfotable at the shower. Plus, you cant bring it with you any way.

Re: Okay, ettiquette question...

---

Posted by chapel06

I would say open it and send a thank you note. That way she knows before the shower you recieved her gift and loved it and she wont feel uncomfotable at the shower. Plus, you cant bring it with you any way.

---

What if the gift is from someone who can't make the shower?

Re: Okay, ettiquette question...

open it and send a thank you. She might get nervous it didnt get delivered if she doesnt hear from you.

Re: Okay, ettiquette question...

OPEN IT NOW. Thank the person at the shower and send the thank you after the shower with the rest of the thank yous.

Re: Okay, ettiquette question...

Keep in mind that the person who sent this may get a receipt back that it was shipped and received by you. It's okay to open the gift and send a thank you right away - or you can open the gift, call the person and say thank you and then when you come back from the shower, send all the thank you's out together.

Re: Okay, ettiquette question...

I would say you can open it, and I would also send a thank you card right away.

Re: Okay, ettiquette question...

I would still say open it and send a thank you right away, so she knows you got the gift.

Re: Okay, ettiquette question...

I had something similar happen to me too, Beth. I gave the gift to my mom and she let the sender know that I had gotten it but was waiting til the shower to open it. That way they had piece of mind knowing that it was received OK but knew to wait for the TY til after the shower.

Re: Okay, ettiquette question...

---

Posted by I-can't-wait!!!!!!

I would say you can open it, and I would also send a thank you card right away.

---

I agree. If you were able to bring the gift with you to the shower I would have someone contact her to let her know you got it (like cindyandkevin suggested) but since you can't, I would open it now and send a thank you.

Re: Okay, ettiquette question...

---

Posted by cindyandkevin

I had something similar happen to me too, Beth. I gave the gift to my mom and she let the sender know that I had gotten it but was waiting til the shower to open it. That way they had piece of mind knowing that it was received OK but knew to wait for the TY til after the shower.

---

Aw, but I want to open it! Plus, should I really take it 8 hours to Massachusetts just so I can open it there? I'd just rather wait and open it in MD after shower. But REALLY I'd like to open it in MD today Who knows...I'm at work right now and FH is working from home waiting for the package. When I finish my labwork, I'll go home and switch with him, depending on if he gets the package before 1:30 this afternoon.

Re: Okay, ettiquette question...

If you open the shipping box, there is a good chance that the gift is gift-wrapped. My calphalon pots were shipped and they came in a HUGE box, but the calphalon box was wrapped in a large gift bag. There was a card with the gift as well.

You can read the card to see who it's from (and then read the packing slip to see what it is!). You can also have your mom or someone else let the sender know you received the gift but are waiting until after your shower to open it.

Re: Okay, ettiquette question...

I say open it and send a thank you card...Most likely the person is unable to attend the shower.

Re: Okay, ettiquette question...

Open and acknowledge it with a thank you.

Re: Okay, ettiquette question...

ok so I had a few variations someone attending that didn't want to carry a big gift form Manhattan to LI, someone who made a mistake and shipped to me, someone who couldn't make it to the shower and they were sent to my home. We opened right away cause i'm a kid w/ gifts! lol

I called the people to say thank you or my mom let them know it arrived. I am sending the Thank You note with all of the ones form my shower because that was what the gift was intended for. I refused to take those gifts w/ me to the shower! I did this for my sister's last year also. It saved a lot of room by leaving some of those presents home thank god! For my shower I also got a photo (again something I did for my sisters shower) in a card of what the gift was because it was too big to carry (my 4 piece luggage set). There's nothing wrong w/ opening and leaving home! It's just practical when traveling.

Re: Okay, ettiquette question...UPDATED!

Bump for update!

Re: Okay, ettiquette question...UPDATED!

I received shower gifts from people who cannot attend and I didn't even know that my shower was coming up.

I opened them and sent a thank you right away, and I just hid things from my mom, she's trying so hard so I didn't want to spoil it for her either.

Re: Okay, ettiquette question...UPDATED!

You're actually supposed to open any gifts shipped to your home right away. The main reason is that the guest should receive a prompt (and specific) thank you note (i.e. 'Thanks for the blender', not 'Thanks for your gift'). The other reason is that you need to make sure that the gift wasn't damaged during shipping. Most stores require you to ship back anything that was damaged during shipping immediately. If you wait to open it, and it's damaged, you might not be able to get a replacement.

Re: Okay, ettiquette question...UPDATED!

we got a gift before the shower and opened it but I did not sent out the thank you untill after the shower