Ok girls. I need some advice. This is kinda personal, but I would like to hear other opinions. Sorry if it's too long. So FH and I are diff religions. His family is very traditional and didn't approve of him dating outside the religion. It wasn't until 4 yrs. into it, that I was allowed to go over his house and to family functions. So now we are engaged, and my parents are happy and I've gotten crads and gifts and just a simple Congradulations from everyone in my family. I haven't gotten any congrats from anyone in his family except from his brother and sis. I have been around aunts and uncles with my ring on and no one has said a word about it, I'm not even sure his whole family knows. This makes me very sad bc I feel like an engagement should be a very happy and special time for girls. I feel ike I am 50% being robbed of this and it bothers me. Fh doesn't understand and he just gets kinda mad when I try to talk to him about it. Fh best friend got engaged on Sat and we went to his bbq yesterday and his (FH best friend) whole family was congradulating her and giving hugs and kisses and being so happy. I am very happy for them, but it also made me feel sad that I couldn't have that from his family. So my question is, what advice do you guys have to kinda get through this without feeling down or let it ruin this experience?
Sweeteey51
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Re: Personal issue, need advice
Wow im sorry to hear that. The best advice is that to just ignore them not everyone will be happy for you in life or anything in general. If they cant be happy for you guys then dont talk about any wedding stuff around them and make them feel left out. And if your hubby gets mad try to explain to him where your coming from, because if he gets mad when express your feelings whats gonna happen when you two get married? Its usually hard when you marry someone of diff religions but only you can decide what situations you can live with.
lanamanitta
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Re: Personal issue, need advice
I have to say, it's a hard situation, but they won't come around on the issue It will always be their excuse if they can't connect with you, even though it's really their lack of understanding and caring about your FH's happiness.
They will have to get used to it, that's it. You have a joyous event to focus on, not to mention the rest of your life.
Mitch
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Re: Personal issue, need advice
Rough Stuff.... I can understand how uncomfortable it must be for you and the only reason why I can think that your fiance gets upset when you try to talk about it, is because it might be a difficult subject to approach....but try not to let it bring you down....obviously, depsite religious beliefs and expectations he still popped the ? and now it's probably all about his family getting used too it....try not to let it bring you down though.....families are tough....there's so much accomodating that goes into everything...even when you have a great family relationship on both sides, you still have conflicts of interest and opinions...all I can say is be the best bride to be you can.....be confidant, beautiful, awesome, smiling, and enjoy YOUR moment...and hopefully the fam will catch on.....hope that helps.
Ann 52409
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Re: Personal issue, need advice
Whether you guys are the same religion or not sometimes as sad as it is not everybody will be happy for you but as long as you and FH know this is the right decision try not to let it bother you too much. I know it is easier said then done.
longislandlibrarian
Posted:
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Re: Personal issue, need advice
I had a friend who went through the same thing marrying into a muslim family, she not muslim herself, It was an extremely difficult situation.. but you are doing all of the right things by including everyone in everything.. eventually as time wore on, they came around...
