I ordered a Demetrios gown from Macy*s in Manhasset. Originally there was a dress in Iman that I loved, but my mom (who's paying) kept pressing that it was too expensive. She wasn't really excited about my engagement or dress shopping with me. My father passed away a few years ago and she just kept saying how hard this was for her to do without him. Anyways, so we went to a few other shops and I wasn't finding anything I liked and she kept complaining that she was sick of looking. So, to make it easier for her I invited one of my BMs to go with me and she freaked that it was the MOB's job and inappropriate for a friend to go, so I canceled with my buddy and we went to Macy*s.
That night I got a dress. I didn't love it, I liked it, but I didn't love it. Problems crept in though when it was ordered. The gown had a champagne sash, which was the accent piece, but my Mom insisted that it be ivory because 'brides wear all white'. So SHE ordered it in ivory. Then as time went on, she was so happy I ordered something, I just kept telling myself that I would like it too, but I didn't.
Ergo my dress poll and comments over the past few days. I wasn't trying to be a debbie downer, and I'm sorry if I came off that way. I was just worried about the dress fitting this weekend.
And then yesterday came. When the woman unzipped the garment bag I burst into tears.
$2500 and I hate it.
Charmaine (the manager of Macy*s) was a doll. She spent probably 3+hours with us trying to help. She offered to add lace to the bottom to even out the look (as of now it's just plain silk) and decrease the sash size so I wouldn't hate it so much .... but needless to say I'm still just so disappointed. They think they can fix it so I like it better, and I hope they're right: the wedding is in May, my options are minimal.
I'm going to attach pictures of the original dress, 2 I took in the fitting room, and a photoshop job I did decreasing the size of the sash to see what it would look like after alterations.
I've been crying nonstop since our appointment at 2pm yesterday (Monday). And to make things worse, my Mom is so angry with me and keeps telling me I need therapy.
So I'm posting this to a) tell girls who are shopping not to settle, find something you love and; b) see if you guys have any suggestions on how to alter the gown or whatever else. I'm the only one of my friends getting married right now and I'm afraid they'll just think I'm bridezilla if I relay this story. I know it's the man, not the gown but who doesn't want to look beautiful on their wedding day?
Thanks for listening
irishsweetheart
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Re: Please Help Me - I HATE MY GOWN
I just wanted to say that I honestly do think your dress is GORGEOUS, but if you're looking to add something to make extra-special I would suggest having them put on some crystals, like some of the other girls metioned.
Ask them to add some to the bodice and if they're adding lace to the bottom I would ask them to add some there too.
Don't worry you are going to look gorgeous regardless.
I'm sorry that you're going through this but it will all be okay in the end!
ETA: You could also definitely add a sparkly brooch in the middle of the sash to jazz it up a little too!
AlliCatB
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Re: Please Help Me - I HATE MY GOWN
Posted by anitsirk46
When I first started reading your post, I thought 'OMG, how bad is this dress?' BUT ITS SO NICE!!!! I think you will be beautiful on your big day...I'm not just saying that. Good luck with everything.[/QUOTE
] oh my God I needed that laugh, thank you!
NowAndForever2012
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Re: Please Help Me - I HATE MY GOWN
beautiful dress
PeterNina Mom
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Re: Please Help Me - I HATE MY GOWN
Posted by DNicholes
IMHO.....I really think your dress is beautiful and I'm not just saying that. Picture yoursef with you hair & make-up done...jewelry on etc...
My one suggestion....maybe get a brooch to go right in the middle of the sash...that way it gives your dress a little sparkle
I agree the dress is beautiful and will look gorgeous when the entire package comes together. I also agree that a small brooch might add that little extra something you may be looking for. Good luck and you are going to be a knock out!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
AlliCatB
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Re: Please Help Me - I HATE MY GOWN
I love those suggestions, and I think you guys are onto something. I didn't want something too too fancy as a gown because I'm pretty preppy and low key with my wardrobe, so just that little sparkle and brooch may be what I need to make me happier.
You guys are awesome, I can't say it enough/
And now I'm much calmer & I don't think I need therapy... I mean who needs therapy when you have LIW.com?
(and for those of you who don't know the punchline to this, I am a therapist, so I'm not antitherapy, I just couldn't believe my Mom thought a therapist would help me like my gown )
chrissyandvin
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Re: Please Help Me - I HATE MY GOWN
I actually love that dress with the champaign sash that's on the model wearing it!! Its a very pretty dress and looks great on you but if you want to add something to it.. why not go with a darker sash like that model has or the broach! But I happen to think the dress looks great on you!!!! I love the lace tops!!
HamptonsBride
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Re: Please Help Me - I HATE MY GOWN
I think the dress looks beautiful on you...and it's a gorgeous gown as is! Sorry you are going thru this...sounds like your mom is the one needing a session or two here, not you...haha..but anyway...here are some pics with a brooch photoshoped on...hope that helps ya!!
I love those suggestions, and I think you guys are onto something. I didn't want something too too fancy as a gown because I'm pretty preppy and low key with my wardrobe, so just that little sparkle and brooch may be what I need to make me happier.
You guys are awesome, I can't say it enough/
And now I'm much calmer & I don't think I need therapy... I mean who needs therapy when you have LIW.com?
(and for those of you who don't know the punchline to this, I am a therapist, so I'm not antitherapy, I just couldn't believe my Mom thought a therapist would help me like my gown )
I'm so happy you feel better and like the brooch idea. Keep us posted and let us see when you add that little sparkle.
KellyS15
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Re: Please Help Me - I HATE MY GOWN
I think it a a gorgeous dress and you look great in it! I hope that the alterations go well. Keep your head up.
MrsQ-in2007
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Re: Please Help Me - I HATE MY GOWN
Quite honestly, I think the dress is gorgeous as it is! I think the only thing is that it's too big on you right now. I also LOVE the idea of adding a brooch, but would go with something smaller than the one that was photoshopped above (although that brooch is soooo pretty!!!).
BUT, it's what you want and what your heart says that truly matters. I don't think it would be too difficult to order the darker sash that you originally loved. If you change the sash and add the brooch, that would be perfect, although I personally think the sash it has now looks great.
Good luck!
ksl268
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Re: Please Help Me - I HATE MY GOWN
I love your dress it's so classic and elegant. You are going to be a beautiful
carolinebr
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Re: Please Help Me - I HATE MY GOWN
Have you had your hair & makeup trial yet? If not, maybe go to Macys afterwards & put the dress on again with your heapiece & all...??? Just an idea.
mskittynj
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Re: Please Help Me - I HATE MY GOWN
OK here is my honest opinion....And it's coming from a person who is NOT in love with her dress. I understand how you feel. You DO NOT need therapy. It was not nice of your mom to rush you into getting your dress. I think the dress is pretty BUT it looks a little off with the ivory sash. I think it would look better with the colored sash. Having 2,500 go to waste is CRAZY. Let them alter it however they can to make it better for you. See if they could take the sash off and maybe dye it? If you can afford to buy a new dress and Be happy I say by all means do it! If you can't then you have to try to make the best of it at this point. I would have a heart to heart talk with your mom about the whole situation though. She is not right. It is only 1 day. Your wedding will be beautiful and after you are all dolled up you will look stunning. But I think you should do what makes you happy. Good luck sweetie!!! XOXOXO Kitty
Katie&Chris2006
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Re: Please Help Me - I HATE MY GOWN
Posted by DNicholes
IMHO.....I really think your dress is beautiful and I'm not just saying that. Picture yoursef with you hair & make-up done...jewelry on etc...
My one suggestion....maybe get a brooch to go right in the middle of the sash...that way it gives your dress a little sparkle
I was going to say the same thing about the brooch...just might add a little something extra.
I must say...I love the style of the gown. I wish I could give advice on what to change, but I really love it!
BTW...I'm so sorry you are going through this.
Katie&Chris2006
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Re: Please Help Me - I HATE MY GOWN
Posted by mskittynj
OK here is my honest opinion....And it's coming from a person who is NOT in love with her dress. I understand how you feel. You DO NOT need therapy. It was not nice of your mom to rush you into getting your dress. I think the dress is pretty BUT it looks a little off with the ivory sash. I think it would look better with the colored sash. Having 2,500 go to waste is CRAZY. Let them alter it however they can to make it better for you. See if they could take the sash off and maybe dye it? If you can afford to buy a new dress and Be happy I say by all means do it! If you can't then you have to try to make the best of it at this point. I would have a heart to heart talk with your mom about the whole situation though. She is not right. It is only 1 day. Your wedding will be beautiful and after you are all dolled up you will look stunning. But I think you should do what makes you happy. Good luck sweetie!!! XOXOXO Kitty
I also agree that changing the sash color might help you too...as it will give it a new look. As someone who wore ivory and champagne on my wedding day, i disagree with mom that brides have to be in all white/ivory! is that a possibility? Do you like how the gown looks with the colored sash in the model pic?
SeptBride70
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Re: Please Help Me - I HATE MY GOWN
Posted by DNicholes
IMHO.....I really think your dress is beautiful and I'm not just saying that. Picture yoursef with you hair & make-up done...jewelry on etc...
My one suggestion....maybe get a brooch to go right in the middle of the sash...that way it gives your dress a little sparkle
OMG I could not agree more!!!!!!!!!!
I think it's gorgeous- get yourself a full slip underneath to get that gorgeous, full poof- and WOW! It's going to be SO nice!!!
lilpie19
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Re: Please Help Me - I HATE MY GOWN
I also think your dress is very pretty and looks beautiful! I am not just saying that either! I really like it!
brittny817
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Re: Please Help Me - I HATE MY GOWN
I agree with what most of the girls are saying.
First I really do think it's a lovely gown and you can't just look at it as is...it's a whole look you're putting together. Think of how your hair, m/up, jewlery, veil and other accessories will pull this all together. You can find a talented seamstress that can add any type of decoration to the dress ie crystals, pearls, beading, ect. I am also a big fan of mid-section sashes. My gown has a champagne sash.
If you really, really don't love the dress that's ok too. Trust me there is enough time to get a new one. I've seen girls and been in wedding BP that were put together in less than 3 months!
Don't get too upset. It will work itself out.
AlliCatB
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Re: Please Help Me - I HATE MY GOWN
Posted by Katie&Chris2006
Posted by mskittynj
OK here is my honest opinion....And it's coming from a person who is NOT in love with her dress. I understand how you feel. You DO NOT need therapy. It was not nice of your mom to rush you into getting your dress. I think the dress is pretty BUT it looks a little off with the ivory sash. I think it would look better with the colored sash. Having 2,500 go to waste is CRAZY. Let them alter it however they can to make it better for you. See if they could take the sash off and maybe dye it? If you can afford to buy a new dress and Be happy I say by all means do it! If you can't then you have to try to make the best of it at this point. I would have a heart to heart talk with your mom about the whole situation though. She is not right. It is only 1 day. Your wedding will be beautiful and after you are all dolled up you will look stunning. But I think you should do what makes you happy. Good luck sweetie!!! XOXOXO Kitty
I also agree that changing the sash color might help you too...as it will give it a new look. As someone who wore ivory and champagne on my wedding day, i disagree with mom that brides have to be in all white/ivory! is that a possibility? Do you like how the gown looks with the colored sash in the model pic?
Unfortunately the sash is sewn on and isn't able to be separated from the gown.
I liked the champagne. The BM gowns I picked were champange with an ivory sash draping across the back (which if you'd like to see them, look cheap and awful in the Forever yours pictures, but are in one of my my albums anyways! They're much nicer in person) But since my Mom (aka Control Freak) told me she ordered my dress in all ivory, the girls dresses were ordered in buttercup. See when the BMs were still champagne and my dress had the champagne sash it blended well. Part of what I liked was the whole picture, but now it's all screwy.
Ok I think I will look for a brooch to give it some dazzle -then I won't feel like it's so damn plain- and the lace on the bottom will help. Then maybe some crystals on the bottom and top lace like you ladies said. Wow I should have just gotten the freaken dress in Iman with all this alteration costs!
Speaking of which, how much is it to add crystals to the lace anyways?
AlliCatB
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Re: Please Help Me - I HATE MY GOWN
Posted by carolinebr
Have you had your hair & makeup trial yet? If not, maybe go to Macys afterwards & put the dress on again with your heapiece & all...??? Just an idea.
No I haven't done hair and makeup yet. I'm also white as a ghost which doesn't help.
I'm still not sure what I'm going to do with my hair. OMG - I can't figure anything out!!
