Please tell me this is all worth it :)

OK, we did our wedding budget update last night, and when I added up what we will probably owe after the big day, I nearly hyperventilated (OK, I may have actually hyperventilated a little ). Ladies, I am STRESSED about this cost of this gala- and I am lucky in that my parents are helping us pay for the reception. FH is wonderful, but we have been together almost 7 years, so he says we are 'already pretty much married' and does not hide well that he thinks the wedding is a huge expense-he would rather buy a house. He is very supportive, but I get the feeling he thinks this is more 'my' day than ours, as it is 9 mos away and I dont think its as real to him yet. I was up half the night thinking of the money issues. I need some positive feedback- this will all be worth it on our wedding day....right??!!??

Re: Please tell me this is all worth it :)

I understand what you are going through, my DH and I lived together for 3 yrs before we got married. DH was the same way, he would rather buy a house and that it was more my day. At the end it was all worth it. The day of the wedding he kept saying how wonderful everything was and that he would not change anything. He says he doesn't regret it a bit which is the opposite of everything he said before the day of the wedding.
Don't worry everything will be wonderful. As for the $$$, I am still paying for it and I don't regret it. I def think its worth it.

Re: Please tell me this is all worth it :)

Let me try to help you out----
You live this lifetime only once.... We get one shot. You never get the day back... At the end of a lifetime you turn around and remember the big times in your life- Your wedding is the day that started it all. I'm not saying that the more money you spend the happier our life would be... I'm just saying to do it the way you envisioned.... Life is really too short and give others the opportunity to see you so happy on that day- with the dress, the music, the food.... Sure, It might be another year befroe you buy the house- but you'll eventually get it. And on the coffee table will be the most precious memory in the world, more than the house... the album of the most beautiful day! I'm not very practical--- but often, that is no fun!

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I think I fainted when I looked at how much the wedding would cost

I took a deep breath and so should you. FH wanted to elope after 1 month of putting $$ away. It will absolutely be worth it. It's not just your day... it is BOTH of your day. Just remember if FI complains or is negative, just be positive. You can buy a house after the wedding? (We're looking into a condo for starters) and you can always cut the costs of your vendors. There are tons of posts where the girls here tell what they did to save money. Example, get a nice bridesmaid dress in white as your wedding gown? I almost did that, but am having it made. It only happens once, remind him of that, and I'm sure he'll come around.

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IT's WORTH IT!!

I just want you to know that you are NOT alone in this.. alot of us feel strapped and we will get through it.. everything will come together!!

Re: Please tell me this is all worth it :)

I have the same issues with my FH.....But it will be worth it....every penny! (and I think he is FINALLY starting to come around)
Don't let all the stresses get you down, you can still have your day and buy house...it will just take a little longer....
Good Luck and Everything will work out!

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I can totally relate!!!!!! You know we are both WORRIERS (is that a word??)!!!!!!!!. I do this ALL the time. My FI is exactly like yours. In the end I KNOW they will both appreciate all our hard work and details. It can get WAY out of hand but you have to realize you wouldn't have it or want it any other way. When you're strutting down the aisle in your BEAUTIFUL dress and he see's you........it'll all be worth it.

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I was very worried about being regretful for spending so much pretty much through the entire planning. We were lucky that we could afford to spend a lot without having to rely on anyone else for help - but it is scary to commit to spending so much money for just one day.

Well I can say it was totally worth it! I dont regret a single dollar I spent...and in fact if I had to do it all over again i would have even spent a little more!!

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We all question ourselves, but come the day of and then after, you will be like why did I even worry. I loved every minute of our day, every penny was so worth it. Like Stef said if I had to do it again...not that I would want to, I would spend it all and then some Chin up sweetie all will be well

Re: Please tell me this is all worth it :)

it is sooo worth it- i dont regret it at all- i also wished i had more money too spend on it even though it turned out wonderful and i planned the whole thing in 6 months

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Well I've been having the same thoughts but you know what......we will ALL be doing this ONLY ONCE so let's LIVE IT UP......It will all turn out GREAT (sounds like I'm trying to convince myself huh?) No really, I'm excited!!

Re: Please tell me this is all worth it :)

as long as you are having the type of wedding that have always wanted and dreamed of, then it is 100% worth it

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I understand where you ladies are coming from. A few weeks before the wedding I broke down in tears when I realized how much everything was costing. But I got over it because we were planning and having the wedding of our dreams. As we look back now, we have no regrets. We had a beautiful wedding, and we relive it often by looking at our video and album.

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I feel the same way ladies. There are days when I just want to elope, but in the end I know what I really want a beautiful wedding.

I am just making lots of sacifices and saving every penny I can. My FH and I have been together for a really long time and I think we deserve this.

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No one can tell you that it is 'worth' it or not. I have not one regret about spending what we did on our wedding BUT that doesn't mean everyone feels the same way. I honestly believe that you can have a nice wedding and not spend every dime. You need to decide on what you want more- the wedding of your dreams or the house. There are pros and cons for each. Will your FH resent the fact that so much was spent on the wedding day after the fact? I think you should both really discuss this and come to a mutual decision.
For me, I am glad that we had the wedding that we did, but in all honestly Scott would have been just as happy with a small dinner affair. I wouldn't change what I did, but I don't want to tell some else that it is the right decision for them.

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I am feeling the same way! I feel so guilty buying lunch sometimes because of all the budgeting.. I hate opening that huge folder with all the receipts, and adding up everything.. But eventually it will all come together..

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In the beginning we both wanted to elope. I'm not near the big day yet, but as we keep crossing things off the to do list, it's getting more and more exciting!

It will ALL be worth it!!!! Don't worry about that! It's a once in a lifetime chance to have a big beautiful affair in your honor! Don't be down!! It will be great!

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what would I do without you wonderful ladies? This was just what I needed. I do feel like FH will come around (as I joke, it will probably be as I am walking down the aisle ).
I think it was totally scary to see the 'grand total' on paper (YIKES). It no longer seems like such a bargain to come in under $30k. I am faint just thinking about it. But everytime I think of what the day means, and that I will have waited 8 years to marry this man, I think it will be worth all of the scrimping and saving. And after my crying fit yesterday (darn PMS ), I dont think FH will make any more comments about how much this wedding is costing us. Poor thing, seems so overwhelmed by the whole wedding process!

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I would say most of the FH are

Re: Please tell me this is all worth it :)

I think my heart actually stopped when we one day totalled our wedding expenses. We never did that again For us it was worth it. It's a once in a lifetime event!