One of my bridesmaid just found out she is two months pregnant. She will be six months for my wedding. I didn't want any pregnant woman in my wedding. What are your thoughts on this? I don't think the groomsmen will be comfortable walking in with a six month pregnant woman. Do I tell her it's okay to not be in my wedding or should I let it be?
CJStein
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Re: Preganant bridesmaid ?
She might feel uncomfortable being a BM, so maybe let her make the decision. But you did ask her b/c you wanted her to be a part of your wedding, right? I don't think the pregnancy should matter. JMHO.
aok2000
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Re: Preganant bridesmaid ?
One of my girls found out she was going to be pregnant for the wedding. I let her decide, I told her that if she didn't want to be in the wedding, if it would be too much, she could step down. She thought I didn't want her in the wedding because she was pregnant and got very hurt. After I explained to her that it didn't matter to me that she was pregnant, she said she wouldn't step down for anything.
I would discuss it with her, but let it be up to her- I wouldn't tell her that you don't want her in it because she's pregnant.
coxmandi
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Re: Preganant bridesmaid ?
What is wrong with a pregnant bridesmaid? You should be happy for your friend to be pregnant and not kick her out of her bridal party. (If she wants out on her own accord, thats another thing.) Just like having a 'big' bridesmaid she won't ruin your pictures or spoil your day. You chose her for a reason, and should be supportive. There are plenty of dresses that have styles that will accomodate a 6 month pregnancy. I don't think the groomsman will care that he walks with a pregnant girl...who cares???
Monkeybride
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Re: Preganant bridesmaid ?
At 6 months she will still probably feel fine. What is your reason for not wanting a pregnant woman to be a BM? I mean if she's a friend, pregnant or not don't you want her to share your day?
I would be very hurt if a friend asked me to step down because I was pregnant. Honestly it would ruin the friendship because I would find that very selfish. If you are a friend you should be happy that she is pregnant.
PUPADOLCE
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Re: Preganant bridesmaid ?
I don't want her to step down. I asked her because I wanted her in my bridal party. I'll make her decide. I just think the groomsmen will feel very uncomfortable having to do the first dance with a preganent woman. We also already order a size 4 dress and I don't think it will fit her by the wedding. Do I order another dress?
VS11
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Re: Preganant bridesmaid ?
Wouldnt bother me at all!!!!! I would be honored that my friend was prego and still wants to be in my wedding,,that shows that she accepted to be a BM for all the right reasons...Because of the love and friendship you both shared...
ETA: I don think the GM will feel uncomfortable...IT'S ONE DANCE and it isnt even a whole song................
TEDNJENN
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Re: Preganant bridesmaid ?
I asked one of my friends when she was prgenant to be in the BP and told her I totally understood if she felt is was too much and she aggreed it would be. SHe would have been due around the wedding. PLus 3 of my BM are trying to get pregnant! I dont mind. WHat ever happens happens! As the other girls said... I asked them for a reason to be in the bridal party.
Preshy7
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Re: Preganant bridesmaid ?
wouldnt bother me!! as long as she feels fine and is comfortable standing for pics. id tell her that if she didnt want to do it that i wouldnt be hurt but i think its wrong to tell her not to be in it. shes your friend after all
Laura1976
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Re: Preganant bridesmaid ?
did you ask her to be in your bridal party because she was thin and not pregnant or because she is your friend????
Goldi1021
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Re: Preganant bridesmaid ?
Posted by PUPADOLCE
I don't want her to step down. I asked her because I wanted her in my bridal party. I'll make her decide. I just think the groomsmen will feel very uncomfortable having to do the first dance with a preganent woman. We also already order a size 4 dress and I don't think it will fit her by the wedding. Do I order another dress?
If a man cannot see the beauty of a pregnant woman, then he isn't much of a man. Unless she is 15 with braces and pregnant, there is no reason why a man should feel uncomfortable. Remember also that a pregnant woman is adding to her family. It shouldn't be something to be embarrassed or ashamed of. JMO.
Yes, you will more than likely have to order another dress.
McSulllivan
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Re: Preganant bridesmaid ?
My future sister in law is planning to be 'very' pregnant at the wedding. I thnk it's awesome that years from now, I'll be able to tell my little niece or nephew that he or she was at our wedding and 'in' our wedding pictures!!
Blu-ize
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Re: Preganant bridesmaid ?
What difference does it make? I think this is a little immature.
jesslangen
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I think its rude of you to not want her to be part of your wedding because she is pregnant. My sister (MOH) is planning on being pregnant (she isnt yet) for the wedding and Im ok with it if she is. I want her to be part of my day because I love her and she is a special person in my life...not for her slim figure
jcndd
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Re: Preganant bridesmaid ?
My girlfriend asked me to be in her wedding party 1 year ago. I am now pregnant and at the time of her wedding will be 7 months pregnant and I'm sure VERY big I couldn't tell you how hurt I'd be if she told me to make a choice about being in her wedding party now because the groomsman might be uncomfortable. That's crazy! Why would a man feel uncomfortable dancing 1 dance with someone carrying a child? She's THRILLED I'm pg! And feels like it'll be good luck to her.
As far as the dress, it can be altered. Or a new one ordered. She would need to go to the bridal salon and let them tell her how much is in the seams and whether or not it can be let out.
I really hope your friendship prevails in this. It's about your friends surrounding you on the happiest day of your life. Not whether or not someone is pregnant.
eroxgirl
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Re: Preganant bridesmaid ?
When I was first planning my wedding my MOH was trying to get pregnant and I was so afraid she'd be 9 mos. at my wedding. She planned her pregnancy around it (her choice, not mine!) so it wasn't an issue. Another BM and I discussed it at the time, how neither of us would want a preggo BM in our BP. 5 months before the wedding, after the BM gowns came in that same BM got pregnant and she was hysterical crying when she told me because she thought I'd kick her out. At that moment it all became clear to me that what I really wanted was my friend beside me on my day - pregnant or not. She was 6 months at my wedding day and HUGE - and absolutely beautiful.
And as far as what the groomsman thinks...WHO CARES???? Pregnant or not, some men (if they're married or in a committed relationship) aren't comfortable dancing with another woman regardless...some men wouldn't want to dance with an overweight or unattractive BM - do you eliminate your friends from your BP if they fall into that category? Of course not! It might seem like a big deal in theory but it will be the furthest thing from your mind on your day.
ETA: My BM gown was a 2 piece CORSET TOP and they managed to make it fit her huuuuge belly. Just call the store ASAP and let them know bc this kind of thing happens all the time. They should know how to handle it.
Mrs. dleeny
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Re: Preganant bridesmaid ?
why would you ask her to step down? She's preganant, not an invalid.
you should talk to her, she might not even want to be on your BP anymore. Otherwise you will risk losing a friend.
Anniegrl
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Re: Preganant bridesmaid ?
My MOH was 5 months pregnant on our wedding day. She didn't have to order a new dress; the seamstress was able to make a panel to expand the waist with material that she trimmed off the hem. The dress was also 2 piece so the top covered the waistline of the dress.
And it's only ONE dance that your groomsman has to dance to with her. It's not a big deal IMO.
Janice
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Re: Preganant bridesmaid ?
Your wedding must be so well thought out at this point to be worrying about this non issue
Melissa
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At my wedding me and my DH danced and then the groomsmen and bridesmaids came onto the floor and danced with their S/O. We didn't make them dance with each other. We knew it would be uncomfortable for them. This way they can enjoy their loved one!
