Protestant vs Catholic

My family is non-practicing Protestant (dad and I are athiets) my sister is the only religious person and went to (Protestant)church always on her own. Here's the problem. her FH is Catholic (Irish/Italian). He wants a Catholic wedding for the sacrement(?) or it will not be recognized. My sister wants Protestant, b/c she does not want to say she will raise her children Catholic (although she says its OK if FH does) They have been arguing over this for quite a while and still don't have a Church. DOes anyone know the specifics of the Catholic requirements? Protestants will be recognized in a Catholic Church, but Catholics will not have their wedding recognized in a Protestant Church. I want to help my sister, but just don't know the answers...can anyone help?

Protestant vs Catholic

We had sort of the same 'problem.' I don`t really have the specific answers for you, but I do believe if they choose a Protestant church, the marriage will be recognized if they have a Catholic priest involved in the ceremony and fulfill whatever requirements. I was raised Protestant, my husband was raised Catholic, but my family has more ties to our church than my husband to his. Having been raised Protestant, obviously there were some things I just didn`t agree with in the Catholic church, and I just wouldn`t have felt comfortable agreeing to have and then raise children Catholic. We`re just not sure if children are in our future, and I wouldn`t want to agree to something like that unless we knew absolutely for sure. I don`t want this to seem like I`m passing along my beliefs, those are just some of the things that made our decision for us. As it turned out, my husband has been so detatched from his church for such a long time, that he never even tried to discuss with them how exactly to go about having the marriage recognized, but our church was willing to let him have a Catholic priest there. Another alternative that his mother has pushed for, prior to and after the wedding, is having a small private ceremony before the Catholic church, so it can be recognized. But I`m really not sure how that works or if it would be frowned upon by the Catholic church.

Protestant vs Catholic

I suggest that they call her FH priest and talk to them about it. If she would like to have a Protestant ceremony, her FH should have a Catholic priest there, and the marriage should be recognized by the Catholic Chucrh. Again, their best bet is to physically talk to a priest.

Protestant vs Catholic

I suggest they speak to a Priest. If the wedding takes place and is recognized by the Catholic Church, i.e. if a priest is present, then it will be recognized. The wedding has to be of a 'form' acceptable to the Catholic Church (e.g. in a Church, priest present, etc.) The Church will perform Interfaith marriages, and recognize them, but from what I understand, I think that the non-Catholic will have to agree to raise any children Catholic. That's what I heard from others, but the easiest thing to do is just call any church and speak to a priest or deacon.

Protestant vs Catholic

I know a lot about this! (and my info is from the Chancellor of the Archdiocese of the Long Island area) The Roman Catholic Church has had to make concessions for inter-faith marriages. A Roman Catholic priest can sign a dispensation form to okay this union so it will be recognized as a sacrament for the Catholic. The priest would perform the ceremony with the other officiant in this case. When my sister married a Jewish man, he did have to sign a form saying that the children would be raised Roman Catholic - they are VERY hard-core about this. Go to www.drvc.org for info - and make sure somebody calls a priest! Good luck to your sister - this religion part is not an easy road.

Re: Protestant vs Catholic

Catholic is best

Re: Protestant vs Catholic (kinda long)

I just want to let you know that I had the same problems w/my fi he's catholic and I'm lutheran. Well, when we first got engaged this was a BIG issue. So, we went to speak to his priest and he said that it wasn't as a big a deal as we thought. He had said that he would have to get dispensations for everything. It was all just paperwork for his side of it. He then asked about our children and I told him flat out that I wasn't raising the kids 100% catholic. And that, I want them to acknowledge both of their religions. The priest said that was fine. But, he said that he just wanted to make sure that I didn't have a problem with my FI being the 'catholic' role model that my children to go to ... etc. And I was like I'm fine with that but, that there's no way I'm signing anything that states that I'm bringing up my kids as catholic. And he assured me that, that wasn't a problem.
I had asked the priest, why had the catholic church been so strict in the past and not now? His answer was that the catholic faith has been losing a lot of its following (as with other religions) and they feel the only way to try to keep the ones they have is to change a lil w/the times (ex. interfaith marriages, etc.).
I say to definitely contact a priest in your area. If anything let me know and I'll give you the name of my FI's priest.
Hope everything goes well.

Re: Protestant vs Catholic (kinda long)

We are having the same problem. I am catholic and FH is protestant. You sister's FH can double check with his priest, but my priest told me that since I am getting married outside of the church (and by a protestant minister) I do NOT have to have a priest there. I just have to get permission from my church before hand so that they will recognize it.

I also agree with WishCandy. The children don't have to be raised catholic, you just have to accept BOTH religions in your houshold and have your children understand both.

Hope ths helps.

Re: Protestant vs Catholic (kinda long)

I feel kinda bad about saying this but, I feel that it's all about the benjamins$$$. 'Cause when we left the meeting with my FI's priest. I felt like basically as long as you still give the church the $$$, they ask for - they'll recognize the marriage. I think it's good in one sense because they'll recognize it (for my FI's sake), but on other hand - I feel like they should recognize it regardless because shouldn't they be happy for my FI that he found someone that he loves and wants to share the rest of his life with?
(just my opinion - for what it's worth)

Re: Protestant vs Catholic

I had a similar problem. Both FH and I were raised Catholic. Here's why I have a problem with the Catholic church - My sister was born premature - They didn't know if she was going to make it - When the Catholic priest came to see my mom at the hospital, he would not bless my sister because my mom and dad weren't married in the church so my sister, was, to them, born out of wedlock. Pathetic - It makes me sick to think it. Needless to say, I am turned off by the Catholic church but my FH's family really wanted us to be married in a Catholic church. I did A LOT of research. Protestant, Episcopal and Catholic churches all have similar marriage ceremonies. We looked into all of them. The only church that didn't require us to make a HUGE 'donation' was the Episcopal church. It is very similar to Catholicism except that they are accepting of everyone. My church is not charging me a dime to get married there - There's just an optional donation.
If your sister doesn't want to raise her kids Catholic, they probably should not chose the Catholic church for their wedding - They require you to sign a document swearing you'll raise your children in their church.I would definitely suggest that they visit different parishes and find one where they feel comfortable.

Re: Protestant vs Catholic

My brother and his girlfriend had my nephew 4 years ago- they never married. My nephew was bapitized in the Catholic Church with NO problems at all. I am sure 20-30 years ago things were different, but just wanted to share this with you.

I believe this is an issue that needs to be worked out and discussed PRIOR to marriage. Couples need to discuss how they want to raise their children. Religious difference can break a marriage apart- not say they will, but an undiscussed difference can. I know lots of inter-faith couples that have wonderful marriages- but they all discussed the situations before marriage. This is such a private decision between two people. I think that your sister and her FH should go to both Churches and discuss their feelings very OPENLY and HONESTLY. Then make the decision that is best for them.

Re: Protestant vs Catholic

I am Catholic and my husband is Protestant. We had these discussions a lot before we decided to get married in my Church. And yes, we did agree to raise our children Catholic before hand, so getting married in the Catholic church wasn't a super huge issue for my hubby. However, we will be alternating on attending services at both types of Churches.

In any case, find out about the whole thing from a priest at the parish, because I have found that many parishes have different rules about how the marriage can be recgnized as a sacrament in the Catholic faith.