QOTD - 9/2/13

Thanks for choosing me to be BOTW! Hopefully none of my questions are repeats!

Who in your life has really shown you their true colors since you started planning your wedding? Is there anyone you expected to be a nightmare that turned out to be incredibly helpful?

Growing up I had two of my cousins around me at all times, they were more like sisters to me than my own sister. One of them is my MOH and the other was a BM. I'm not going to get into detail, but the one who was a BM recently told me she couldn't be in the wedding because she was planning on moving to Paris at the end of October. I am SO happy for her because she's been talking about it for a while. However, she made the situation really dramatic and caused a lot of tension between us by not returning the calls from the dress store when they were waiting on her to place to order and then not answering my phone calls or texts when I was just trying to find out what was going on. I've put it behind me but for some reason she seems really spiteful and I'm not sure why. I know she is older and is looking for the right one, but I would never be spiteful about any of her accomplishments so I'm not sure when she's being that way towards me.

On the other hand, I don't really have anyone I expected to be a nightmare. Everyone is going to have their own opinions and I listen to them but I'm still going to do things the way FH and I want to do them in the end

QOTD - 9/2/13 - Long Island Weddings

I think the true colors have come out with a lot of people but not necessarily people who are IN the wedding. I think right now I'm most concerned about one of my friends who is a BM. I haven't heard from her since the engagement party which was the beginning of June.

Our relationship has gone through a lot of changes and I was a BM in her wedding and I did EVERYTHING. When I met FH she started being distant and has only been around FH twice. Three times if you include the engagement party.

She has shown NO interest in hanging out with us and her husband and hasn't returned any of my phone calls. I really thought she was going to be all about being involved in my wedding and she really isn't at all. I'm not really sure where to go from this point :(

Re: QOTD - 9/2/13

A lot of true colors have come to light however, I knew about them beforehand and just figured that in my time of happiness people would stop being SO selfish but apparently not! The dynamic has definitely shifted since I am no longer concerned with any BS, annoyances and it is about me and FH, no one else. If someone has a problem with me prioritizing my FH then they can take a walk.

There have been many bumps in relationships and some relationships have completely diminished and I have to say, it is for the best. I have put up with years of abuse from my father and throughout this process cut the cord and feel much happier with my decision, much more peaceful!

QOTD - 9/2/13 - Long Island Weddings

While I haven't had any bad experiences, a lot of people have surprised me by being super helpful. I totally did not expect certain people to care so much about the wedding or step up the way they did, and they are not even in the bridal party.

QOTD - 9/2/13 - Long Island Weddings

Who in your life has really shown you their true colors since you started planning your wedding? Is there anyone you expected to be a nightmare that turned out to be incredibly helpful?

I wouldn't call anyone a nightmare, but my FH family is totally catching me off guard. His dad seems to have an opinion on everything, which I didnt expect at all. Unfortunately, they are the opinions I would have expected--spend less, you dont need flowers they die that week, you dont need an open bar, you dont need limos just have friends drive others, you dont need to wear tuxedos, etc. I get really stressed because right now I am unemployed and FH is supporting me, so I cant help but feel like his dad is seeing me as abusing his money. He will tell FH that he is just joking with me, but I seriously start sweating and fidgeting, you'd think he could let me off the hook.

The rest of his family is taking me surprise as well. His brother is the straight out of college guy and his sister is young too, but they have had some really mature things to say to me to calm me down in moments like the ones I described above. They both have pulled me aside to say 'its your wedding, they have all been married before'. Or my favorite was 'why are you telling him things anyway?' lol Good point!

QOTD - 9/2/13 - Long Island Weddings

I carefully picked my wedding party as to avoid the drama and so far so good. My mom was suprised when I did not ask one of my friends and asked me and I simply responded her personality would clash with the other girls adn I do not want to hear it.

My mom however has been the one I am worried about. I have ahd my STD's for a few months now mine have been finished since July.. My mom had said she would do her family and friends envelopes so I didnt have to worry about it.. well she was off all summer and didnt do one.. Last Sunday I made her sit down and do them while I was over adn I stuffed the envelopes and put the return address label on all of the ones I completed while she did that.. Do you know she is still missing addresses!! And not just my dads friends who i didnt think she would have but some family too.. So still they are not going to be sent out this week like I had hoped. Bonus is she is taking care of the postage for them and mailing them all out but still. I am creeping on 6 mos I would have liked to have them out by now since I should be concentrating on ordering my invites!!

QOTD - 9/2/13 - Long Island Weddings

It has been a really interesting experience so far.... my mom and sister have been SUPER helpful, but not pushy AT ALL, which was my fear. They have their opinions and give them when I ask, but they are not overwhelming me at all. FH has been amazingly helpful... I can't believe how much he does for this wedding, and NOT just when he is asked to do it! Sometimes he just shows up home and says 'I did this!' or 'I called them!' It's refreshing!! MY FIL's have been really excited about everything, always asking about what's new in the wedding world and happy when we share, but they haven't been overwhelming either!

QOTD - 9/2/13 - Long Island Weddings

Well my mom has NOT been pushy at all which I was nervous about in the beginning so I'm pleasantly surprised with that! The one person who has been putting a damper on wedding planning is my FMIL. She was all on board with it when we got engaged but since there hasn't been much planning going on this summer we haven't really talked about the wedding. Yesterday she was at my house and the wedding was mentioned and she swears she forgot about the wedding and said any planning we do right now is stupid because it's still 13 months away. I thought she was kidding at first but she was actually pretty serious which I was beyond shocked about. Even FH was shocked at her. This next year should be interesting!