Question about shower gifts--- this is odd

So....I had my shower last sat. My mom and sis surprised me w/ a bash...it was so nice and FUN!!!

I didn't want a shower b/c there's no point in registering since FH and I have a house and 2 yrs ago we had a huge housewarming party (before we got engaged) and I still have gifts that i haven't used.

Anyhow...people took the liberty to give me gifts which was nice of them...but I got one in particular that was odd from FH's cousin which reads.

'Your shower and wedding gift is our free week at our time share' let us know when you want to go and I'll book the hotel only.

Is this a gift?
So we (fh and I) and his cousin own timeshares in Disney in seperate hotels and I get the same benefits she gets. So..the flight is not included...so the gift is what?? her week?
Please help me make sense of this???? what you do, feel or react? i don't know wether to laugh, be upset or what?

Sounds like they offered you their time share for free.

I'd take them up on the offer and to be honest, I'd be very happy about it!!! I think thats very thoughtful of them!

hold on i just re-read it.

Book the hotel only? What does that mean?

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Posted by DonnaPWhite1124

hold on i just re-read it.

Book the hotel only? What does that mean?

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exactly!!!!!! is....is this really a gift?

That's like me offering a newlywed to stay at my house for the weekend and say that's their wedding gift!!!

call me old fashion but to all the weddings Ive been to i've given cash or check.

I say call them up and find out.

I am confused myself.

If it were me though, I'd use the time share for a week. Nice to take some time off

I think they mean pay your own airfare.

It's still a free week vacation somewhere, though...

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Posted by Tracey1979

I think they mean pay your own airfare.

It's still a free week vacation somewhere, though...

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No they are not paying for airfare

HAHA!! You can take this either way.

I mean you can go away for a week and just pay for the airfare... which in one respect is AWESOME!!!

They could have been trying to think outside the box and also save some money at the same time.

Personally... people are all funny and odd... I would laugh a it and then take them up on it!! I love vacations and going away. It might seem silly now... BUT... guaranteed when you are on the vacation you will be thankful.

I agree it is very odd... and can look as though they are trying to evade giving a gift. But you know them better than any of us do... so deciphering their intentions is only a guessing game for us. If I received this as a gift.... I would have better insight as to their intentions based on who they are as a person.

Bottom line is... you can take it negatively or positively.... and I always try to go the positive route.

Have fun on your vacation!!!! You could even go away for your one year anniversary!!! AWW soo cute!!!!
What areas does the time share include?

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Posted by cedesnyc

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Posted by DonnaPWhite1124

hold on i just re-read it.

Book the hotel only? What does that mean?

---

exactly!!!!!! is....is this really a gift?

That's like me offering a newlywed to stay at my house for the weekend and say that's their wedding gift!!!

call me old fashion but to all the weddings Ive been to i've given cash or check.

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YUP - I would give cash or a check as well.

it would be A LOT nicer if they were to pay for the airefare. NOW that's an AMAZING gift!!!!

if you shop around though you might be able to find some cheap airfare.

Haha sorry to keep posting... but I keep re-reading your original post.

The ONLY part that really annoys me... is that this is your gift for the shower AND wedding.
The time share is something they paid for... so depending on how you look at it.... the week they are giving you isn't costing them anything. However they are giving up one of their weeks OR giving up the opportunity to sell their week back to the time share company and make some $.
But that fact that this is the shower AND wedding gift makes it a little annoying.... however I don't know how much the week is worth - meaning I don't know how much they could make off of selling it back to the company. Depending on that amount.. this is either a very generous or very cheap gift. Either way you still get a vacation out of it.

Some time shares are AMAZING!!! FSIL has a time share where they also have a private butler... and you give them a list of groceries ... someone goes shopping for you and when you arrive all your groceries are there for you!!!! Nevis and Belize are both included and I forget where else. So if it were her time share... I KNOW that would be a nice one!!!

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Posted by KerriJohnS

HAHA!! You can take this either way.

I mean you can go away for a week and just pay for the airfare... which in one respect is AWESOME!!!

They could have been trying to think outside the box and also save some money at the same time.

Personally... people are all funny and odd... I would laugh a it and then take them up on it!! I love vacations and going away. It might seem silly now... BUT... guaranteed when you are on the vacation you will be thankful.

I agree it is very odd... and can look as though they are trying to evade giving a gift. But you know them better than any of us do... so deciphering their intentions is only a guessing game for us. If I received this as a gift.... I would have better insight as to their intentions based on who they are as a person.

Bottom line is... you can take it negatively or positively.... and I always try to go the positive route.

Have fun on your vacation!!!! You could even go away for your one year anniversary!!! AWW soo cute!!!!
What areas does the time share include?

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You're right!!! i should be happy about a free vacation and I'm the only one that may know their intentions rather than the board.

We both own times shares and this one in particular is a Disney time share which is the same one that I have. My friends and family ask me to stay and I let them...I just would not offer it as a gift its more like a favor or nice gesture. I guess I can take her up on it but for that I'll stay at my own..i dunno...its too weird for me....
I'll look at the positive side of this

This is my take.

They have a time share. We (and you) dont know where it is.

I think the term 'free week' means that its the one week they can book anywhere the Timeshare has a place. Usually Timeshares make you go the same week to the same place every year.

They are offering you a week at the hotel of the timeshare, wherever that is.

So they are giving you a free week of hotel.

Honestly, they could have a timeshare in Disney, Hawaii or Rome. You just dont know.

Time shares are expensive so they THINK they are giving you a REALLY nice gift. Thats what they THINK. But we all know its a cheep way for them to get out of forking over cash.

I would say let it go. Its not worth the agrivation its causing.

Are they cheep? Yes. Can you call them out on their cheepness? No.

I would be annoyed to.

But the good news is if you are going on vacation at all YOU would have to pay for hotel and air. This way you dont have to pay for a hotel for a week. Pick somewhere you have never been and want to go. Alaska? New Orleans? LA? Miami? Key West?

Just let it go though. With the wedding approcahing you have better things to worry about than this.

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Posted by cedesnyc

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Posted by KerriJohnS

HAHA!! You can take this either way.

I mean you can go away for a week and just pay for the airfare... which in one respect is AWESOME!!!

They could have been trying to think outside the box and also save some money at the same time.

Personally... people are all funny and odd... I would laugh a it and then take them up on it!! I love vacations and going away. It might seem silly now... BUT... guaranteed when you are on the vacation you will be thankful.

I agree it is very odd... and can look as though they are trying to evade giving a gift. But you know them better than any of us do... so deciphering their intentions is only a guessing game for us. If I received this as a gift.... I would have better insight as to their intentions based on who they are as a person.

Bottom line is... you can take it negatively or positively.... and I always try to go the positive route.

Have fun on your vacation!!!! You could even go away for your one year anniversary!!! AWW soo cute!!!!
What areas does the time share include?

---

You're right!!! i should be happy about a free vacation and I'm the only one that may know their intentions rather than the board.

We both own times shares and this one in particular is a Disney time share which is the same one that I have. My friends and family ask me to stay and I let them...I just would not offer it as a gift its more like a favor or nice gesture. I guess I can take her up on it but for that I'll stay at my own..i dunno...its too weird for me....
I'll look at the positive side of this

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HAHA OMG!! I didn't realize it was the SAME one you have!! Does she know that? Maybe when you call her to discuss this.. or have FH call her since she is his cousin (then you don't have to step on any new family member's toes) you could delicately mention that you have the same time share??

Yea a lot of times depending on the number of weeks the family has they usually give up a few to friends and other family members for free and as a nice gestrure. It all depends on their specific situation.

Did you tell FMIL about this? She would be her niece right? I wonder what FMIL thinks of this.

HAHA!

I still feel like the real gift would be if she bought the airfare to go with it. Then she is actually putting money into it. But MAYBE she is going through a really difficult time right now... and she's strapped and wants to give you something?? IDK. I'm reaching.

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Posted by Sarahgetsmarried

This is my take.

They have a time share. We (and you) dont know where it is.

I think the term 'free week' means that its the one week they can book anywhere the Timeshare has a place. Usually Timeshares make you go the same week to the same place every year.

They are offering you a week at the hotel of the timeshare, wherever that is.

So they are giving you a free week of hotel.

Honestly, they could have a timeshare in Disney, Hawaii or Rome. You just dont know.

Time shares are expensive so they THINK they are giving you a REALLY nice gift. Thats what they THINK. But we all know its a cheep way for them to get out of forking over cash.

I would say let it go. Its not worth the agrivation its causing.

Are they cheep? Yes. Can you call them out on their cheepness? No.

I would be annoyed to.

But the good news is if you are going on vacation at all YOU would have to pay for hotel and air. This way you dont have to pay for a hotel for a week. Pick somewhere you have never been and want to go. Alaska? New Orleans? LA? Miami? Key West?

Just let it go though. With the wedding approcahing you have better things to worry about than this.

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hahaha ONLY it's Disney AND she already has the SAME timeshare!! haha!!

But I agree with you!!!

It's hard because you can't say how you really feel about it to the cousin without sounding ungrateful and rude. UNLESS you can go the route of... I have this timeshare already.

IF it makes you feel any better...

Way back when my grandmother got married... the gift from her mother (which would be my greatgrandmother) was.... drum roll please....

She paid to have my grandmothers OLD bedroom set delivered to her new apartment with her new husband to get it out of her house!!!!

This was sometime around 1945 to 1950. Still.... not the best gift AND from your own mother no less. HAHAHAHA!!!

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Posted by KerriJohnS

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Posted by cedesnyc

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Posted by KerriJohnS

HAHA!! You can take this either way.

I mean you can go away for a week and just pay for the airfare... which in one respect is AWESOME!!!

They could have been trying to think outside the box and also save some money at the same time.

Personally... people are all funny and odd... I would laugh a it and then take them up on it!! I love vacations and going away. It might seem silly now... BUT... guaranteed when you are on the vacation you will be thankful.

I agree it is very odd... and can look as though they are trying to evade giving a gift. But you know them better than any of us do... so deciphering their intentions is only a guessing game for us. If I received this as a gift.... I would have better insight as to their intentions based on who they are as a person.

Bottom line is... you can take it negatively or positively.... and I always try to go the positive route.

Have fun on your vacation!!!! You could even go away for your one year anniversary!!! AWW soo cute!!!!
What areas does the time share include?

---

You're right!!! i should be happy about a free vacation and I'm the only one that may know their intentions rather than the board.

We both own times shares and this one in particular is a Disney time share which is the same one that I have. My friends and family ask me to stay and I let them...I just would not offer it as a gift its more like a favor or nice gesture. I guess I can take her up on it but for that I'll stay at my own..i dunno...its too weird for me....
I'll look at the positive side of this

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HAHA OMG!! I didn't realize it was the SAME one you have!! Does she know that? Maybe when you call her to discuss this.. or have FH call her since she is his cousin (then you don't have to step on any new family member's toes) you could delicately mention that you have the same time share??

Yea a lot of times depending on the number of weeks the family has they usually give up a few to friends and other family members for free and as a nice gestrure. It all depends on their specific situation.

Did you tell FMIL about this? She would be her niece right? I wonder what FMIL thinks of this.

HAHA!

I still feel like the real gift would be if she bought the airfare to go with it. Then she is actually putting money into it. But MAYBE she is going through a really difficult time right now... and she's strapped and wants to give you something?? IDK. I'm reaching.

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LOL Yes she's well aware that we have the same timeshare since we've traveled together. MY FH is livid and I'm not one to start something so I'm not even going to say anything. I'm very cool about stuff and I've heard of all the crazy and weird things that happen around weddings and I was wondering if this situation is one of those.....I dunno

We don't discuss finances but my FH's family lives pretty comfortably. Funny i just texted her to see what she's doing and she's at barneys shopping for a bag...can't decide between designers...then she wants to meet for lunch....So is she financially stuggling....Hell No she can easily pay for my whole wedding and then some and not feel it.

HAHAHAHAHA
This DEFINATELY consitutes as one of those weird things that happens at a wedding!!!!!!

OMG... you should have put all those facts in the beginning!!! It's like pulling teeth with you ... but now I see the whole picture!! Is she just a nut bag???? Someone old in my family was nuts... and gave my cousin a doll when she was little. ONLY it was a doll that was up in her attic for YEARS and the head was hanging off and it was scary looking. My cousin screamed and cried when she opened the box!!! HAHA!!! Your FH cousin sounds a tad like this nut job!!

I can't believe you traveled together with the timeshare!!!! This is all absurd!! Your FH has a right to be angry. I mean yea all in all it's a gift and the thought that counts. But in this case.. it's more like she's evading giving a gift!!
Is she normally a 'cheap' kind of person when it comes to other people? Obviously not cheap herself since she's off shopping for a designer bag in Barney's no less!! haha!!!

At least you know what's expected of you when it's time for you to reciprocate a gift back to her for something. Definately DO NOT go above and beyond for ANYTHING!!!!!

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Posted by KerriJohnS

HAHAHAHAHA
This DEFINATELY consitutes as one of those weird things that happens at a wedding!!!!!!

I can't believe you traveled together with the timeshare!!!! This is all absurd!! Your FH has a right to be angry. I mean yea all in all it's a gift and the thought that counts. But in this case.. it's more like she's evading giving a gift!!
Is she normally a 'cheap' kind of person when it comes to other people? Obviously not cheap herself since she's off shopping for a designer bag in Barney's no less!! haha!!!

At least you know what's expected of you when it's time for you to reciprocate a gift back to her for something. Definately DO NOT go above and beyond for ANYTHING!!!!!

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Kerri--ITA.

What a CHEEP Bee-atch!

But you can do one of 2 things.

1. (Keep your dignity and class) Say thank for the gift but since you have a disney timeshare you wont be able to use hers. It was a really nice offer but you dont want the week to go to waste.

2. Just use it. Maybe its at the best resort that is offered!

But yes, now we know she is trying to be cheep and get out of giving you the gift. Take the high road on this and just let it go. She is not worth it.