Question for the Moms....

Since I am no where near being a MOM, I tend to think that your lines of thinking would be alot more rational then mine..
So.......


As a Mom would you ever email your child's friend seeking out their help to your child's problem.........

hi there-
not really following your question....
can you be a bit more specific?

Say your child was a young adult......
and having MAJOR issues with a boyfriend and police are involved........
WOuld you take it upon your self as the mother to seek out your child's friend to email them and suggest they get involved?

T - I don't know if I would ever get involved with a friend's issue unless my friend had told me what was going on. If anything, I would maybe try to talk to my friend without telling her that her mother contacted you. I think I would feel violated if I thought my mother was going behind my back & telling my friends what's going on. As a mother, It's HER responsibility to be the adult & protect her child & provide guidance.

This sounds like a situation for her parents to handle. You can provide support if your friend asks, but I wouldn't go any further than that.

As the mother I would take control of the sitution myself. I would probably alert the friend's parents of the sitution though, in case, their child could be involved or God forbid get hurt.
Now if I thought my child was emotionally hurting due to the situation I may ask one of her friends to sleep over, go to a movie etc... to give my child a larger support group. If the friend was involved herself in the situation, such as in drugs or helping my child to cover-up, I would again tell the parents. But overall, I am the parent and I will be the one to deal with the problem.

editted to say:Has this girl been raped by the boyfriend (I pray not) but since you said the Police were involved I thought that maybe that happend. If that was the case, I would speak to her friends so that they understand what has happened and explain to them how we can all help. Because I am sure they would also want to understand what is happening. But I would never e-mail. I would always call and let their parents know what I am doing.

So Michele.
U as the Mom would never call me or Ronnie as the friend and ask us to be involved in a situation that is dangerous and we have no place in?

Are we talking about YOUR friend or a friend's daughter? I guess you need to explain more T. I am thinking of a 13 or so year old girl here, not an adult. So I thought the question was basically 'would I call my teenage child's friends for help' And, I wouldn't do that.

If we are talking about YOUR friend (someone in the 20's) and this is an intervention type situation, then yes, I would request your help. I would never ask you to 'watch' her, or 'not allow her to see this guy' because a) it is unfair to ask you to do that and b) you cannot control an adult women's actions.

As her friend you have every right to speak to her about what is happening in her life. If my friend were in some sort of trouble my mouth would be talking!!!!

FM Michellllllllllllle