Question for those of you pregnant or already have children!!

nov2004bride Posted: Apr 09, 2004 10:48 PM

Question for those of you pregnant or already have children!!

I was just wondering if you have children or are pregnant, either before the wedding or soon after, regret not having enough time being just a couple? Do you wish you could or would have waited? I know it is a blessing either way but I was just curious. My FI and I have been fighting about this subject and I am so stressed out about it. Thanks

BriarRose Posted: Apr 10, 2004 12:16 AM

Re: Question for those of you pregnant or already have children!!

Well we had a honeymoon baby. No regret.
My cousin and her DH however had baby soon after they were married a year or so later, and they are now getting a divorce. Family gossip says it's because my cousin wanted more time for couple stuff and her DH wanted a baby. They love there son but there marriage could not survive the transition.

MSCJLK Posted: Apr 10, 2004 04:52 AM

Re: Question for those of you pregnant or already have children!!

we waited almost 2 and half years.. DH was really ready and I was not... We did alot right aftr we were married.. we bought a house 2 days after we got home from our honetmoon and we just settled into a life and then decided to start trying...amnd it happened on the first try

Good luck.. this is a choice that you need to make together...

Samanthas Mom Posted: Apr 10, 2004 07:54 AM

Re: Question for those of you pregnant or already have children!!

I think when your both ready you are ready
DH wanted to wait a year or so and we did but I think its a blessing whether its a HM baby or you wait, if we didnt wait, I Know I would have no regrets

IrishTracy Posted: Apr 10, 2004 10:30 AM

Re: Question for those of you pregnant or already have children!!

Our son was 22 months at our wedding. And yes there was a bit of 'We are already a family. This just makes it 'legal' But there is still that specialness about the day that didn't matter that we had a family or not. We were still becoming one. And it was the best feeling!!

Wait till the time is right for both of you. Your life DOES change dramatically when you have a child. It's all about the child!

Lisalou Posted: Apr 10, 2004 10:32 AM

Re: Question for those of you pregnant or already have children!!

I am currently 9 months pregnant and waited 2 years after our wedding to start TTC. We had a plan and followed through. I was no where near ready to start a family after our wedding even though we had been together 8 years prior to marriage. You both have to know when it's right. Sometimes it will be one not the other, but when you both are, it's the right time...
Good luck!

nov2004bride Posted: Apr 10, 2004 10:46 AM

Re: Question for those of you pregnant or already have children!!

Thank you everyone for your advice I think our family influences are not helping the subject either. Our siblings are saying wait a very long time and our parents are the opposite. I know everything happens for a reason. When the time is right I guess we will just know. Thanks again

MrsTC Posted: Apr 10, 2004 05:42 PM

Re: Question for those of you pregnant or already have children!!

don't listen to what everybody else has to say. when it's all said and done, it's when you and your DH are good and ready!! And you will know when that is!

TJW Posted: Apr 10, 2004 11:29 PM

Re: Question for those of you pregnant or already have children!!

I think that the key is that the 2 of you need to be on the same page - whether you wait or not. I had many people tell me that I should wait at least 6 mos to a year before starting a family. I got married at 36 and we had been together for 3 1/2 years before getting married. If I were younger I may have waited a little longer before starting a family. But my DH and I both agreed that this is what we wanted. I didnt want to test my odds and although it has been difficult, I dont think that it is any more difficult than for those that wait some time.

nov2004bride Posted: Apr 10, 2004 11:49 PM

Re: Question for those of you pregnant or already have children!!

My one worry about waiting is waiting too long and then finding out we have difficulty getting pregnant or that we can't get pregnant. I am such a worry wart. Sorry

Rainmama Posted: Apr 11, 2004 08:59 AM

Re: Question for those of you pregnant or already have children!!

Posted by IrishTracy

Our son was 22 months at our wedding. And yes there was a bit of 'We are already a family. This just makes it 'legal' But there is still that specialness about the day that didn't matter that we had a family or not. We were still becoming one. And it was the best feeling!!

We are in the same boat as Tracy. Our daughter will be 21 months when we get married. I think our wedding will be even more special since she will be able to take part in the ceremony.

Deb_n_Rob Posted: Apr 11, 2004 11:30 PM

Re: Question for those of you pregnant or already have children!!

We waited five years before having a baby. I'm glad we did wait because I feel we have a stronger relationship now. We have a lot of 'issues' that have been resolved. I don't regret waiting. We are having our first baby without any added stress. It's a great feeling.

IrishTracy Posted: Apr 12, 2004 09:08 AM

Re: Question for those of you pregnant or already have children!!

Posted by Rainmama

Posted by IrishTracy

Our son was 22 months at our wedding. And yes there was a bit of 'We are already a family. This just makes it 'legal' But there is still that specialness about the day that didn't matter that we had a family or not. We were still becoming one. And it was the best feeling!!

We are in the same boat as Tracy. Our daughter will be 21 months when we get married. I think our wedding will be even more special since she will be able to take part in the ceremony.

Our son was our BestMan. We thought the priest wasn't going to go for it. But, he said 'He should be up there with you' We couldn't believe it. (Obviouslly we had someone else sign the papers as a witness)