I was out to lunch with some of FH's friends wives the other day. All are married and 2 have new babies. They were discussing where they are in their lives and how they are so over the partying and bar scene.
Now, FH and I like to go out to eat and out for drinks. We also still enjoy going out with our friends and partying a bit. I don't go out that often but I still like to.
I felt uncomfortable, because I'm not where they are. I feel bad if we are all out to eat and I want to have a few glasses of wine. Next week we have a birthday party and I don't want to be the outcast because I want to enjoy myself.
I know things change when you have kids, but I still want to be myself.
So, my question is, where are you?
SoonToBeMrsScott
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Re: Random Question: Where are you?
I like to go out with friends and get a drink once in a while and maybe the club but I am not a fan of the partying and hanging out I like to hang at home with fh and the family instead
xXxNovember08xXx
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Re: Random Question: Where are you?
Fh does not drink anymore.. and i dont Drink liek i used to...
our best friends are gettign married... others married already...
we are both pretty much settling in and we are both pretty much done withteh hanging out , bar scene
Cutechef729
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Re: Random Question: Where are you?
I am kinda over the partying thing...most of my girlfriends are still dating, not engaged but we go out occasionally. I'm excited to settle down and have dinner parties and stuff and I'm only 24. But I do know what you're saying I wan't to still be able to have fun and hang out with my girlfriends even when I have a child.
Ayne11
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Re: Random Question: Where are you?
I'm definitely growing out of the bar/club scene. I would much rather have a bunch of friends over and chillax over dinner and a nice bottle of wine. Maybe play a little Rock Band
I feel weird now going out to bars being 29 and seeing rowdy 21 year olds having a blast while I'm straining to hear just one word of a conversation over the loud/horrible garage band that I paid a $10 cover to see.
I kinda feel like I'm too old to be hanging out in a bar all night. BUT I do do it every once in a while LOL.
NC1011
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Re: Random Question: Where are you?
FH and I still like to go out and have a good time. We just dont feel compelled to be out on the scene every weekend. Plus, I think our taste in night life has changed. We dont like to go to the same old bars that a lot of our single friends do but we like to go out, have a few drinks and meet people. And I'm sure we will still like to go out when we have kids. Not all the time, but you def need to get out every now and then IMO.
bella1028
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Re: Random Question: Where are you?
Sounds to me like I am at where you are....FH and I go out all the time...with friends, alone, for dinner, for drinks....I at this point in my life do not want children for some time and neither does FH....I think you should completely be yourself....you are not where they are and that's ok and I am sure there is a tiny piece of them that may want to be able to pick up and go out whenever they want to Both are good places to be
Autumn08
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Re: Random Question: Where are you?
I've always been more laid back and enjoy just going out for a few drinks and not so much partying. I was never the every weekend partyer but I'm not a stiff either. lol. Anyway I've noticed that my friends have calmed down more and they don't have kids. They are focusing on their careers and education more than they did in young twenties and late teens. So we will go out to eat or even a local bar for a few drinks and just relax.
jessamyn78
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Re: Random Question: Where are you?
Posted by bella1028
Sounds to m elikeI am at where you are....FH and I go out all the time...with friends, alone, for dinner, for drinks....I at this point in my life do not want children for some time and neither does FH....I think you should completely be yourself....you are not where they are and that's ok and I am sure there is a tiny piece of them that may want to be able to pick up and go out whenever they want to
We go out to dinner and out with our friends maybe once a month. I just don't want them to look down on me if we are all out to dinner and I have a few drinks. Last year we all had a house in Fire Island and I enjoyed playing flip cup and going out there but they just mostly stayed in and watched movies at night.
bella1028
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Re: Random Question: Where are you?
Posted by jessamyn78
Posted by bella1028
Sounds to m elikeI am at where you are....FH and I go out all the time...with friends, alone, for dinner, for drinks....I at this point in my life do not want children for some time and neither does FH....I think you should completely be yourself....you are not where they are and that's ok and I am sure there is a tiny piece of them that may want to be able to pick up and go out whenever they want to
We go out to dinner and out with our friends maybe once a month. I just don't want them to look down on me if we are all out to dinner and I have a few drinks. Last year we all had a house in Fire Island and I enjoyed playing flip cup and going out there but they just mostly stayed in and watched movies at night.
'
But you probably had a great time....I say do what you want to do and what will make you happiest...hopefully they will not judge you, that would be ridiculous....BTW, FH and I were in a house on FI for several years...where was yours?
Snick n Nick
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Re: Random Question: Where are you?
FH and I are both 24, and we are the first among families and friends getting married, although many are in serious relationships....we used to go out every weekend night, now it's usually more like once per weekend, between all of our work commitments and all that jazz.....
jessamyn78
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Re: Random Question: Where are you?
Posted by bella1028
Posted by jessamyn78
Posted by bella1028
Sounds to m elikeI am at where you are....FH and I go out all the time...with friends, alone, for dinner, for drinks....I at this point in my life do not want children for some time and neither does FH....I think you should completely be yourself....you are not where they are and that's ok and I am sure there is a tiny piece of them that may want to be able to pick up and go out whenever they want to
We go out to dinner and out with our friends maybe once a month. I just don't want them to look down on me if we are all out to dinner and I have a few drinks. Last year we all had a house in Fire Island and I enjoyed playing flip cup and going out there but they just mostly stayed in and watched movies at night.
'
But you probably had a great time....I say do what you want to do and what will make you happiest...hopefully they will not judge you, that would be ridiculous....BTW, FH and I were in a house on FI for several years...where was yours?
Ocean Bay Park. We actually met in FI and so dad a few of his friends and their wives.
dannisayz
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Re: Random Question: Where are you?
I still like to hang out and get silly with my girlfriends, but not as often as I used to. I much more content to stay in and watch movies with them though. We still drink and have a good time though.
I do miss going to punk shows every weekend, but that is when I was 'with the band' (my ex was a drummer). FH also plays, but my FH is not in a band. I look back at my old life and I miss the fun I used to have, but I am much happier with myself. I'm not 21 anymore; I'm almost 25. Almost 4 years have gone by and I've changed so much. I thought about it last night while going to sleep next to FH. He is the only man to ever understand me and I feel completely comfortable with him. I never felt that way with anyone else. It's how I know that my life is as it should be. It s*cks that I cannot be the little 'punk rock girl' I once was , but summer is coming and I can return to my old ways. Of course, after the wedding is over.
I have no intentions of having babies anytime soon. I need tenure first of all, plus I enjoy my free time. I want to travel. I want to party. I want to sleep in when I feel like it.
Butterfly123
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Re: Random Question: Where are you?
Posted by dannisayz I want to travel. I want to party. I want to sleep in when I feel like it.
Ditto, girl. Im still enjoying myself! I love to have a drink whenever I feel like it and go out on the weekends. I guess I dont feel like I have a time limit and I never wanna feel like that.
dannisayz
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Posted by Songstress
Posted by dannisayz I want to travel. I want to party. I want to sleep in when I feel like it.
Ditto, girl. Im still enjoying myself! I love to have a drink whenever I feel like it and go out on the weekends. I guess I dont feel like I have a time limit and I never wanna feel like that.
The only problem with my plan is that FH is 7 years older than I. (I'm 24; he's 31). I don't want him to be an old farty Dad.
Wifeynella
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Re: Random Question: Where are you?
we are definitely on the fringe of being 'there' as much as we like to go out and party we have started to enjoy being home more too.
Randilotus
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Re: Random Question: Where are you?
We are all over the place... we still go out and party once in a blue moon, but sometimes we have to much house stuff to do or we hang with our married friends who have children. I don't know where we are but we can fit all roles and I like that.
escobooker
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Re: Random Question: Where are you?
FH & I have a 3 1/2 yr old baby boy, we are still young, Im 25 hes 29 and we like to party sometimes, every few weeks we'll go out with a few friends some have kids some dont, well party or go out for drinks moderately, well go to strip clubs, you know do something different to keep the relationship interesting..lol..we are still a fun couple!! we are not into partying a lot like every weekend but we like to have fun sometimes...... We both partied a lot when we were just dating, when i was in my teens, so those times are over for us...sometimes hell go out with his buddies or Ill go out with my girls....just because you have kids it doesnt mean your life has to turn boring, not to say that having children is boring, but you can still do the things you like to do..Im grateful for having a wonderful fmil & parents who are always there to help out with my son whenever we want to do something or go somewhere...we are very lucky in that sense.. & just last night we decided that after the wedding we are gonna start trying for our 2nd baby...I hope its a girl!!! And we'll still party sometimes!!!
bluegreen08
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Re: Random Question: Where are you?
We were never huge partiers, although we definitely went out a lot more in college than we do now. I feel like a lot of my law school classmates are all about the bars but I prefer to stay in with FH and watch tv/movies, go out to dinner, hang out with friends for drinks, go to the casinos, etc.
It's not really age though, we're 23/24 and FH's 27 year old brother goes to bars, clubs, strip clubs on a regular basis and is much more of a partier because he is single.
We don't want to have kids for 4-5 years because I have 1 year left of law school and would like to work for at least a few years and travel & save up $$$.
ETA: many of our friends are single, none are married or have kids... many of them go out more than we do and are a bit wilder.
Maria31
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Re: Random Question: Where are you?
I am over the party scene. I still like to go out and have a few drinks over dinner, but I have no desire to go to a bar/club anymore. I used to be able to go out in the city Friday night, drink it up, get home at 5, wake up and do it all over again! Now I'm lucky if I stay up after 12. LOL FH calls me 'grandma'.
