Should have eloped.

chris1082 Posted: Sep 23, 2011 10:24 AM

Should have eloped.

Thanks SO much girls....I really needed to vent and you guys gave me really good suggestions.

I hope I didn't sound ungrateful....I do appreciate what they were trying to do and it wasn't done on purpose...BUT...this kinda leaves FH and I in a very bad spot

SoonToBeMrsCali Posted: Sep 23, 2011 10:26 AM

Re: Should have eloped.

FutureMRS.Benn Posted: Sep 23, 2011 10:27 AM

Re: Should have eloped.

Awwww sorry to hear that! We paid for our wedding ourselves and we too thought at the end we should have eloped.

You will find a way. Maybe you can take out a small loan to cover it and then pay it off with your wedding gifts?

IrishAli Posted: Sep 23, 2011 10:28 AM

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OMG. What did they suggest you do? So they offered to pay and now they are not?

IrishAli Posted: Sep 23, 2011 10:30 AM

Re: Should have eloped.

You have time to get a small loan and pay it back right away with gift money. Will his parents loan you the money so you don't have interest?

I am so sorry

MIL has a habit of doing this- so we asked both sets of parents to give us the cash up front so we could stay organized (if they were going to donate to the wedding fund). I am so sorry you are in this position

mybabylovesmoi Posted: Sep 23, 2011 10:32 AM

Re: Should have eloped.

WOWWWW...that is just wrong. I know things come up in life but really?! this last minute? I'm so sorry they can't help at ALL or they can't pay for the whole balance?

FDNYwife1029 Posted: Sep 23, 2011 10:36 AM

Re: Should have eloped.

I am soooooooo sorry girl.......... Your best bet is to probably take a small loan (hopefully you can get a 1yr with 0%apr) then just pay it back right after the wedding..

I feel your pain. we still have a huge balance. i wish we would have eloped too!

pjc92980 Posted: Sep 23, 2011 10:37 AM

Re: Should have eloped.

oh man that is terrible
is there anyway they can lay out the money for you and you pay them back after the wedding???

My in-laws did the same thing to us...they told us they couldnt give us $5000 that they promised. I am sure that is no where near what your balance is but to us it was still a lot bc we had a ton of stuff we already were paying for. anyway, DH gave his parents a lot of grief and in the end we got the money.

are the reasons they cant pay legitimate???

chris1082 Posted: Sep 23, 2011 10:38 AM

Re: Should have eloped.

PazzaRagazza Posted: Sep 23, 2011 10:39 AM

Re: Should have eloped.

Chris Im so sorry!!!! My best advice to you is start with a list. Make a list of everything tthat has a balance and needs to be paid ASAP.

Next-- look into personal loans form the bank. You will be able to reapy it post wedding ( i know this isnt the most IDEAL situation-- but its an idea)

Is there a family member you could borrow the money from (again not an ideal situation but doable) at one point we needed a large sum of money we borrowed from joeys parents and wrote up a contract (because i feel money makes things funny between family if there are no written accounts of it) we were able to pay it back on our time.

If you need any help and support you know we're all alaways here for you!

halfbaked Posted: Sep 23, 2011 10:42 AM

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I know it's a little frightening, but if you have enough money in your 401k, you can take a loan out of there. The penalties are minimal as long as you pay it back right away and I just feel better about it because you're borrowing from yourself. I've taken a loan out of my 401k and paid it back within 2 months. It was tough but it worked out just fine.

leesah85 Posted: Sep 23, 2011 10:57 AM

Re: Should have eloped.

do you have a rich family member (e.g. grandmother, aunt, etc.) that you can borrow the money from until after the wedding? we're probably gonna be about $2K short and i'm borrowing $$ from my grandmother and paying her back right after

sorry you're going through this

Moonmist09 Posted: Sep 23, 2011 10:59 AM

Re: Should have eloped.

did she give you a reason why she could not pay for it now?
I know things come up in life, but it is very unfair to tell your daughter this less than 1 month before the wedding - when she probably knew from before that they didn't have the funds for it.
However, youmentioned something before when you said this is your mom for you. Has she pulled this kind of thing on you before?
Do you have any extra money in savings to help you cover the balance? did you speak to your FH about this? what are his thoughts?

merelynn10 Posted: Sep 23, 2011 10:59 AM

Re: Should have eloped.

so sorry you have to go through this!

chris1082 Posted: Sep 23, 2011 11:03 AM

Re: Should have eloped.

Thanks so much for all the suggestions girls! You guys are the best!

I don't even have a 401K (I need a ned job ASAP) but FH does....so that's an option...

I have no savings....I bought a house 2 years ago and that kind of swallowed up my money...

And we have no one we can borrow from or that I'd feel comfortable asking....

FH says we'll figure it out. Thank goodness for him....my family is just mind boggling sometimes.

And I said this is my mom for you because this is something she would do....I don't think she wanted this to happen at all (I know she didn't) but this is unfair I think.