Should I be upset?

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Posted by soontobmrshammer

Honestly I don't believe that wearing black means you disapprove. I have many friends that have had there bridal party in black. I think it can be very elegant but that is just my opinion.

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I've seen it too, and I love Black/White weddings! I really only feel this way when it comes to parents.

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Posted by HoosierCouple

haaa i am laughing at this bc i am doing a black and white wedding so both mom's and my g-ma are wearing all black :) i guess it is a ny thing.
opps!

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Haha, and we are date twins!

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Posted by Debbie2011


is this true?!? my FMIL asked me if there was anything inparticular i wanted her to get in a dress (style, color, etc)... i just said floor length, but anything else would be fine. after finding a dress in black, she asked if that was okay, and truthfully, i thought it would look nice - elegant and formal.

do you think people will think that she's trying to make a statement? she could not be happier about our upcoming marriage, and i'd hate for people to think otherwise.

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Well I knew for sure MIL hated me an did it to be spiteful ALSO bc I told her MOH was wearing black. I personally think black is elegant.

I hope I'm not offending anyone with this thread ...

I should probably clarify that, if you are doing a black and white theme, the disapproving theory should go right out the window!

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Posted by jovigirl414

I hope I'm not offending anyone with this thread ...

I should probably clarify that, if you are doing a black and white theme, the disapproving theory should go right out the window!

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not offended at all - don't feel bad!

i just had no idea about this - really. thought other than white that all other colors were free-for-all!! :-P

Ummm, black would be theleast of my concerns....considering she's wearing freaking PANTS?!?! I'm sorry, but what the hell kind of woman wears pants to a wedding?!?!? Let alone her own son's wedding!!

I'm sorry girl, but if it were me, it would be a no go. You don't do that. How informal and inappropriate!

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Posted by Debbie2011

not offended at all - don't feel bad!

i just had no idea about this - really. thought other than white that all other colors were free-for-all!! :-P

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I'll be honest with you, I didn't know about black being bad for parents to wear until I started wedding planning. My thing is, that I specifically told FMIL this, as well as my mother, and she still bought something black to wear. That's why I have an issue ... If I never said anything about it, then who knows if she was aware of this, and I couldn't get upset, you know?

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Posted by Soon2bMrsB91511

Ummm, black would be theleast of my concerns....considering she's wearing freaking PANTS?!?! I'm sorry, but what the hell kind of woman wears pants to a wedding?!?!? Let alone her own son's wedding!!

I'm sorry girl, but if it were me, it would be a no go. You don't do that. How informal and inappropriate!

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Haha ... you are right ... that's a whole other issue!! I guess I'm picking the wrong battle, huh?

pants or color ... color or pants ... hmmm ... lol

At the end of the day, no matter what she wears - you're still marrying her son, and promising to spend your life with him . Let her wear the black pants, you and your FH's love will be the center of attention no matter what

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Posted by adelz

At the end of the day, no matter what she wears - you're still marrying her son, and promising to spend your life with him . Let her wear the black pants, you and your FH's love will be the center of attention no matter what

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I wish I could be as calm and positive as you!!!

I must be one of the odds ones out because my mother, who is walking down the aisle, is wearing pants. She had not worn a dress since her own wedding day 40+ years ago. She is also wearing a dark navy pant suit (looks almost black). I have absolutley no problems with it.

As long as her outfit is fancy enough I don't see causing drama over it. JMO

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Posted by jovigirl414

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Posted by adelz

At the end of the day, no matter what she wears - you're still marrying her son, and promising to spend your life with him . Let her wear the black pants, you and your FH's love will be the center of attention no matter what

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I wish I could be as calm and positive as you!!!

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Everything will work out - and whether she's in black pants or a tie-dye dress, there's certain things that are just not worth stressing over, especially when it won't affect your day! Hang in there!

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Posted by Im getting Married

I must be one of the odds ones out because my mother, who is walking down the aisle, is wearing pants. She had not worn a dress since her own wedding day 40+ years ago. She is also wearing a dark navy pant suit (looks almost black). I have absolutley no problems with it.

As long as her outfit is fancy enough I don't see causing drama over it. JMO

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The way she is describing pants and a blouse, I don't see it being very fancy. My mom is wearing a gorgeous dress (in my album), and FMIL's reaction to seeing it was 'I can't wear anything that flowy' ... So who knows ...

the only time pants are acceptable is if they are the flowy pants that look like a long skirt, but to me at that point youmights well where a long skirt!!

I think black is elegant, my MOHs mom wore black to her sons wedding, only because she tried on 87334 dresses and the only one she liked that fit nice and that looked flattering on her was a black one.

Shoes you can find for any outfit, so what diff does it make if she is wearin a long skirt or long pants??

Excuses....

Can you get a picture of what she is going to wear to show us? If she was wearing all black then that would concern me because it does say she disapproves of the wedding.

As for the pants, my Grandmother who never wears dresses or skirts told me she is wearing a dressy pants suit. I told her go right ahead! She picked one out and its actually close to the color my FMIL is wearing. I was like opps but told her to order and wear it anyways!

At the end of the day, its you and your FH getting married. Let your FMIL do whatever she wants to do about her attire. It seems like she wants to get you riled up and looks like it worked.

I'm somewhat in the same boat as you as far as FMIL is concerned. Mine wants to also wear black because no other color besides that looks good on her. I hated it with a passion & FH threw my right under the bus when we were at his house making me seem like a bridezilla! When my mom & I went shopping for her MOB dress she liked one dress but they had it in black & she liked/wanted it & I told her no but found a dress 100% better in Indigo (dark blue).. now why can't FMIL do that?!?!? But I think wearing a black gown would be better than the pants. But don't let it stress you out, your going to be the beautiful bride with all the attention!!!!

I'm a big fan of letting people wear whatever they want...in truth, the only person whose outfit people are going notice is yours. And I've seen MOG and MOBs wear black all the time to weddings, its a slimming color and a lot of people prefer it. I do agree that pants might not be the way to go, but definitely think about whether this is a battle you want to fight or not! JMO though

Yeah, I am definitely more concerned about the pants....

WT*F?

What she wears doesn't reflect on you. It reflects on her. Just say to her, whatever you choose, you have to be happy with. These pictures will be around forever regardless of how much you like what you wore. So choose wisely.
I told MOG what my mom was wearing, a cobalt blue gown, so she got a red gown she loves. FFIL doesn't want to wear a tux and I really don't care. He realizes he has to stand in pictures next to his son who is wearing a tux and he's find with that.
Who cares what other people think? If you guests think she looks out of place, oh well. That's her own doing. I'd warn her once and let it be. There are so many other things to stress about that are in your control, this just isn't one of them. Say your piece and move on.