Are you girls inviting people from FH's family that you've never met? His family mostly lives in another state, and I really haven't met most of his aunts or cousins. My mom said I shouldn't invite them to the shower because we know they can't afford to travel here, and it would seem like I was asking for a gift. FMIL thinks every female on the guest list should be invited to the shower, I flat out told her no to that one. I awlays thought showers were for close friends and family, but what about family you've never met?
brittndave
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if they're family and you know they're not going to come anyway then it doesn't hurt to invite them
AwaitingAugust
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i would not invite them.
i only invited people that i actually wanted to have there (and FMIL & FSIL )
SoontobeMrs.Brown
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Posted by AwaitingAugust
i would not invite them.
i only invited people that i actually wanted to have there (and FMIL & FSIL )
AND IS HYSTERICAL
AdriandSteve
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I did but it was just 1 and they live in Texas and wouldn't come anyway. I'd only invite immediate fam members who you've never met.
AshnJess110610
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Posted by AwaitingAugust
i would not invite them.
i only invited people that i actually wanted to have there (and FMIL & FSIL )
Jna2010
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i would invite them, theyre going to be your family too, so its either you meet them now or at the wedding.... also your fmil i think should have guests of her own there as well as you are her fdil.... even if they cant come, you should still invite them... jmo
AshnJess110610
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Posted by Jna2010
i would invite them, theyre going to be your family too, so its either you meet them now or at the wedding.... also your fmil i think should have guests of her own there as well as you are her fdil.... even if they cant come, you should still invite them... jmo[/QUOTE
FMIL won't be at the shower. She lives out of state and can't afford to travel here for the shower. I think I'll just invite his aunts and cousins, its just strange because he barely even knows them, he doesn't even know how old they are. FIL's are always fighting with the rest of the family, thats why I don't know how to handle this. I don't want to get in the middle. ]
AwaitingAugust
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Posted by Jna2010 your fmil i think should have guests of her own there
i would only agree to this if FMIL was helping to pay for it. why should her parents / BP pay for these random people she's never met before?
AshnJess110610
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Posted by AwaitingAugust
Posted by Jna2010 your fmil i think should have guests of her own there
i would only agree to this if FMIL was helping to pay for it. why should her parents / BP pay for these random people she's never met before?
I see what you mean, but I'm not looking at it from a financial stand point. I feel his family should be there as much as mine, its just odd because his whole family isn't close with one another. We've been together 4 years and I've only seen most of them a total of 3 times.
AwaitingAugust
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Posted by AshnJess110610
I'm not looking at it from a financial stand point. I feel his family should be there as much as mine, its just odd because his whole family isn't close with one another. We've been together 4 years and I've only seen most of them a total of 3 times.
well, if money's no object, then you def should invite them to avoid drama, at the very least ... but you shouldn't feel like you HAVE to
AshnJess110610
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Posted by AwaitingAugust
Posted by AshnJess110610
I'm not looking at it from a financial stand point. I feel his family should be there as much as mine, its just odd because his whole family isn't close with one another. We've been together 4 years and I've only seen most of them a total of 3 times.
well, if money's no object, then you def should invite them to avoid drama, at the very least ... but you shouldn't feel like you HAVE to
Oh moneys def an object. My MOH is my 22 year old sister I def. don't expect her to be able to lay out a lof of money.
Jna2010
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Posted by AwaitingAugust
Posted by Jna2010 your fmil i think should have guests of her own there
i would only agree to this if FMIL was helping to pay for it. why should her parents / BP pay for these random people she's never met before?
i come from a different background, i see it as your marrying into the family you should want to have them there and get to know them. what if fmil is not in a good financial position? youre not going to invite youre fh's aunts or cousins or anything because she cant afford to pay for them? JMO but i just dont see that as right.
lela7378
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You still have to invite them. Even if they can't afford to.. .it is courtesy. Don't invite far off cousins that are removed like 3x though
AshnJess110610
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Posted by Jna2010
Posted by AwaitingAugust
Posted by Jna2010 your fmil i think should have guests of her own there
i would only agree to this if FMIL was helping to pay for it. why should her parents / BP pay for these random people she's never met before?
i come from a different background, i see it as your marrying into the family you should want to have them there and get to know them. what if fmil is not in a good financial position? youre not going to invite youre fh's aunts or cousins or anything because she cant afford to pay for them? JMO but i just dont see that as right.
Absolutely not, idk if you saw my post before this, but me not being sure about inviting them had nothing to do with fmil not paying. I would never expect her to pay for guests because I didn't know them. My original post was me just asking if it was rude to send invites to people that don't know me. I didn't want them to feel like they had to send a gift, especially the out of state people.
Jna2010
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Posted by AshnJess110610
Posted by Jna2010
Posted by AwaitingAugust
Posted by Jna2010 your fmil i think should have guests of her own there
i would only agree to this if FMIL was helping to pay for it. why should her parents / BP pay for these random people she's never met before?
i come from a different background, i see it as your marrying into the family you should want to have them there and get to know them. what if fmil is not in a good financial position? youre not going to invite youre fh's aunts or cousins or anything because she cant afford to pay for them? JMO but i just dont see that as right.
Absolutely not, idk if you saw my post before this, but me not being sure about inviting them had nothing to do with fmil not paying. I would never expect her to pay for guests because I didn't know them. My original post was me just asking if it was rude to send invites to people that don't know me. I didn't want them to feel like they had to send a gift, especially the out of state people.
yeah i saw it, sorry for the ocnfusions, i was just responding to awaiting august my thoughts on the whole paying aspect
Ray8183
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Posted by Jna2010
Posted by AshnJess110610
Posted by Jna2010
Posted by AwaitingAugust
Posted by Jna2010 your fmil i think should have guests of her own there
i would only agree to this if FMIL was helping to pay for it. why should her parents / BP pay for these random people she's never met before?
i come from a different background, i see it as your marrying into the family you should want to have them there and get to know them. what if fmil is not in a good financial position? youre not going to invite youre fh's aunts or cousins or anything because she cant afford to pay for them? JMO but i just dont see that as right.
Absolutely not, idk if you saw my post before this, but me not being sure about inviting them had nothing to do with fmil not paying. I would never expect her to pay for guests because I didn't know them. My original post was me just asking if it was rude to send invites to people that don't know me. I didn't want them to feel like they had to send a gift, especially the out of state people.
I agree with Joanna, in my family we invite all the women on both side even if they couldn't come. Yes, you may not know everyone, but they are still your family.
yeah i saw it, sorry for the ocnfusions, i was just responding to awaiting august my thoughts on the whole paying aspect
DaniandKen2010
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I put every female I know on the shower list whether they are OOT or in state because I didnt want to hear about how they werent invited and I put all of the FH's female fam members I know on the list.
AshnJess110610
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thanks girls
GiannisWifey
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Posted by Jna2010
i come from a different background, i see it as your marrying into the family you should want to have them there and get to know them. what if fmil is not in a good financial position? youre not going to invite youre fh's aunts or cousins or anything because she cant afford to pay for them? JMO but i just dont see that as right.
THIS. this is the exact way I see it and my mother wouldn't let it be any other way. I am marrying into his family and she would even want FH family to be there so she can meet and get to know them better.
