So I am a Grandmother...

I agree with Anneandchris. I am not a mom so I have no way of even understanding how you feel. I have friends who were pregnant very young and with the love and support of their families & friends life turned out really well. I hope everyone is healthy and hope that you will be back to being close to your daughter soon. At only 18 years old to have finished 6 semesters of college already, she must be a hard worker and intelligent. Planned or not, they are parents and you are young enough to enjoy a long life with your grand baby.

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Posted by RKellner

I can understand you being upset for her lying to you and hiding it from you the whole time...
But if she had came to you and told you she was pregnant what would you have done and said?
what exactly are you the most upset over, the fact that she hid it or the fact that you are a grandmother at 39?
I dont want this to sound rude but a baby is a blessing no matter what...
Maybe you should be happy and look at you GRANDCHILD and give that baby a kiss....
Just the way you came off and said what you said, is wrong in my opinion...That BABY is YOUR grandchild...
Congrats to your daughter.. I wont say congrats to you because you dont want to hear that and I personally dont think you deserve a congrats after the way you spoke of the baby...

I only say this the way I do because I came home pregnant at 20 and my parents accepted me AND my daughter.. And my daughter means more to my parents then anything in this world...
They never would have talked about my baby the way you are of your grandchild....

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i didn't see jody talking about her grandchild in a horrible way at all...she even mentioned that she was not upset about the baby at all she was upset that her daughter lied to her. I know my mom would be pissed as well if i lied to her about having a child!! And although jody said she didn't want to be a grandmother at 39--I can say not many people do. That is young and he rdaughter is young and she probably feels she wanted a great life for her daughter...and for her daughter to go to school and do things i guess 'the traditional way'

Jody I understand you being upset and wanting to express your feelings...you have a right. I know if I came home at 18 with a baby my mother would have flipped as well (she is very catholic) and she always has wanted me to do things the 'right' way and go to school enjoy my life and when I am physcially and financially ready to have a child to do so!! I know my mom would accept the baby just as I know you will. but I know she would have been pissed for me lying to her as well

But like futuremulligan said...maybe she was scared of your reaction and didn't tell yuo because you would flip...which did make it worse but...take a step back and see what a blessing you have in front of you...a new grandchild to love and spoil etc. And your daughter probably needs you now more than ever...especially if she is coming home with the baby. I know you are feeling hurt and upset...but your daughter needs love as well as you and whats a better way than to show it to each other love....maybe sit down and talk to yuor daughter...i know initial reaction is to scream and stuff but now that it's done....talk to her and let her tell you why she didn't tell you about her pregnancy and why you were upset with her.

GOOD LUCK!!!!!!!!!!

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Posted by RKellner

I can understand you being upset for her lying to you and hiding it from you the whole time...
But if she had came to you and told you she was pregnant what would you have done and said?
what exactly are you the most upset over, the fact that she hid it or the fact that you are a grandmother at 39?
I dont want this to sound rude but a baby is a blessing no matter what...
Maybe you should be happy and look at you GRANDCHILD and give that baby a kiss....
Just the way you came off and said what you said, is wrong in my opinion...That BABY is YOUR grandchild...
Congrats to your daughter.. I wont say congrats to you because you dont want to hear that and I personally dont think you deserve a congrats after the way you spoke of the baby...

I only say this the way I do because I came home pregnant at 20 and my parents accepted me AND my daughter.. And my daughter means more to my parents then anything in this world...
They never would have talked about my baby the way you are of your grandchild....

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not everyone feels the way your parents did when they have a child who has an unplanned pregnancy - i dont think she is wrong for being upset - this is a HUGE deal and i am sure jody is feeling a lot of emotions right now - especially b/c this was kept from her - even after she ASKED her daughter...i dont think its that easy to feel blessed when you are hurting and feel betrayed

OHHHHH GODDDDD
WELL CONGRATS

I can only offer you lots of hugs

Feeling betrayed is a hard thing to get over but eventually everything will work out.

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Posted by Future Mulligan

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Posted by RKellner

I can understand you being upset for her lying to you and hiding it from you the whole time...
But if she had came to you and told you she was pregnant what would you have done and said?
what exactly are you the most upset over, the fact that she hid it or the fact that you are a grandmother at 39?
I dont want this to sound rude but a baby is a blessing no matter what...
Maybe you should be happy and look at you GRANDCHILD and give that baby a kiss....
Just the way you came off and said what you said, is wrong in my opinion...That BABY is YOUR grandchild...
Congrats to your daughter.. I wont say congrats to you because you dont want to hear that and I personally dont think you deserve a congrats after the way you spoke of the baby...

I only say this the way I do because I came home pregnant at 20 and my parents accepted me AND my daughter.. And my daughter means more to my parents then anything in this world...
They never would have talked about my baby the way you are of your grandchild....

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not everyone feels the way your parents did when they have a child who has an unplanned pregnancy - i dont think she is wrong for being upset - this is a HUGE deal and i am sure jody is feeling a lot of emotions right now - especially b/c this was kept from her - even after she ASKED her daughter...i dont think its that easy to feel blessed when you are hurting and feel betrayed

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I understand what you are saying...
But parents are there to support their children in what they do and stand behind them.. She has every right to feel disappointed but should stand behind her....
My mother went home at 16 7 months pregnant before she told her parents...
She should be proud that her daughter kept the baby and is doing what she needs to do to care for that baby

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Posted by RKellner

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Posted by Future Mulligan

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Posted by RKellner

I can understand you being upset for her lying to you and hiding it from you the whole time...
But if she had came to you and told you she was pregnant what would you have done and said?
what exactly are you the most upset over, the fact that she hid it or the fact that you are a grandmother at 39?
I dont want this to sound rude but a baby is a blessing no matter what...
Maybe you should be happy and look at you GRANDCHILD and give that baby a kiss....
Just the way you came off and said what you said, is wrong in my opinion...That BABY is YOUR grandchild...
Congrats to your daughter.. I wont say congrats to you because you dont want to hear that and I personally dont think you deserve a congrats after the way you spoke of the baby...

I only say this the way I do because I came home pregnant at 20 and my parents accepted me AND my daughter.. And my daughter means more to my parents then anything in this world...
They never would have talked about my baby the way you are of your grandchild....

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not everyone feels the way your parents did when they have a child who has an unplanned pregnancy - i dont think she is wrong for being upset - this is a HUGE deal and i am sure jody is feeling a lot of emotions right now - especially b/c this was kept from her - even after she ASKED her daughter...i dont think its that easy to feel blessed when you are hurting and feel betrayed

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I understand what you are saying...
But parents are there to support their children in what they do and stand behind them.. She has every right to feel disappointed but should stand behind her....
My mother went home at 16 7 months pregnant before she told her parents...
She should be proud that her daughter kept the baby and is doing what she needs to do to care for that baby

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i dont know, i guess i disagree - i dont think that keeping the baby is always the right thing to do - thats not how i was raised and maybe thats b/c i am pro choice - but thats just me and my beliefs - i dont think people should be praised for having children young just because they decided to continue with the pregnancy - i think that for some people its not the right choice - but that isnt the point here at all.....i think jody is really hurt and its understandable - and i dont think its easy to take all of it in right now - im not a mom, but i know that if my 17 yr old sister waited until AFTER she had a baby to tell me id be really hurt and pissed - and she isnt even my daughter - thats just my sister - and i cant imagine all the feelings i would have about it

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Posted by Future Mulligan

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Posted by RKellner

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Posted by Future Mulligan

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Posted by RKellner

I can understand you being upset for her lying to you and hiding it from you the whole time...
But if she had came to you and told you she was pregnant what would you have done and said?
what exactly are you the most upset over, the fact that she hid it or the fact that you are a grandmother at 39?
I dont want this to sound rude but a baby is a blessing no matter what...
Maybe you should be happy and look at you GRANDCHILD and give that baby a kiss....
Just the way you came off and said what you said, is wrong in my opinion...That BABY is YOUR grandchild...
Congrats to your daughter.. I wont say congrats to you because you dont want to hear that and I personally dont think you deserve a congrats after the way you spoke of the baby...

I only say this the way I do because I came home pregnant at 20 and my parents accepted me AND my daughter.. And my daughter means more to my parents then anything in this world...
They never would have talked about my baby the way you are of your grandchild....

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not everyone feels the way your parents did when they have a child who has an unplanned pregnancy - i dont think she is wrong for being upset - this is a HUGE deal and i am sure jody is feeling a lot of emotions right now - especially b/c this was kept from her - even after she ASKED her daughter...i dont think its that easy to feel blessed when you are hurting and feel betrayed

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I understand what you are saying...
But parents are there to support their children in what they do and stand behind them.. She has every right to feel disappointed but should stand behind her....
My mother went home at 16 7 months pregnant before she told her parents...
She should be proud that her daughter kept the baby and is doing what she needs to do to care for that baby

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i dont know, i guess i disagree - i dont think that keeping the baby is always the right thing to do - thats not how i was raised and maybe thats b/c i am pro choice - but thats just me and my beliefs - i dont think people should be praised for having children young just because they decided to continue with the pregnancy - i think that for some people its not the right choice - but that isnt the point here at all.....i think jody is really hurt and its understandable - and i dont think its easy to take all of it in right now - im not a mom, but i know that if my 17 yr old sister waited until AFTER she had a baby to tell me id be really hurt and pissed - and she isnt even my daughter - thats just my sister - and i cant imagine all the feelings i would have about it

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Youre right.. everyone has their own beliefs...
I didnt ay she should be praised for keeping the baby..
But obviously thats what her daughter wanted... And keeping the baby was the right choice for her daughter...
I stated my opinion on it and i didnt mean for it to turn into an argument of any sort..
I am only saying what I say because I had a baby young and my mother had a baby young...
Obviously her daughter didnt feel secure enough to tell her mother.. Now is the time to stand behind her daughter and show her that yes while she is hurt that she was left in the dark she will stand behind her....
She said 'the daughter she USED to be proud of'.... Thats not starting off on the right path... And in her original post saying she sees her daughter, her bf, and this.... baby... I personally think that was a little disgusting saying it that way....
That... BABY is her grandchild.. Take pride in this precious little life that is her blood... She shouldnt take it out on the baby... Thats all I am saying...

I can't even imagine what you must be going through. I hope that you and your family find peace

Not sure what this poster is talking about.. she didnt say anything bad or horrible about the baby!! You are totally out of line here.. She specifically said she was upset that her daughter LIED TO HER!! Nothing to do with the baby though.

I believe when the OP is ready...she will ask for our congrats and I for one will be very happy to give her a big old CONGRATULATIONS!!! with lots of hugs for her, her daughter and her grandchild!!!

I would suggest you carefully read the original posts better before you post such a scathing, hurtful response!!



Im sad for her to have had to read that post!!

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Posted by wifetobe

Not sure what this poster is talking about.. she didnt say anything bad or horrible about the baby!! You are totally out of line here.. She specifically said she was upset that her daughter LIED TO HER!! Nothing to do with the baby though.

I believe when the OP is ready...she will ask for our congrats and I for one will be very happy to give her a big old CONGRATULATIONS!!! with lots of hugs for her, her daughter and her grandchild!!!

I would suggest you carefully read the original posts better before you post such a scathing, hurtful response!!



Im sad for her to have had to read that post!!

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ITA ... she has a right to be hurt and disappointed that her 18 year old lied to her and had a child . yes she will get used to it and adjust, but she has a right to be shocked , angry and disappointed that her daughter had a child so young and out of wedlock. my parents would have disowned me if i ' shamed ' them with a child without being married.I am not judging other people's decisions who have children young or not married, but I would have a huge issue if it was my son or daughter

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Posted by RKellner

I can understand you being upset for her lying to you and hiding it from you the whole time...
But if she had came to you and told you she was pregnant what would you have done and said?
what exactly are you the most upset over, the fact that she hid it or the fact that you are a grandmother at 39?
I dont want this to sound rude but a baby is a blessing no matter what...
Maybe you should be happy and look at you GRANDCHILD and give that baby a kiss....
Just the way you came off and said what you said, is wrong in my opinion...That BABY is YOUR grandchild...
Congrats to your daughter.. I wont say congrats to you because you dont want to hear that and I personally dont think you deserve a congrats after the way you spoke of the baby...

I only say this the way I do because I came home pregnant at 20 and my parents accepted me AND my daughter.. And my daughter means more to my parents then anything in this world...
They never would have talked about my baby the way you are of your grandchild....

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I think this is a bit harsh! She hasnt even had 24 hours to find out. Jody prob has a LOAD of emotions right now. No matter what,, I would be P'od that my child hid something like this and lied... she is an adult.. and made maybe a wrong choice in lying but Jody has the right to be upset and confused right now

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Posted by Future Mulligan

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Posted by RKellner

I can understand you being upset for her lying to you and hiding it from you the whole time...
But if she had came to you and told you she was pregnant what would you have done and said?
what exactly are you the most upset over, the fact that she hid it or the fact that you are a grandmother at 39?
I dont want this to sound rude but a baby is a blessing no matter what...
Maybe you should be happy and look at you GRANDCHILD and give that baby a kiss....
Just the way you came off and said what you said, is wrong in my opinion...That BABY is YOUR grandchild...
Congrats to your daughter.. I wont say congrats to you because you dont want to hear that and I personally dont think you deserve a congrats after the way you spoke of the baby...

I only say this the way I do because I came home pregnant at 20 and my parents accepted me AND my daughter.. And my daughter means more to my parents then anything in this world...
They never would have talked about my baby the way you are of your grandchild....

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not everyone feels the way your parents did when they have a child who has an unplanned pregnancy - i dont think she is wrong for being upset - this is a HUGE deal and i am sure jody is feeling a lot of emotions right now - especially b/c this was kept from her - even after she ASKED her daughter...i dont think its that easy to feel blessed when you are hurting and feel betrayed

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WOW you just summed up my feelings all to well at this point.. Everyone is telling me to feel blessed, which I am sure I will once I process this... I mean I thought my daughter and I were CLOSE we shared everything then she blatantly lied to me when I asked her if she was pregnant... Then this.. I am just so Shocked, Hurt, Betrayed, I don't know how to process those feelings with her, which I need to do before I embrace the 'blessing of a Granchild'. And yes let's top it off that all the hopes and dreams I had for my child came crashing down around me... Oh and the fact i wasn't ready to be a grandmother this young. I mean I can't say anything bad about the child which by the way his name is Blake Charles and he is cute... but I HAVE to deal with the hurt of my daughter lying to me before anything else. That might take some time because I have NEVER felt this way toward her before...EVER. I mean damn they told HIS family who was there at the hospital, bought them baby stuff EVERYTHING. Here I am the ******* who knew nothing and his father didn't even have the guts to let me know... no one did. I am just so hurt...

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Posted by Kimbalina

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Posted by RKellner

I can understand you being upset for her lying to you and hiding it from you the whole time...
But if she had came to you and told you she was pregnant what would you have done and said?
what exactly are you the most upset over, the fact that she hid it or the fact that you are a grandmother at 39?
I dont want this to sound rude but a baby is a blessing no matter what...
Maybe you should be happy and look at you GRANDCHILD and give that baby a kiss....
Just the way you came off and said what you said, is wrong in my opinion...That BABY is YOUR grandchild...
Congrats to your daughter.. I wont say congrats to you because you dont want to hear that and I personally dont think you deserve a congrats after the way you spoke of the baby...

I only say this the way I do because I came home pregnant at 20 and my parents accepted me AND my daughter.. And my daughter means more to my parents then anything in this world...
They never would have talked about my baby the way you are of your grandchild....

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I think this is a bit harsh! She hasnt even had 24 hours to find out. Jody prob has a LOAD of emotions right now. No matter what,, I would be P'od that my child hid something like this and lied... she is an adult.. and made maybe a wrong choice in lying but Jody has the right to be upset and confused right now

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I agree your parents had 9 months to get used to it and if she had those months then she would probally be jumping for joy right now but she needs to get used to the idea and get over being mad at her daughter. I think she was just venting and needed some support since she wasn't getting it at home.