Hey ladies.. Well since this is my last week of Grad school ( for this semester) and since since Things are beginning to calm down once my finals are over. I finally got a second to pop on here and say hello..
So the first batch of my invites came in wrong so now that I finally got htem all assembled and written out.. they are going out tomorrow and Wednesday! YAY!!
Second order of news... My FMIL just gave me her 'list of a few people for the wedding' well a few people was 30!!! OMG! ***!! does she think im F*((*&&^()n made of money! That'sanother 5 grand plus if I actually allowed them to come.. Ok so I sound like a Bridezilla but the other half of hte story istht she already added an extra 25 CLOSE people to the list.. now that the invites are going out she gives me ANOTHER LIST! so now I have to confront her becuase FH doesn't want to ERRRRRRRRR! Can I Scream .. hopefully loud enough so she can hear me! she wanted to stuff the envelopes with me...sooooo.. I just finished htem ALL BY MYSELF! she really upset me and hurt my feelings by thinking she could add 30 more people,. I mean we are not talking about 5-10... I can't afford another 30 .. bottom line. So if she wants them there then she can pay for them! errr thanks for listening girls!!!! Talk to you soon!Any advice would be helpful
debismom
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Re: Sorry I've been MIA update on MIL drama and more!
Kimberly, honey, I'm sorry you're being put on the spot like that!! and prayers for smoother sailing!!!!!!! Mary MOB
jeffamanda080808
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This is just my opinion........ If she wants another 30 invited...then she pays for those 30 and the cost of the additional invites. I just don't think that it's fair to add 30 people a few days before the invites are to go out.
MichBride
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Kim- I am SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO with you on this. My FMIL has been giving me invitation issues as well-- people really have a lot of nerve to request so much when they are not even contributing. It makes me sooo mad but im trying my best not to let her rain on my parade!
JTsGal829
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Posted by jeffamanda080808
This is just my opinion........ If she wants another 30 invited...then she pays for those 30 and the cost of the additional invites. I just don't think that it's fair to add 30 people a few days before the invites are to go out.
those were my thoughts exactly. She can't expect you to add that many people who happen to be friends of hers unless she iplans on chipping in on the cost!!!
angl2001
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what happened when you talked to her?? or did you not talk to her yet??? are these people family???
id be pisssssed too!! thats so wrong!
mariaobride
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aww that stinks that you are being put on the spot I am sorry you have to go through that you are doing the right thing by confronting her
anamaree77
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Ummm why does everyone seem to forget t his is OUR WEDDING??!??!? and what do you mean FH won't confront her???? I would simply tell him that i'm not going to say anything to her either and I am NOT sending out the 30 invites so it's his problem. how ruuuuuuuuude!
bluekat16
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FH should really talk to her and tell him you guys simply can't afford another 30 people. That if she wants to add them she will have to pay for them. HE should be the one to talk to her,..not you...that just sets tings up badly between both of you.
Hope things work out!
AR31
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it would be best if FH talks to her.. you don't want to burn and bridges right before.. or maybe she feels bad and is being cajoled into inviting them.. either way.. FH has to talk.. g'luck
MrsHtobe
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Posted by JTsGal829
Posted by jeffamanda080808
This is just my opinion........ If she wants another 30 invited...then she pays for those 30 and the cost of the additional invites. I just don't think that it's fair to add 30 people a few days before the invites are to go out.
those were my thoughts exactly. She can't expect you to add that many people who happen to be friends of hers unless she iplans on chipping in on the cost!!!
ITA. . I mean, it probably depends on how much she is giving already and how many people total she has put on the list - but at the end of the day, you just need to tell her that you don't have the $5k to fork out for all these people this late. Had the convo come up earlier than you sending out your invitations, you might have been able to put more $ away.
But I would have FH talk to her. . . .
kimandvin
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THanks!! I am jsut ahving difficulty with FH.. he gets all defensive when I bring up the subject ,, It will be an extra 5grand that I don't have .. Im a full time Grad student and working FT to pay off this wedding> So I don't have anymore money to shed out.... I was going to have him talk to her but he's beinig ridiculous over this whole thing acting like its my fault! My mom and me and Fh cut people off of OUR lists.. why should she be allowed to put ane xtra 30 on.. Coming from a mother.. Do you have an suggestions as to how I can approach this wtih her.. She gets a little defensive as well,,, Thanks! Kim. PS. If its long feel free to FM me! I appreciate it!
kimandvin
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they are half family ( distant that Ive never met in the five years weve been togther) and half friends! no Id dint work up enough nerve to goa nd talk to her.. was debating on writing her a letter!
kimandvin
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I agree but I tried to tell him again tonight..w ell asked him if he spoke to her yte and hes like well Im not. and I just simply told him wel the invites arent going out! theres no more money! its 5 grand not a few hundred!
kimandvin
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OK.. So she gave us some money ( the same as my parents gave us) which relaly only covered lke 2 vendors Im gratefull for anything that I have gotten as it'smade my life easier.. Since I make a lot more money than FH does I have been paying most of the bills out of my paycheck and have not had any money to put aside to pay bills and what not.. therefor even if she did tell me earlier. I already worked out having approx 185-200 people at the wedding. Right now not including her EXTRA! list we have 240.. so that gives us room to breath! HOPEFULLY. bu add another 32 on that thats 272 guests and we just dont have the funds. Im paying for my college myself (grad school at 790 a friggin credit) so I really dont have roomt o budge. Im also working FT and not as many hours as I did when I was not in Grad school.. Bottom line is that I feel like FH should stick up for me and for some reason he's not.. He just doesnt want to deal with it.. By the way she pulled thsi wtih the other sons wedding last year!! VERY NERVY!!! iWhat do you girls think of me writing her a letter ,. I feel like if I confront her she's going to take it the wrong way? TIA!! So much!
mRm2008
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I am so sorry that is happening to you. My MOH had a similar problem with her own Mother inviting a ton of people in addition to the first group of guests she had on the list.
My MOH asked her Mother to pay for all those guests or they would not be able to attend. It actually worked out well, her Mother reducing the list AND paying for those who attended.
It actually worked out well. I hope you can work it out w/ your MIL
lizzie217
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Aww....hun Im sorry this is annoying! It is FH's mom and his responsibility to handle IMO
jeanne08
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Soon 2b Mrs Bev
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aww!!! im so sorry you are vgoing theu this right before your invites go out!!
if your FMIL wants the extra guests she should pay for them and im sorry but your FH should grow a pair and say something to his mother !!! Its not fair to you that you have to say something to her!!
kimandvin
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I agree.. as of now nothing is resolved and unfortunately we do have enough invites but they are not being sent out unless she pays up!! we got 25 extra from the frist batch that got messed up andthe woman let me keep them and we ordered 25 extra! THanks girls for listening to me! I will keep you posted on this nonsense drama!
