Spin Off to wedding cost...what about wedding gifts???
Original post by Notwedyet08
I'm just wondering...do you find people here in NY (especially those familar with Long Island weddings) give bigger gifts than those in other areas??
I would say a gift is a gift; no matter where you live. BUT is that because i live in NY and know what typical weddings in this area cost? B/c that doesn't seem to be the case (at least not what i'm finding). I would give a gift of $200-$250+ up for a wedding. But my friend was telling me how she went a wedding in Baltimore Big 200+ person wedding. And the wedding gift she got them was a $40 vacuum off their registry b/c she said that was the least expensive biggest gift she could find.
Isn't the registry typically for the shower; and then for people that maybe couldn't 'make the wedding? I could never imagine going to a wedding at say Jericho Terrace and showing up with a $40 gift beween FH & I.
Is the covering your plate & then some just a NY wedding mentality??
IrishAli
Posted:
Member since
Re: Spin Off to wedding cost...what about wedding gifts???
My FMIL thinks it is rude to give money as a gift....she is from Maryland, and her family is from New Orleans.
This is why we made a Honeymoon registry! If they feel the need to give a 'gift', I hope they do that. While I am from NY and FH is from Maryland, we both give checks. His friends also give checks, so while it is a regional thing I think it is also a generation thing. I am nervous, though...my Shower invites have gone out and my friends have started buying registry gifts...but FH's family hasn't done anything, so I am wondering what they think the Shower is for?!
Im getting Married
Posted:
Member since
Re: Spin Off to wedding cost...what about wedding gifts???
FH & I had this convo before we booked anything. We decided we wanted our closest friends and family there even if they came with no gift (I would hope at least a card of congratulations)
This way if people did give nothing we are not disappointed. We want people to come celebrate our marriage and nothing more.
On the other hand I always try to cover my plate + some. I also except a few co workers might bring gifts. I'm just hoping they send them to my house because I'm more concerned with how to get them home at the end of the night.
sbarclay2
Posted:
Member since
Re: Spin Off to wedding cost...what about wedding gifts???
this is my biggest fear with FH family.. they are from upstate in the middle of nowhere and the average wedding in these surrounding towns cost like $2000. and they are like big pig roasts outside in the back yards with tents and picnic benches and kegs. lol
but thats why im afraid of ppl coming in jeans and for his family to be giving presents at the wedding. i mean i dont care what i get from ppl and know not to expect a lot which isnt what im looking for.. i just want ppl to show and have a good time but i just hate to see ppl coming in with big wrapped gifts.lol
JTG4EVER
Posted:
Member since
Re: Spin Off to wedding cost...what about wedding gifts???
The difference is...covering your plate may only be $30-$40 in other states. Weddings in other states cost a lot less so the gifts are less. Also, some states do have registry's for the wedding. They have a gift table! NY is very different than every where else. $250 would be a HUGE gift in other areas. I went to a wedding in Virginia and they had about 200 people there and made $2000 and got a bunch of gifts. When I told her people here make like $20,000 she almost fainted. Its crazy here! But I love it because its finally my turn!
JTG4EVER
Posted:
Member since
Re: Spin Off to wedding cost...what about wedding gifts???
Posted by PhyllisNJoe
I thought everyone covered their plate ++ but it doesn't seem to the the case everywhere.
Funny, but I hear people who have less usually give more then the people who have.
Not everyone! My FSIL got married in 2008 and she had 4 people come to her wedding and give NO gift and 1 couple gave $50!
JTG4EVER
Posted:
Member since
Re: Spin Off to wedding cost...what about wedding gifts???
Posted by Jennielee15
Giving money at weddings is a NY thing. For instance I told my mom (in Alaska) that my MOH was making my card box and she had no idea what that was. I'll be getting a ton of boxed gifts at the wedding!
I told my out of state people that there will be no gift table..only a card box haha
JTG4EVER
Posted:
Member since
Re: Spin Off to wedding cost...what about wedding gifts???
Posted by Kuklitsa143
Posted by Notwedyet08
I'm just wondering...do you find people here in NY (especially those familar with Long Island weddings) give bigger gifts than those in other areas??
I would say a gift is a gift; no matter where you live. BUT is that because i live in NY and know what typical weddings in this area cost? B/c that doesn't seem to be the case (at least not what i'm finding). I would give a gift of $200-$250+ up for a wedding. But my friend was telling me how she went a wedding in Baltimore Big 200+ person wedding. And the wedding gift she got them was a $40 vacuum off their registry b/c she said that was the least expensive biggest gift she could find.
Isn't the registry typically for the shower; and then for people that maybe couldn't 'make the wedding? I could never imagine going to a wedding at say Jericho Terrace and showing up with a $40 gift beween FH & I.
Is the covering your plate & then some just a NY wedding mentality??
My friend lives in NY and got married at JT. She was telling me some gifts that she got $25 GC to itunes??????? REALLY????? or a group of 4 friends all gave her $60 dollars? Her own BM didnt even give gifts? NUTSSS
My friends BM/cousin didn't give a gift! And her parents weren't there and didn't give a gift!
madamsireeda213
Posted:
Member since
Re: Spin Off to wedding cost...what about wedding gifts???
really i think its the just cost of living in NYC/LI. You can find a one bedroom huge apartment in Dallas, Texas for $800 dollars. Thats unheard of in NY. Its the same with weddings. I think I read somewhere that the average cost of a wedding is $20,000. that includes everything, the dress, the flowers, everything. I'm trying my hardest to get to that number but I am way over. So knowing the cost of a wedding in NYC/LI plus knowing that nowadays most couples are paying for the wedding by themselves with only some help from their family, it only seems appropriate to give a monetary gift. No bride should expect a guest to 'pay for their plate' (trust me, i know a bride who actually was mad when guest didnt pay for their plate and actually complained. I was so mad at her!!!! so rude) but giving some form of money would be nice. I wouldnt say no to a nice gift either. whatever people want to give me is fine!
