Spinoff: Thank Yous you wish you could write

I can't believe I forgot this one.

Dear SIL,

Thank you so much for stealing a lot of $$ worth of make up from my cousin who was the MOH. That didn't cause me too much drama the day of my wedding. Also, thank you for not shutting up for one second and being *** when we were looking for you for pics at church. I'm so glad I missed most of my CH partly because I was waiting for you. And how could I forget, thank you for leaving the RH an hour and a half early to have $ex with your brother's friend who was a groomsman. That was so classy. I hope that I can be the godmother to your love child.

Love,
Me

PS-Do NOT call me your sister, EVER! and you are no longer welcome in my home.

---

Posted by ChiefMT

Dear Celebrant,

Thank you so much for letting my groom and I run the rehearsal while you were examining the marriage license that you thought might be filled out incorrectly.

Most of all, I would like to thank you for making our mass so uniquely special. Your homily was truly touching as it sounded like a string of appropriate words that together made no sense at all. Thank for comletely skipping over the prayer of the faithful and getting right down to blessing the wine which wasn't yet in the glass because you skipped the presenting of the gifts as well. It was so nice that my groom could be a part of the mass while telling you that you forgot to get the gifts. Thank you for instructing the audience to kneel while they were already kneeling by saying, 'And then J.C. said to his Apostles: 'kneel.' You then proceeded to offer the sign of peace while everyone was still kneeling. The second Our Father was a favorite part of the entire ceremony and everyone is still talking about it. I would like to personally thank you for not spilling the red wine all over my white dress as your hand was shaking uncontrollably and for then standing on my veil the entire time you gave communion.

Thank you for being a part of our special day!

Sincerely,
The New Mrs.

---