Why is it an issue to post about the size of a diamond, but it's commonly accepted that we:
1. Chat about price per head 2. Chat about price of photo 3. Chat about price of music 4. Chat about price of flowers 5. Chat about price of limos
We're proud to talk about the 'good deal' we got on our price per head, but the size of my stone...OH DON'T GO THERE
ssdbk
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Re: Spinoff to 'how big is it'
I'm not quite sure that the ring discussion is really a more touchy subject than the 'price per head' thing. I don't really discuss either one of them very often. However, I did recently comment that when someone asks diamond size, the people who have larger sizes are sometimes more willing to answer. I say that b/c from the answers, you would think that lots of people have about 2 carats, and the truth is that there are some, but it's not the majority. And I don't assume that just because someone has a big stone, it's flawed but I hate when people see an average (or small) stone and assume it was cheap!!!
JazzyT
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Re: Spinoff to 'how big is it'
Posted by ginaandtommy06
Female equivalent of 'penis size'.
JazzyT
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Re: Spinoff to 'how big is it'
I really dont see the big deal in talking about ring size...we get pretty personal on here anyway
Mikeysgirl
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Re: Spinoff to 'how big is it'
Wow I started some trouble with my poll!! I haven't gone back to read all the responses but I'll do that now. Sorry ladies, I didn't know it was going to get so personal. Ring size doesn't matter I just thought it was interesting to know that in some states .18 cts is average while in other states the average size is considerably larger.
Maybride519
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Re: Spinoff to 'how big is it'
Posted by JazzyT
I really dont see the big deal in talking about ring size...we get pretty personal on here anyway
yeah..I thought so too. I never thought it would get to be this big.
MrsWmson2be
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Re: Spinoff to 'how big is it'
Posted by Reesa
Posted by suven
Posted by BklynItaliana
Posted by suven
I am wondering:
Why is it an issue to post about the size of a diamond, but it's commonly accepted that we:
1. Chat about price per head 2. Chat about price of photo 3. Chat about price of music 4. Chat about price of flowers 5. Chat about price of limos
We're proud to talk about the 'good deal' we got on our price per head, but the size of my stone...OH DON'T GO THERE
because it's more of a personal question, it's a question like how much money do you make, no one really likes to answer that but when put in a corner you tend to give in.
Some questions you just don't ask, they are rude.
You lost me on how it's any different from 'what are you paying per head.'
They are all inappropriate questions, but somehow the rest are okay to chat about, but NOT the diamond...
My point on the previous thread exactly!!!!
I think this is the difference: When a discussion arises concerning how much a bride and groom are paying 'per head,' it's less likely to arouse any personal feelings because it's really more of a wedding 'business decision' decided by bride and groom based upon a wide variety of factors like budget, size of the wedding, convenient location, shuttlebus (if necessary) whether or not kosher meals are served (if applicable). The bride and groom usually pick what's best suited for their needs and have a rationale for doing so.
HOWEVER, with an engagement ring, it's different. For one, the groom typically picks this out alone, and for the old-fashioned or traditional at heart, the proposal is very much a surprise. Two, picking an engagement ring isn't always a rational decision. While it's important for a groom to make sure he does his homework and doesn't overpay, one ring might just catch his eye and like another poster mentioned, he might say 'wow, this is just right for her.' In a situation like that (and yes, it happens a lot!!) there's little, if any, rationale in making such a heartfelt decision When that bride looks at her ring, she's reminded of one of the most important and sentimental moments in her life, i.e. the day/night her FH/hubby proposed to her. The ring becomes not just a piece of jewelry, but an emotional symbol of a fond memory. When others seek to ask it's size, clarity, color, or cut, it's reduced to a grade and the sentiment of the moment (i.e. what it represents) is cheapened.
Not that all, or even most, women will be take such a sensitive or personal stance, but a price per head and the specs of a woman's engagement ring are fully distinguishable on that basis.
suven
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Re: Spinoff to 'how big is it'
Posted by Mikeysgirl
Wow I started some trouble with my poll!! I haven't gone back to read all the responses but I'll do that now. Sorry ladies, I didn't know it was going to get so personal. Ring size doesn't matter I just thought it was interesting to know that in some states .18 cts is average while in other states the average size is considerably larger.
I don't think you started any trouble at all. I just can't understand why it's okay to ask 'how much per head' and I've even seen polls 'how much do you make', but once the bling comes into question it gets all tense around here...
Vicky423
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Re: Spinoff to 'how big is it'
Ok, wow I seriously don't get it. Its a ring with a stone, no matter the size its symbol. I asked FH to get me something small, (1/2 carat) and he did. I wanted small, but even if I hadn't and he would have gotten me smaller I would have been fine with it. It really not about the ring, and I don't mean to offend anyone by this, but in life someone will always have something you think is better, bigger or nicer. People that are happy are those who are content with what they have, and admire/ and are happy for others and what they have. My mom does not have a E-ring (my parents eloped) and she and my dad have been married for almost 29 yrs now. So those of you how have got big rocks, and those of you who were maybe a bit disappointed,remember someone took the time out (and $$$) to buy you something they thought you would like, and wear with pride. And I don't know about anybody else but the fact that my FH went to a store and took the time to talk to a salesperson, get my ring sized and so on means a lot. So come one ladies we are better than this. (Don't we make fun of men for comparing the sizes of their assets?)
samnjenna
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Re: Spinoff to 'how big is it'
When others seek to ask it's size, clarity, color or cut, it's reduced to a grade and the sentiment of the moment (ie what it represents) is cheapened.
I agree!!!
And maybe this is a little off topic -- but my ring is an antique and its size was not even a consideration when my DH chose it as my ring. Because of that I didn't feel like I could comment, but the fact is once its your engagement ring you really shouldn't think of it as a size or a price. Its your family heirloom and its meaning has everything to do with the love behind it. The 4 Cs only matter if you want to sell it!!!
mbm750
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Re: Spinoff to 'how big is it'
I don't think this topic is really different - for a lot of couples, the engagement ring was a business decision too. Some guys go completely on their own, but if you read the posts, a lot of couples decided at least some aspect of the ring together so for them and others, this too was a business decision, at least in part. My FH picked out my ring on his own, but we most certainly talked about it and I really wanted him to be reasonable because we want to have a house, and a nice wedding, and children, and all these things cost money too - maybe he saved for it on his own, but we're entering a marriage - there's no line drawing between my money and his and I didn't want him putting all his savings (which really is ours) towards my ring. Just didn't make sense to me. Plus there are numerous topics about off wedding planning things - jobs - what we do, what our FH's do for a living - and other topics - houses, cars, etc. - and those don't get so heated. So, I really just don't get it. To me this is no different than those other things, or than price per head and what other things cost and I may express my feelings about these things and hope other people do too - both when they're in agreement and when they're offended. We all can say what we want - that's part of what makes LIW so great. Does it bother me when people imply a larger diamond is lower quality - for a split second, sure, but that's their hang up, not mine. And I would never assume anything by the size of anyone's ring. Rings do not just reflect $ - they may reflect personality, style, values, etc. and they all symbolize great love - irrespective of size. There's a reason there's that expression about assumptions...
bridy06
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Re: Spinoff to 'how big is it'
My 2 cents - if you don't like a topic - don't respond to it. If something offends you - stop reading it
It's a public forum, if someone wants to post a question and people want to answer it - let them. Don't get involved and certainly don't tell someone else what is appropriate or inappropriate to say, ask, share etc.
We are all adults here and should respect every one's opinion - whether you like it or not - whether you agree with it or not - whether it is your business or not.
babybug631
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Re: Spinoff to 'how big is it'
Posted by bridy06
My 2 cents - if you don't like a topic - don't respond to it. If something offends you - stop reading it
It's a public forum, if someone wants to post a question and people want to answer it - let them. Don't get involved and certainly don't tell someone else what is appropriate or inappropriate to say, ask, share etc.
We are all adults here and should respect every one's opinion - whether you like it or not - whether you agree with it or not - whether it is your business or not.
Well said!
Joyous1995
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Re: Spinoff to 'how big is it'
what some people don't realize is that a good quality stone that is 1K can be significantly more money that a larger stone. I am saying this for all of the girls out there that wanted a bigger ring/
R&J0806
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Re: Spinoff to 'how big is it'
female equiv of penis size....i LOVE IT. :
JohnnysGirl350
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Re: Spinoff to 'how big is it'
Interesting for me to read this. My ring is on my finger for 2 weeks today and I feel like I shouldn't tell anyone about the size, specs, etc. I'm so proud of it and I would love to brag to the world about how much work and effort my FH put into picking it out for me but then I worry that it will sound like I'm just bragging... Guess that will be one of many dilemma's to come...
SillyBeans
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Re: Spinoff to 'how big is it'
Posted by Sunrise813
Posted by hmm8191
Posted by Bridex100
Some people are just too sensitive.
and insecure about what they have!
I agree I think some women are insecure about the size of their ring and jealous at the size of others rings, so they try to make other women feel bad.
I think that if the size if someone elses ring offends you than you need to look into yourselfs not project your insecurity onto others.
I agree w/ this totally. If a person doesn't like where the thread is going, then don't post and move on!
VadersBride2006
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Re: Spinoff to 'how big is it'
Posted by Bridex100
Some people are just too sensitive.
Or, they just want to start trouble!
Mrs. dleeny
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Re: Spinoff to 'how big is it'
Posted by FallBride05
Same here, in fact, my ring is a couple points lower than what I wanted, but DH said the quality of the 'bigger' ring was not as good and didn't look as good in the setting. He actually apologized to me for not gettng exactly what I wanted! I wouldn't change a thing about my ring!
same here... he had a choice of a few stones but he said they paled in comparison to the one he got me. so I didn't get the size I wanted, but the one I got is very high quality - a lot more than I ever dared to ask for. and I LOVE IT!
it's been over a year since I got it and I still catch myself (and others) memorized by the BLING!