Swingers

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Posted by kittythestray

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Posted by cjb88

Do you guys think Cheating is forgivable?

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Yes, but it would depend on the circumstances and they would get ONE and ONLY one more chance. One of my exes and I went through this and we actually had a stronger more trusting relationship AFTER. He's my ex now for other reasons, but I think until you've gone though it you can't say yes or no - people are quick to say 'NO WAY, I'd leave him' but once you're in the situation it's different.

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I think I may be able to forgive, but I couldn't really forget it or move on - I mean, before DH and I dated, he dated a casual acquaintance of mine, and I still think about it whenever we run into her, or knowing they went to certain places together - I couldnt imagine that happening when we are still together - I just could never continue with the relationship!

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Posted by FrogGirl0917
And they showed a swinger party -

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i read an article in a british magazine a few months ago about a swinger party. you would be surprised, it goes on more than you think. this one article was about a particular party that takes place in the cotswald section of england and it costs something like 100,000 a couple (i forget the exact amount, but it was some REALLY high amount). it is so much b/c they want a certain type of couple there. it happens once a year and people come from all over the world- they had a couple that flew in from new zealand. each party has a theme and this one was an eyes wide shut theme or something like that. i am sure there must be tons of underground swinger parties in NYC.

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Posted by N.Y.bride

I saw that. IMO its disgusting - but thats just me. Why do people remain married if you want to sleep with other people?

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I agree---I couldn't believe what I was hearing--I caught the end of it. So wrong.

i had missed it yesterday afternoon but stayed up to watch it at 1am... personally, i think it's just weird. i used to work with someone and her and her husband were swingers. i didn't get it then and i don't get it now. i guess if you both agree to it, then i don't think it's cheating persay. but how they were talking about the 'traditional' idea of marriage is changing... i dunno, vows are vows and they are supposed to mean something. and i personally think that if you want an open relationship then marriage shouldn't be an option for you. but i guess, to each their own and who am i to judge, right?
and no, i don't think cheating is forgiveable. well... maybe i could forgive someday down the road but i doubt i'd ever forget it. and i can't imagine remaining in a relationship where it would always be in the back of my mind, i'd always be resentful for it and the trust would just be diminished. i guess everyone's different. when i was younger, my dad had an affair with my best friend's mother for years. i didn't find out until a few years agao, but apparantly my mother found out and they worked through it somehow. my parents have now been married for close to 41 years and i'm so grateful that they worked through it. i just don't think i'd have it in me...

I had seen a movie (or a documentary?) about a swingers party where the willing participants would put their car keys in a bowl. Then each woman would pick a certain set of keys and whoever owned that set would go home with them. Wacky.

I know someone who went to a swingers club in NYC. He had been a bit wild all his life and his GF was up for it. His friend was a 'member' and was allowed to bring them along as his guests. You check your clothes at the door and walk around this building where there are rooms with beds or chairs or whatever. And you go in and do your thing, and other people watch you or join in if you're into that.

I guess I shouldn't have been surprised, I'm sure you can find anything in NYC. But he said it's an upscale area with upscale people and it's very controlled. Not just anyone could walk in there. Isn't that wild though?