So, I am really worried about my fiance's bachelor party. I COMPLETELY trust my fiance but I don't trust his friends or his brothers.
I'm so worried that they will pour alcohol down his throat to the point where he has no idea what is going on. I've heard them talk about going away for the weekend and having strippers!
I'm also scared since one of my fiance's other friends got married in November 2003 and for his bachelor party, some of the very same guys tried to get my fiance's friend to sleep with the stripper!
I've talked to my sweetie about what I think is inappropriate (strippers touching him, him touching strippers) and he assures me that he's never been into that and doesn't want that at his party.
But that still doesn't stop the icky feeling in the pit of my belly!
How are all of you dealing with this?
JessicaM.
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Re: The Bachelor Party
In November, my FH had his 'Dirty' 30. Part of the 'dirty' was the stripper entertainment. it was a co-ed party and she did a number of FH, but she never touched him anywhere 'personal'- most of the dancing actual happens in FRONT of the guy. It was NOT pleasant to WATCH, but I have no doubt that had I been there or not, NOTHING else would have happened.
I'm sure you will find that most strippers are professional women, not women of the oldest professional. Your guys friends undoubtedly just trying to be macho idiots- that is something they probably wouldn't do themselves.
Just concentrate on YOUR BACHELORETTE PARTY- there are strippers involved there too!
mushsgrl
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Member since
Re: The Bachelor Party
I told FH that I dont care about the strip clubs, it's the private strippers in hotel rooms that I dont like. So I also told his bestman (one of my bm fiances) how I feel and the guys tried to reasure me by telling me they are going to Atlantic City (OK) and going to find a 'working girl'. I was so upset, I can only hope they are joking. We planned ours for the same night so I would not be sitting home and wondering what they were doing.
cantwait2bewed
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Re: The Bachelor Party
My fiance is not into strippers but if he wanted to have them I wouldnt mind. I dont want them grinding on him or anything though. That is disgusting. I think we have having a joint bachelor and bachelorette party at a club or something. some people on both sides of our wedding party are not into strippers and stuff. So we will do something together.
GsCM4EVA
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Re: The Bachelor Party
I have been reading these posts and here is my opinion: I am getting married in a year and a half and I'm already worrying about this. But here is my opinion: I think bachelor parties that include strippers are stupid. You can go out and have a good time with out some whores puttin their breasts in your fiances faces or grinding on them. I do not like the idea of this-I'm hoping this will not happen LOL. I totally trust my fiancee, that doesnt even cross my mind that he would do something w/them, but I don't think its fair. So I totally agree.
D&C
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Re: The Bachelor Party
I think a lot of men (and women) use this time as an excuse to do stupid a** stuff that they would normally never do. I think the entire thing is BS. I do not think it is a right of passage , and I think that is a cop-out as well.
nferrandi
Posted:
Member since
Re: The Bachelor Party
I have mixed feelings about the whole b-party thing. For those who have complete utter faith that their FH would never do anything wrong, that's great, but in all fairness, it's kind of naive. I'm not saying your FH would do anything, but you can never say never. For those of you who may lose sleep over it, that's silly too. If your DH would ever do anything wrong, it could happen anywhere at anytime, not just at a b-party. I think it's fair to be concerned, but you just have to have faith. Worrying yourself sick won't do anything other than make yourself sick. Your FH is going to do what he's going to do no matter what, so there's no sense worrying yourself over what 'might' happen. Just my two cents. Oh, and for the record, my DH went to Vegas for 5 days for his b-party. Was I thrilled, not really. But I gave him a good sendoff (wink, wink) and told him to have a great time, which he did. Did he go to strip clubs, yes he did. Did he do anything to challenge my trust in him, I don't think so. Just let it be and it will be fine.
Kris77
Posted:
Member since
Re: The Bachelor Party
My 2 cents. If your FH is going to do something, he is going to do it no matter how much you worry about it from now until the Bach party. You can keep yourself awake at night worrying about this, but it REALLY DOES show your lack of trust for him. If this worries you, then you better think long and hard of how much you actually trust him. My FH went to a bachelor party 4 months ago, and I was out at Culture Club for the Bachelorette party, and I was like, 'So, how are the strippers', and his exact words were, 'Old, Beat Up looking, and I feel embarassed for them'. He was also piss drunk, and could care less about the naked girls. I on the other hand, was pissed he called me because I was enjoying a night out WITHOUT HIM. Moral of the story, they wonder what we are doing too. Thats the only reason he called me.
They dont care about stippers and all that BS as much as us ladies here think. As a matter of fact, I know most guy friends of mine are not even turned on by strippers, for the simple fact that MEN ACTUALLY LOOK DOWN ON THESE WOMEN. He is marrying you because he loves you and respects you, and if he wants to see some titties before the big day, let the guy have fun. And if you are going to have anxiety about this, its your problem, not his. Sorry to be so blunt, but thats just the way it goes.
lcherian
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Member since
Re: The Bachelor Party
Posted by Janice
Posted by CubanBride
Posted by Janice I mean stress over the wedding...I had such inlaw/BP/head count stress the last 2 weeks before my wedding, that DH going out on a free for all was the last thing I needed. I think when a bride has problems and stress caused by strippers that is a normal emotion. It surprises me the number of brides who are carefree with the stripper situation, I think something bigger is going on in their heads
You think that brides who have no problem with strippers are what...lying to ourselves or something?
I was in a BP once, and the bride arranged for the stripper to surprise her FH in the hotel room where the party we taking place..sorry I think that nudity and grinding came to an end when you put the ring on my finger
i agree. FH and I will not be having strippers at our bachelor(ette) parties...there's just no point in it. I dont need to see greasy men gyrating their dingalings in my face to have a good time, nor does FH need to have some skank smash his face in her tits. There are plenty of other ways to celebrate your last days as a unmarried person. It has nothing to do w/trust.
Soon2BMrsA
Posted:
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Re: The Bachelor Party
Posted by lcherian
Posted by Janice
Posted by CubanBride
Posted by Janice I mean stress over the wedding...I had such inlaw/BP/head count stress the last 2 weeks before my wedding, that DH going out on a free for all was the last thing I needed. I think when a bride has problems and stress caused by strippers that is a normal emotion. It surprises me the number of brides who are carefree with the stripper situation, I think something bigger is going on in their heads
You think that brides who have no problem with strippers are what...lying to ourselves or something?
I was in a BP once, and the bride arranged for the stripper to surprise her FH in the hotel room where the party we taking place..sorry I think that nudity and grinding came to an end when you put the ring on my finger
i agree. FH and I will not be having strippers at our bachelor(ette) parties...there's just no point in it. I dont need to see greasy men gyrating their dingalings in my face to have a good time, nor does FH need to have some skank smash his face in her tits. There are plenty of other ways to celebrate your last days as a unmarried person. It has nothing to do w/trust.
Exactly!!!! Well said Leena!
marymoon
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Re: The Bachelor Party
Um....They can't 'pour alcoholdown his throat' the man has free will and hopefully a conscience..if you think they can somehow FORCE him to drink and do things he toherwise nromally wouldn;t do for the bach aprty, why couldn;t they do it after you're married? you're completely taking responsibilityaway from your FH here, and it is HIS responsibility. you're making excuses for him before he's even done anyting...unless they tie him up and hold his nose, they can't 'pour alcohol down his throat'...he's an adult, he should know his limits..if he doesn't, you'll have as much of a problem after you're married as you're anticipating at the bach party
troutster
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Re: The Bachelor Party
For my fh bachelor party I think his bm and gm are planning an atlantic city trip. I know his bm well and he will probably wnat strippers. I don't really want to know if thye have them or not, even though I don't really like them and FH isn't into that stuff. I trust him and I know that no matter what the guys do he will do what he wants.
Shorty McBride
Posted:
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Re: The Bachelor Party
My FH will not be having a b-party per se- we live on LI but we are getting married in Florida. He is so grossed out by strippers, doesn't drink too much, and would much rather be home watching a game than out at a bar/club.
He just wants to have 3 or 4 guys (his close friends) come over and play some poker, watch a game, etc.
However, one of his friends is getting married Nov 06, and is ALREADY planning his orgy of a bachelor party. FH wants nothing to do w/ this now, but I'm sure things will change as it gets closer. I would be INCREDIBLY upset if FH was titty- rubbed and humped by a stripper...enough to make me reconsider spending the rest of my life with him. I know that sounds sooo drastic, but strippers are just not 'him'. If he agreed to strippers, he'd be changing, and for the worse.
