The responsibility of parents

On the thread about why we have this board, Ron posted that a lot of FGs look on this site and the parents get upset that they are getting TMI on NWR. This brought up a pet peeve of mine.

I get very upset when parents don't take enough responsibility for their children's exposure to TV, internet, etc. I understand that parents cannot monitor every single thing their children do, but I know that when I was a child, if my parents thought a TV show was inappropriate, I was NOT allowed to watch it. If I did watch it, I would get in trouble - they wouldn't blame the network or the FCC. Obviously, when I was little, we didn't have the internet, but I feel like when I have kids I will be very aware of what they are looking at and monitor their usage. No, you can't prevent them from everything 'inappropriate', but at least you can take some responsibility.

I feel the same way about school. Teachers are so frequently blamed for lack of student performance when you don't have parents enforcing that their children do homework and sitting down and helping them with it. They don't have contact with the teachers and take their children at their word when they claim they 'I don't have any homework.' Granted, many parents are busy working or don't have the education themselves to help their children, but again - don't just blame the teachers and the schools. I feel that too many parents are trying to be friends with their kids these days and not an authority figure. I guess I'm going to be tough parent when the time comes.

Okay, that's my rant for today...thanks for listening...

Re: The responsibility of parents

All Ron has to do with this forum... is just require that the person be LOGGED-IN to the site to view it. Its real simple... keep the guests out.

Then if somebody lives in a household where they have little girls that like to get on the PC and on the site... all they have to do is just click the LOG OFF button when they leave the PC and they are set.

A fair solution IMO and I applaud LIW for this.

Re: The responsibility of parents

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Posted by DjPiLL

All Ron has to do with this forum... is just require that the person be LOGGED-IN to the site to view it. Its real simple... keep the guests out.

Then if somebody lives in a household where they have little girls that like to get on the PC and on the site... all they have to do is just click the LOG OFF button when they leave the PC and they are set.

A fair solution IMO and I applaud LIW for this.

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I think that's a great solution. I have no problem with LIW taking safeguards so kids don't read inappropriate things. It just set off my pet peeve, so I felt the need to vent.

Re: The responsibility of parents

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Posted by DjPiLL

All Ron has to do with this forum... is just require that the person be LOGGED-IN to the site to view it. Its real simple... keep the guests out.

Then if somebody lives in a household where they have little girls that like to get on the PC and on the site... all they have to do is just click the LOG OFF button when they leave the PC and they are set.

A fair solution IMO and I applaud LIW for this.

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Bingo!

Re: The responsibility of parents

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Posted by Jax430

I feel the same way about school. Teachers are so frequently blamed for lack of student performance when you don't have parents enforcing that their children do homework and sitting down and helping them with it. They don't have contact with the teachers and take their children at their word when they claim they 'I don't have any homework.' Granted, many parents are busy working or don't have the education themselves to help their children, but again - don't just blame the teachers and the schools. I feel that too many parents are trying to be friends with their kids these days and not an authority figure. I guess I'm going to be tough parent when the time comes.

Okay, that's my rant for today...thanks for listening...

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Jax....I somewhat diagree with this. Being that I've stepped into parenthood recently (my step-daughter) is now living with us full time and going to school. While she is responsible to bring home her books and get her homework done...which doesn't always happen. I find myself asking everyday to see the homework book (where they write down their homework). And there are many days when she writes things down, but the supporting books to go along with the assignments are not present. I don't think the teacher should have to make sure each student takes home the right books by checking their book-bag...I have written notes to the teacher asking that she make an effort to help her get this done. The child comes home from school...and when I ask where the books are, she doesn't have them. I can blame the child to a certain extent (she's in 3rd grade), but I do blame the teacher some also for not responding to my notes. So...who's to blame? I can't help with the homework if I don't have the tools to do so. i can't go to school at 3:15 everyday and pack up the kid's bookbag for her. So there's a lot of things to work on

Re: The responsibility of parents

RE: pet peeve

this is my pet peeve as well. but the parents don't think that a wedding site would have R rated material on it. i agree. so, we put in safeguards to keep everyone happy!

Re: The responsibility of parents

So there is a way to keep young adults off the off topic board? I don't get it.....

Re: The responsibility of parents

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Posted by luvsun27

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Posted by Jax430

I feel the same way about school. Teachers are so frequently blamed for lack of student performance when you don't have parents enforcing that their children do homework and sitting down and helping them with it. They don't have contact with the teachers and take their children at their word when they claim they 'I don't have any homework.' Granted, many parents are busy working or don't have the education themselves to help their children, but again - don't just blame the teachers and the schools. I feel that too many parents are trying to be friends with their kids these days and not an authority figure. I guess I'm going to be tough parent when the time comes.

Okay, that's my rant for today...thanks for listening...

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Jax....I somewhat diagree with this. Being that I've stepped into parenthood recently (my step-daughter) is now living with us full time and going to school. While she is responsible to bring home her books and get her homework done...which doesn't always happen. I find myself asking everyday to see the homework book (where they write down their homework). And there are many days when she writes things down, but the supporting books to go along with the assignments are not present. I don't think the teacher should have to make sure each student takes home the right books by checking their book-bag...I have written notes to the teacher asking that she make an effort to help her get this done. The child comes home from school...and when I ask where the books are, she doesn't have them. I can blame the child to a certain extent (she's in 3rd grade), but I do blame the teacher some also for not responding to my notes. So...who's to blame? I can't help with the homework if I don't have the tools to do so. i can't go to school at 3:15 everyday and pack up the kid's bookbag for her. So there's a lot of things to work on

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Luvsun - I couldn't agree with you more - being a mother of a first grader, I am having very similar problems with my sons teacher!!

Re: The responsibility of parents

I definitely understand what you're saying here. There is no good excuse for a teacher not responding to a parent's note. I definitely didn't mean to say that teachers shouldn't be blamed for anything and everything is the parent's repsonsibility..sorry if it came out that way.

As a child who was incredibly disorganized and frequently left her schoolbooks at school, my mom would drive me back to school to get the books I needed. I know this isn't always possible, though.

Re: The responsibility of parents

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Posted by LIWeddings NYCityWeddings

RE: pet peeve

this is my pet peeve as well. but the parents don't think that a wedding site would have R rated material on it. i agree. so, we put in safeguards to keep everyone happy!

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Keeping everyone happy is good As far as wedding sites not having sexual topics on it...well, weddings are naturally related to sex!

Re: The responsibility of parents

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Posted by Jax430

I definitely understand what you're saying here. There is no good excuse for a teacher not responding to a parent's note. I definitely didn't mean to say that teachers shouldn't be blamed for anything and everything is the parent's repsonsibility..sorry if it came out that way.

As a child who was incredibly disorganized and frequently left her schoolbooks at school, my mom would drive me back to school to get the books I needed. I know this isn't always possible, though.

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Jax....I totally understood your statement and I didn't think you were blaming anyone. But...I agree that the parents have a responsibility to the child's homework as much as the teacher.

Unfortunately...in today's world when both parents are working...by the time we get home from work and pick the child up from the after-school program (which by the way is run by the town and not the school...so it is at a different location than the school) it's too late to get into the school to get the proper books.

Re: The responsibility of parents

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Posted by luvsun27

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Posted by Jax430

I definitely understand what you're saying here. There is no good excuse for a teacher not responding to a parent's note. I definitely didn't mean to say that teachers shouldn't be blamed for anything and everything is the parent's repsonsibility..sorry if it came out that way.

As a child who was incredibly disorganized and frequently left her schoolbooks at school, my mom would drive me back to school to get the books I needed. I know this isn't always possible, though.

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Jax....I totally understood your statement and I didn't think you were blaming anyone. But...I agree that the parents have a responsibility to the child's homework as much as the teacher.

Unfortunately...in today's world when both parents are working...by the time we get home from work and pick the child up from the after-school program (which by the way is run by the town and not the school...so it is at a different location than the school) it's too late to get into the school to get the proper books.

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What happens when your stepdaughter can't get her homework done? Are there consequences at home or in class? Sometimes, having to accept the negative consequences helps kids learn to take more responsibility and be more careful about taking the correct books home. Doesn't work for all kids though, just the kids who care about doing well and not getting penalized.
(This is now the school psychologist in me talking )

Re: The responsibility of parents

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Posted by Kate

So there is a way to keep young adults off the off topic board? I don't get it.....

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Yes, you will need to be logged in to view the board. If you are not a logged in user then you won't see it. (fyi-programming not finished for this yet)

Re: The responsibility of parents

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Posted by LIWeddings NYCityWeddings

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Posted by Kate

So there is a way to keep young adults off the off topic board? I don't get it.....

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Yes, you will need to be logged in to view the board. If you are not a logged in user then you won't see it. (fyi-programming not finished for this yet)

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Now is this going to be a seperate log in then the one we already have?

Re: The responsibility of parents

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Posted by ChristineC68

Now is this going to be a seperate log in then the one we already have?

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No!

Re: The responsibility of parents

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Posted by LIWeddings NYCityWeddings

RE: pet peeve

this is my pet peeve as well. but the parents don't think that a wedding site would have R rated material on it. i agree. so, we put in safeguards to keep everyone happy!

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UMMM...Ron (and others)...what happens after someone gets married? I think that it's only normal that there WOULD be 's e x' talk on a wedding site. Now, we certainly don't need to be embelished with XXX types of things that go one, but I do think that the 'R rated' stuff is normal for a wedding website...

Re: The responsibility of parents

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Posted by suven


UMMM...Ron (and others)...what happens after someone gets married? I think that it's only normal that there WOULD be 's e x' talk on a wedding site. Now, we certainly don't need to be embelished with XXX types of things that go one, but I do think that the 'R rated' stuff is normal for a wedding website...

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yes, so now there is a board that we ask everyone to keep these topics on so the outside world can't see them. that's all!

Re: The responsibility of parents

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Posted by Jax430


What happens when your stepdaughter can't get her homework done? Are there consequences at home or in class? Sometimes, having to accept the negative consequences helps kids learn to take more responsibility and be more careful about taking the correct books home. Doesn't work for all kids though, just the kids who care about doing well and not getting penalized.
(This is now the school psychologist in me talking )

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When the books aren't brought home....we usually have a discussion over dinner about responsibilities and bring your stuff home. TV and computer are the first things taken away....we have to earn them back. Unfortunately....this is a cycle. She is only a kid...and being that she came from a not so nice place living with her mother...I feel that even though she is in the 3rd grade...we are starting with a 1st grader's perspective on how to get our schoolwork done. It's a work in progress....

Re: The responsibility of parents

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Posted by luvsun27

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Posted by Jax430


What happens when your stepdaughter can't get her homework done? Are there consequences at home or in class? Sometimes, having to accept the negative consequences helps kids learn to take more responsibility and be more careful about taking the correct books home. Doesn't work for all kids though, just the kids who care about doing well and not getting penalized.
(This is now the school psychologist in me talking )

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When the books aren't brought home....we usually have a discussion over dinner about responsibilities and bring your stuff home. TV and computer are the first things taken away....we have to earn them back. Unfortunately....this is a cycle. She is only a kid...and being that she came from a not so nice place living with her mother...I feel that even though she is in the 3rd grade...we are starting with a 1st grader's perspective on how to get our schoolwork done. It's a work in progress....

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I have no doubt that you're doing a great job with her. It's really hard to teach kids to take responsibility for this stuff. I was terrible at it as a kid...I was the typical, 'you'd forget your head if it wasn't attached' kind of kid, and now I'm in a doctoral program...still not totally organized, but I somehow give off the appearance that I am!