Its really been irking me that my step-father says, 'This is our wedding too' because they paid for the reception hall. I think its a little selfish of him and my mom to feel this way just because they had their wedding. They make it seem like they should get first dibs as to who is invited. Anytime I mention a cousin from my real fathers side who should be invited they get angry and say, 'You havent spoken to them in years' Meanwhile, Im inviting every cousin on my PR side (about 20 of them) and some of them I speak to once a year. Why is it fair to not include my fathers side when theyre my blood. I know my dad is not contributing to the wedding (he's broke) but it doesnt mean his side of my family shouldnt be invited. This whole guestlist thing is gonna cause a huge fight between all of us. My step-father even wants a say in the menu. Which I dont mind if he chooses some plates but I mainly want italian food. Im dreading this.
ILoveHim
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Re: This is our wedding too... (Parent Vent)
I'm having a similar problem
lyndanoelle
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Re: This is our wedding too... (Parent Vent)
Im so sorry you have to deal with that kind of crap.
Its really nice for them to help pay, but this is your and your fh's wedding.
I hope things work out or come to a somewhat satisfying compromise
Butterfly123
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Re: This is our wedding too... (Parent Vent)
I know. I was excited that the invitations came but now Im dreading putting them together. They are being so greedy and they never forget to remind me that they paid for the RH. I think its so selfish of them to call this their wedding too. It infuriates me.
empressdani
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Re: This is our wedding too... (Parent Vent)
I know exactly how you're feeling. Weddings for some reason make people think that they need to voice their opinion on everything. It makes it extra difficult when people are contributing. Have you had a discussion with them about how this makes you feel? I'm sure this can be worked out
Butterfly123
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Re: This is our wedding too... (Parent Vent)
Posted by empressdani
I know exactly how you're feeling. Weddings for some reason make people think that they need to voice their opinion on everything. It makes it extra difficult when people are contributing. Have you had a discussion with them about how this makes you feel? I'm sure this can be worked out
Ive tried but they dont listen. Its in one ear and out the other. If he mentions it being their wedding too again, I think Im gonna say something. Were all supposed to get together Sunday to start working on the invites. So we'll see what happens.
Celest
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Re: This is our wedding too... (Parent Vent)
Posted by Songstress1212
Ive tried but they dont listen. Its in one ear and out the other. If he mentions it being their wedding too again, I think Im gonna say something. Were all supposed to get together Sunday to start working on the invites. So we'll see what happens.
Ask him if he is planning on spending the honeymoon night with your fiance. If not then NO, it is not your wedding too. He is not marrying your fiance, You are remind them of that. Can you talk to your mom aside?
Butterfly123
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Re: This is our wedding too... (Parent Vent)
Posted by Celest76
Posted by Songstress1212
Ive tried but they dont listen. Its in one ear and out the other. If he mentions it being their wedding too again, I think Im gonna say something. Were all supposed to get together Sunday to start working on the invites. So we'll see what happens.
Ask him if he is planning on spending the honeymoon night with your fiance. If not then NO, it is not your wedding too. He is not marrying your fiance, You are remind them of that. Can you talk to your mom aside?
OMG You just made me laugh when I didnt think I could laugh. I SHOULD say that! I just might if he says that again. I dont wanna cause drama for my mama so Im just gonna keep shut and hope that working on the guestlist doesnt cause a war. Im so stressed out. In one more hour, my wedding will be exactly 3 months away and Im more stressed than excited. Im feeling so overwhelmed tonight.
OLA
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Re: This is our wedding too... (Parent Vent)
my sister is helping me plan and she swears its her wedding i hate it and i told her but she keeps doin it, its like WAIT FOR YOUR OWN WEDDING
Butterfly123
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Re: This is our wedding too... (Parent Vent)
Posted by OLA
my sister is helping me plan and she swears its her wedding i hate it and i told her but she keeps doin it, its like WAIT FOR YOUR OWN WEDDING
Yeah, I mean I appreciate their monetary help but its not their wedding. Theyve had two of their own weddings for Gods sakes! Can I live??!!
TheFutureMrsM
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Re: This is our wedding too... (Parent Vent)
My Dad, and FH's Parents are contributing to the wedding. I let them decide who they wanted to invite on the guest list, Since they are contributing. No one is paying for the whole Reception. Just giving us money, we havnt even taken it yet, cause we really dont need it.
IF...both sides werent giving us anything, i would of been WAYYYYYYYYYY more strict on the guest list.
Celest
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Re: This is our wedding too... (Parent Vent)
Posted by Songstress1212
OMG You just made me laugh when I didnt think I could laugh. I SHOULD say that! I just might if he says that again. I dont wanna cause drama for my mama so Im just gonna keep shut and hope that working on the guestlist doesnt cause a war. Im so stressed out. In one more hour, my wedding will be exactly 3 months away and Im more stressed than excited. Im feeling so overwhelmed tonight.
aww hon happy to help. Don't worry this will all pass, you will have a wonderful time at the wedding & you have your adorable kitty to help. Hey why don't you send your attack kitty to handle it. On look with this face & everyone will be put on alert
Butterfly123
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Re: This is our wedding too... (Parent Vent)
Posted by TheFutureMrsM
My Dad, and FH's Parents are contributing to the wedding. I let them decide who they wanted to invite on the guest list, Since they are contributing. No one is paying for the whole Reception. Just giving us money, we havnt even taken it yet, cause we really dont need it.
IF...both sides werent giving us anything, i would of been WAYYYYYYYYYY more strict on the guest list.
Im not telling them who to invite. I would never tell them they couldnt invite everyone when theyre the ones paying for the RH. Its just when they put their two cents in about who I can invite. My mom always has something to say about anyone I invite who isnt family. And just cause theyre contributing doesnt give them the right to call it their wedding. I think thats a little extreme.
Butterfly123
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Re: This is our wedding too... (Parent Vent)
Posted by Celest76
Posted by Songstress1212
OMG You just made me laugh when I didnt think I could laugh. I SHOULD say that! I just might if he says that again. I dont wanna cause drama for my mama so Im just gonna keep shut and hope that working on the guestlist doesnt cause a war. Im so stressed out. In one more hour, my wedding will be exactly 3 months away and Im more stressed than excited. Im feeling so overwhelmed tonight.
aww hon happy to help. Don't worry this will all pass, you will have a wonderful time at the wedding & you have your adorable kitty to help. Hey why don't you send your attack kitty to handle it. On look with this face & everyone will be put on alert
I should definitely sic my attack kitty on everyone!!!
Thanks for that, seriously!!!! Im dying right now!!! My little evil cat is sleeping on my lap right now. SHe's keeping me warm.
Celest
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Re: This is our wedding too... (Parent Vent)
Posted by Songstress1212
I should definitely sic my attack kitty on everyone!!!
Thanks for that, seriously!!!! Im dying right now!!! My little evil cat is sleeping on my lap right now. SHe's keeping me warm.
My work is done then!!! Super Meee
Butterfly123
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Re: This is our wedding too... (Parent Vent)
You really did cheer me up. Thanks!
Mrs. V 2008
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Re: This is our wedding too... (Parent Vent)
my parents are paying for mine as well, and i feel the same sometimes..they're inviting so many additional people..and the list grows bigger and bigger everyday!
Espo22
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Re: This is our wedding too... (Parent Vent)
so sorry
the day of your wedding none of this will be on your mind
Butterfly123
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Re: This is our wedding too... (Parent Vent)
Posted by Bride 2 Be
my parents are paying for mine as well, and i feel the same sometimes..they're inviting so many additional people..and the list grows bigger and bigger everyday!
Theyve actually been really good with who to invite. Although I mentioned to my mom today how she's excluding my three cousins from my fathers side. And she got upset that I wanted to invite them and then my stepfather says, 'Im not inviting this person and that person' and he goes on to name people who he hasnt spoken to in years who Ive only spoken to once in my life. They also say things like, 'Well FH is inviting so many friends' When they know my FH has hardly any family. I just feel like theyre being so insensitive. this wedding is happening because of them and FH & I. Not just them. You know? Okay sorry I started again....
Am I wrong though? Should they get first dibs on the guestlist cause they paid for it?
Mrs. V 2008
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Re: This is our wedding too... (Parent Vent)
Posted by Songstress1212
Posted by Bride 2 Be
my parents are paying for mine as well, and i feel the same sometimes..they're inviting so many additional people..and the list grows bigger and bigger everyday!
Theyve actually been really good with who to invite. Although I mentioned to my mom today how she's excluding my three cousins from my fathers side. And she got upset that I wanted to invite them and then my stepfather says, 'Im not inviting this person and that person' and he goes on to name people who he hasnt spoken to in years who Ive only spoken to once in my life. They also say things like, 'Well FH is inviting so many friends' When they know my FH has hardly any family. I just feel like theyre being so insensitive. this wedding is happening because of them and FH & I. Not just them. You know? Okay sorry I started again....
Am I wrong though? Should they get first dibs on the guestlist cause they paid for it?
Its your wedding and i think its ultimately YOUR decision with whom you want to invite..so to answer your question...NO YOUR NOT WRONG! My mom didn't want to invite her own cousins (as she hasn't seen them to often) but i thought that was so rude considering she was inviting all these friends before her family!!!!!
