This'll probably stir up drama.....

And who am I to say anything, as I don't post that often (or maybe it's because I type too slow)......
But WHY do people spill their guts about every little problem/idiosyncracy/issue/fight they have with their FI on a public message board?!? And then get all pissy when people point that out? Don't these people reread their posts and realize how RIDICULOUS they look?

I love to come on here to get ideas, share good news, quell wedding jitters and get advice, - I really do feel a sense of community on here, but I would NEVER, EVER talk about the issues that FI and I may have (especially if we had fights over and over and over and over). I may FM people I feel close to, but to air the dirty laundry on a public board - NO WAY

Anyone else feel like about 'some' of the repeat offenders?

If this post offends people or if it causes drama, I will delete it - just let me know (FM)

I think people just feel comfortable venting to people that are not personally involved while others have been here for so long that they feel comfortable enough to vent to everyone, sonce many of the old timers feel that this is one big happy

i agree with Bri Bri we just feel like family and to talk and vent about whats going on in our lives helps us and this is a not wedding related post. yes some things are too personal to talk about and if some people dont want to write on the boards they dont have too but i say we talk about everything because we are comfortable with one another but i understand what you are saying!

Eta: Sorry i did not know what we were talking about somepeople i should say some things yes it should not be put on the boards because it will cause problems in the long run.

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Posted by LIBrideinBWI

And who am I to say anything, as I don't post that often (or maybe it's because I type too slow)......
But WHY do people spill their guts about every little problem/idiosyncracy/issue/fight they have with their FI on a public message board?!? And then get all pissy when people point that out? Don't these people reread their posts and realize how RIDICULOUS they look?

I love to come on here to get ideas, share good news, quell wedding jitters and get advice, - I really do feel a sense of community on here, but I would NEVER, EVER talk about the issues that FI and I may have (especially if we had fights over and over and over and over). I may FM people I feel close to, but to air the dirty laundry on a public board - NO WAY

Anyone else feel like about 'some' of the repeat offenders?

If this post offends people or if it causes drama, I will delete it - just let me know (FM)

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Couldn't have said it better myself. Some of the stories I have read on here are just insane.

i think some people feel comfortable talking about there problems because they feel there are speaking to friends. i dont see anything wrong with it and if thats not your style thats fine but you shouldnt fault anyone that does feel like they need to post about important personal issues to them. some people may need another point of view from people that have no stake in the issue and can be fair and impartial.


edited for spelling

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Posted by LIBrideinBWI

I guess my issue is the people that ALWAYS post about the numerous problems they have with their FI. Don't these people SEE the pattern?

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I think you may be referring to a specific situation? fm

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Posted by LIBrideinBWI

Anyone else feel like about 'some' of the repeat offenders?

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Well I for one agree with this point in particular.. I don't so much mind the vents, nor the fact that we all share our relationship issues with our FH/DH's amongst one another on the forums.. since often in sharing, we can commiserate and resolve those issues as well! And sometimes you just want to VENT and its easier amongst those who aren't personally involved in our lives

But yet I do feel that in some cases (and I think we're thinking of the same case)... there is a limit to what should be posted, ESPECIALLY when certain posters DO NOT TRULY WANT TO HEAR ANY 'ADVICE' per se!!

I do think we all enjoy the sense of 'community' here, especially amongst those of us who have become online 'friends' .. but I do feel that none of us should forget that this is a PUBLIC forum and that anyone could be reading what we post, and we should post with caution at times!!

My feelings are that you need to THINK before you post something very personal -- and be ready for any and all opinions (good bad or otherwise) Not to mention, you post personal stuff - then you better be prepared and able to deal with the consequences in doing so !!

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Posted by janwinterbridejoy

i think some people feel comfortable talking about there problems because they feel there are speaking to friends. i dont see anything wrong with it and if thats not your style thats fine but you shouldnt fault anyone that does feel like they need to post about important personal issues to them. some people may need another point of view from people that have no stake in the issue and can be fair and impartial.


edited for spelling

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Very well said

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Posted by FeliciaDA

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Posted by LIBrideinBWI

Anyone else feel like about 'some' of the repeat offenders?

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Well I for one agree with this point in particular.. I don't so much mind the vents, nor the fact that we all share our relationship issues with our FH/DH's amongst one another on the forums.. since often in sharing, we can commiserate and resolve those issues as well! And sometimes you just want to VENT and its easier amongst those who aren't personally involved in our lives

But yet I do feel that in some cases (and I think we're thinking of the same case)... there is a limit to what should be posted, ESPECIALLY when certain posters DO NOT TRULY WANT TO HEAR ANY 'ADVICE' per se!!

I do think we all enjoy the sense of 'community' here, especially amongst those of us who have become online 'friends' .. but I do feel that none of us should forget that this is a PUBLIC forum and that anyone could be reading what we post, and we should post with caution at times!!

My feelings are that you need to THINK before you post something very personal -- and be ready for any and all opinions (good bad or otherwise) Not to mention, you post personal stuff - then you better be prepared and able to deal with the consequences in doing so !!

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EXACTLY!!!!!

I know what you mean by this. Its like listening to a friend who tells you how horribly she is treated by a boyfriend/fiance/husband...you listen, offer advice, listen some more...etc till you can't take it and wonder why she won't leave the shmuck!!! lol..

can anyone tell i'm dealing with this in real life???

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Posted by FeliciaDA

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Posted by LIBrideinBWI

Anyone else feel like about 'some' of the repeat offenders?

---

Well I for one agree with this point in particular.. I don't so much mind the vents, nor the fact that we all share our relationship issues with our FH/DH's amongst one another on the forums.. since often in sharing, we can commiserate and resolve those issues as well! And sometimes you just want to VENT and its easier amongst those who aren't personally involved in our lives

But yet I do feel that in some cases (and I think we're thinking of the same case)... there is a limit to what should be posted, ESPECIALLY when certain posters DO NOT TRULY WANT TO HEAR ANY 'ADVICE' per se!!

I do think we all enjoy the sense of 'community' here, especially amongst those of us who have become online 'friends' .. but I do feel that none of us should forget that this is a PUBLIC forum and that anyone could be reading what we post, and we should post with caution at times!!

My feelings are that you need to THINK before you post something very personal -- and be ready for any and all opinions (good bad or otherwise) Not to mention, you post personal stuff - then you better be prepared and able to deal with the consequences in doing so !!

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EXTREMELY well said- now I know we are all thinking of the same specific event . . .

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Posted by LIBrideinBWI

I guess my issue is the people that ALWAYS post about the numerous problems they have with their FI. Don't these people SEE the pattern?

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yes i agree. some people should be talking to their fh instead of us....

I think it's just getting to me because I see these same patterns at work. I'm a flight attendant since we will usually fly with someone and then never see them again, people feel the same anonyminity- you wouldn't BELIEVE the things some women will take about to a perfect stranger. We call it 'jumpseat confessions.'

It just kills me to hear 'my FI is so abusive' and then 'We have a great relationship' in the next sentence.....

I'm just feeling beyotchy today, me thinks...

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Posted by FeliciaDA

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Posted by LIBrideinBWI

Anyone else feel like about 'some' of the repeat offenders?

---

Well I for one agree with this point in particular.. I don't so much mind the vents, nor the fact that we all share our relationship issues with our FH/DH's amongst one another on the forums.. since often in sharing, we can commiserate and resolve those issues as well! And sometimes you just want to VENT and its easier amongst those who aren't personally involved in our lives

But yet I do feel that in some cases (and I think we're thinking of the same case)... there is a limit to what should be posted, ESPECIALLY when certain posters DO NOT TRULY WANT TO HEAR ANY 'ADVICE' per se!!

I do think we all enjoy the sense of 'community' here, especially amongst those of us who have become online 'friends' .. but I do feel that none of us should forget that this is a PUBLIC forum and that anyone could be reading what we post, and we should post with caution at times!!

My feelings are that you need to THINK before you post something very personal -- and be ready for any and all opinions (good bad or otherwise) Not to mention, you post personal stuff - then you better be prepared and able to deal with the consequences in doing so !!

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Thank you! I couldn't agree more with this! Some people just don't want to face the truth and when it's said to them, they take offense.

Thankfully, I don't vent about major issues if any. Every now and then, I vent about InLaws and my frustration with TTC. But, for me it is a way for me to vent and let out my frustrations. If anything, I see women venting about the garbage, cleaning up....etc. But, I do agree that women with more serious issues should talk to their DH or FI.

Sometimes it's easier for people to vent about their issues to strangers than to friends or family. That's why there are psychologists. I guess LIW is cheaper.