tired of all the crap! (long)

Original post by nycchic_24

Mar 25, 2003 05:03 PM

I am not here during the day but the first thing I do when i get home is come to the boards to see what has happened. I see that a lot of the 'older' posters dont post as much anymore (Sonic, Marnles, etc.) and it makes me sad. I miss the old days, when people had a conflict of interest, they would talk about it privately..not slander everyone on the boards. I will be honest here, Sonic and I had a small disagreement one time and we handled it our way, like adult women, no name calling, putting down or anything else. I respect the heck out of her and everything she did to help people with their weddings and what she did to make her own a success. Although we had a disagreement, we came to terms with it, got over it and she answers my posts a lot which I so appreciate! This is what WOMEN do and how WOMEN behave.

I just cannot believe that in a time when the world is falling apart around us, we the lucky ones, come here and start this nonsense! Yes this is our escape, this is our own little world but its supposed to be filled with good things. Of course at times there will be disagreements but there is a way to handle them. Is this what we are really concerned with when our men and women are putting their lives on the line for our freedom?? People are getting killed each day doing a job that I am so happy someone chooses to do because I know I could never and we sit here bashing each other over the **** internet?!?!?! No sense to me!

If this is what you girls need to worry about in life, who called who what, who doesnt like who, who should be banned from liweddings, who should call the wedding police and so on...I am ashamed to be a part of this community! The world is in a state of chaos right now, do we actually need to bring more drama into a place where we should be coming to get away from it all????

I have made good friends on this site and a handful of them dont even post anymore due to all this crap! When we were planning our weddings and the like, we were here to help each other. I remember the days when the nwr board was for recipes and stories about our lives, when the bhb boards was actually brides helping brides...I am proud to be a newlywed but not proud to be a part of this crap! I am a 27 year old woman who has just gotten married and who loves to get to know women who are going through the same experiences as her. Period...nothing more nothing less.

I just cant believe that these are the things that are important to some of you. Those of you who have stated things like I have just said in other posts, I have the upmost respect for you. Good luck to all of you and I hope we can start realizing what life is truly about!

Leelee Posted: Mar 25, 2003 09:29 PM

Re: tired of all the crap! (long)

I wanted to add my own take on the situation at hand...I am in total agreement with Suzanne. I'm one of the girls she was referring to. I have been on this site since 7/01 and was totally ignored whenever I posted something...it wasn't a welcoming vibe. But now-I love the boards so much. I love meeting new women and chatting with them...it's a wonderful community! Without all the new girls--we wouldn't have this amazing site! However, I agree that the madness should end. There's no need for it...

Karen H Posted: Mar 25, 2003 10:06 PM

Re: tired of all the crap! (long)

All the drama aside, I think it's just a natural progression that there is turnover on the boards. In the beginning all the topics on BHB were 'new' to me and interesting but a year into the planning I found I was much more selective about what I read and what I answered.

Same thing once I moved to the other side - I find that as new people come to the boards some of the same type of questions pop up again and again (the real estate market and buying a house, first anniversary questions, etc.) and they just don't hold the same interest after awhile, plus, as more people join, it's more likely someone has already made the point I was going to make, so why bother posting the same thing again.

Add to that the fact that the Newlywed board is getting more and more questions from brides, and the NWR has multiple posts that are more chatter than topics that interest me (not saying that's bad or wrong - just doesn't hold my interest) and I find that I bypass more and more posts and I'm starting to spend a little less time here.

It's mostly just that I've moved on - did the bridal thing, bought the house - I do enjoy the craft, garden, cooking threads and check in for those, but when they are becoming few and far between there is less here to keep me coming back. So maybe it's not the drama itself that's chasing some away, just that they've moved on.

LizD Posted: Mar 25, 2003 10:19 PM

Re: tired of all the crap! (long)

I agree with a lot of things that were said by a lot of people. I have not been around as long as some, but I can also see a change in the past couple of months. I have to say I love the NWR board, because it is a great place to go for some really fun topics (which I think we can all use right now to escape), but also I get some great advice there as well. I must say that I do tend to avoid posts by some users because they ask a questions, or make a statement that seems to be (imo) just posted to cause a drama, or they can not handle the responses that they get and they jump all over that poster and bring in more people to the drama to back them up, which is very unfortunate, but that is why I avoid them. I think the thing to do is to just avoid what you are not interested in, and post only on what you want to. I also agree that when I first came on, the people who posted the most are not on, or posting as much as they used to, but Karen said that best with her post about some things being the same, moving on, etc. I also must add that although it is the internet, I can sometimes ask things I may not always ask of people close to me, or if I want a really unbiased opinion, I do come here because I do respect almost all of the women on here and I know I may not always get the answers I want to hear, but I am getting honest answers. We just need to be mature enough to handle that without lashing out at the great ladies who are kind enough to give you their opinions.

shamma Posted: Mar 25, 2003 11:03 PM

Re: tired of all the crap! (long)

*walks around with protest sign, shouting no justice, no peace* *Leelee taps me on the shoulder to point out I am in the wrong protest* *Quickly switches signs, new sign reads *Peave Love and Soul *NO MORE DRAMA* Plays Mary J's single for the group as Theme song

allure Posted: Mar 25, 2003 11:04 PM

Re: tired of all the crap! (long)

Great idea

nycchic_24 Posted: Mar 26, 2003 05:02 PM

Re: tired of all the crap! (long)

jennbaby Posted: Mar 26, 2003 05:58 PM

Re: tired of all the crap! (long)

kelly4 Posted: Mar 26, 2003 06:18 PM

Re: tired of all the crap! (long)

It seems with all the new boards LIW has created, we need a new one. One for NO DRAMA! I can't stand it either and like others have mentioned, have spent less and less time on these boards. That is, I post less. I rather stay out of the mess than to stand knee deep in it! I have enough **** going on in my life that I'd rather not deal with this drama. I am all for helping out others if I can. I still think this place is a wonderful place to be, but still do love the old days. (sigh)