Me and my fiance are going to Atlantic city this weekend...We are seriously contemplating eloping...I am from a huge italian family...However me and my mother have been butting heads a lot....I just want to be married and living with my fiance already....I just don't want to regret my decision, but at the same time I don't see it getting any better living at home, with me and my mother constantly butting our heads....What would you guys do????
2013Bride
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Re: To elope or not to elope????
Personally, I wouldn't elope. One day you may regret not having your family and friends there with you when you got married.
I don't know if you're butting heads with your Mother about your wedding or not, but if so, and you just want to be 'over with it'- why not just move up the wedding and have a smaller wedding? (Court house?)
mattandjess2013
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Re: To elope or not to elope????
I've thought about eloping, but I know that FH & I would regret it later in life.
fdnybride163
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Re: To elope or not to elope????
Posted by mattandjess2013
I've thought about eloping, but I know that FH & I would regret it later in life.
yes I agree
There are plenty of times i want to do it on impluse but i know i would kick myself for not doing it the right way.. i have been dreaming about my wedding forever!
teacherteacher
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Re: To elope or not to elope????
If your vision of your day doesn't include family, then go for it. But, if you've at least pictured your parents and/or siblings, maybe opt for a small ceremony - courthouse or officiant at home maybe. As long as YOU don't regret it then go for it!
futuremrsznyc
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Re: To elope or not to elope????
If you are paying for the wedding, I say do it!
Think about how you will feel in 10 years, and remember that it is a big change for moms too. My mom has lost her mind throughout this process, but she finally had a breakdown about how she feels she is losing me. If I were you, I would prob just do some yoga, suck it up, and wait, but I moved 3,000 miles away from my parents 10 years ago, so that might be a little hypocritical. Follow your heart; you know what's right for you and your fiance. That is all that matters. You are entitled to do whatever makes you happy! Just don't make any decisions out of anger. I'm sure you will make the right choice!
Bride2012
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Re: To elope or not to elope????
Posted by tinydancer
Me and my fiance are going to Atlantic city this weekend...We are seriously contemplating eloping...I am from a huge italian family...However me and my mother have been butting heads a lot....I just want to be married and living with my fiance already....I just don't want to regret my decision, but at the same time I don't see it getting any better living at home, with me and my mother constantly butting our heads....What would you guys do????
I always wanted to elope because it would just be about me and my fiance. Not everyone elses wedding and opinion. I think that if you are butting heads with your mom now you definitely will more if you elope. It will get worse. Why don't you try talking to your mom? When you both are not heated and tell her how you feel. You can always move out before you get married maybe that will release some tense? Also my fiance's mom and my parents would be sad if we didn't have a wedding. This is a big moment for parents apparently.
LisaReyes
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Re: To elope or not to elope????
FH and I have considered it. We kind of had to choose between a huge wedding and eloping. We chose a huge wedding because we wanted to honor and thank our friends and family. If you want it to be just about you two - then by all means go for it!
tinydancer
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Re: To elope or not to elope????
Thank you ladies for all your responses...After thinking and reading your responses I have realized that maybe I should not rush into anything...After all I have dreamed of my wedding day my whole life!!!! :)
barbeik005
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Re: To elope or not to elope????
The longer we are engaged the more we wished we had eloped and saved money on a house. However, I've always dreamed of a big wedding with all our family and I know I would always wish I had that. I think it's worth the stress and frustration.
If you choose to elope though, you could always have a reception afterwards to celebrate with everyone. I know a few girls were married civilly but are still having a reception months/years after the fact. So no matter what, that's always an option too
cocoandrico
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Re: To elope or not to elope????
If you're worried about regrets, I would go with a hybrid wedding-elopement, meaning an option that puts the control back in your (and your fiance's) hands. Maybe have a small courthouse wedding, or throw a surprise wedding! The bottom line is you should get married in a way that you're excited about. If it's possible to include family and start your married life off on the right foot with everyone, even better. Here's an article you might like about whether or not to elope: http://www.bluecollarbride.com/etiquette-elopement/
sjr385
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Kristin31613
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Re: To elope or not to elope????
If you elope then you are going to butt heads even more. The best thing to do would to prolly move out. My relationship with my mom is so much better now that we aren't in each others faces all the time. However, this prolly isn't the best time to move out either. At any rate, eloping is NOT going to make anything better with your family, I would think worse, if anything!
tinydancer
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Re: To elope or not to elope????
Yea you guys are definitely right...I do love my family and I think I would highly regret it if I did elope...I know my family would feel hurt as would I, seeing how I dreamt of my wedding day my whole entire life....I think I have to stop acting on impulse and look at the long run and me and my mother always gets passed things like this, which we already have lol Thank you for all of your guys input it really helped me out a lot in my decision making process :)
