To invite/or not invite ...

How are you all handling inviting guests of people that do not have boyfriend/girlfriend? I thought that it was common practice to invite dates when there was a serious relationship. But now that I've sent out my invites I've gotten all types of complaints that people cannot bring dates. this is from people that aren't dating anyone at all- let alone something serious! I feel bad if I committed yet another faux-pas. If I invited all the single people with dates, that's another $6K!

Please help!!!

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I stuck with that same rule. If they were not in a serious relationship they were not invited and guest.

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I dont know what to do about this one yet! I was planning on doing the and guest thing, but I really cant afford to!

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Problem is my 3 cousins do not have 'others' and they went OFF ON ME! I'm in no mood to stake my battle lines, so I just gave in.

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FI and I layed the rules down when we started making our guest lists for our friends and family, if they are not in a serious relationship then its just them we are inviting. If that individual throws a fit then ya know oh well then dont come to our wedding. Whoever you invite should be honored enough that you invited them. A lot of times people dont realize how much money a wedding costs and how much money the bride and groom are laying out and sometimes they just cant afford to invite the whole world.

FI and I are on a budget and we are sticking to it. People have to understand we cant invite the entire world. If they are not in a serious relationship then its just the individual we are inviting.

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no way! I did that at my e-party and one of my friends brought this random chick, who not only groped one of my gf's boobs, and nearly got on top of the tables when she began to STRIP, but she also grabbed married family members and tried to get them to dance.. so NO, if they are not in a serious relationship, they will not be asked with a date.

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I agree with you.... remember this is your wedding not their wedding and they are not the one's who are paying for the wedding.

If they are that upset then they don't have to come at all!!!!!

I am inviting people who have been dating their significant others for a while and if I have met them already. I really don't want to have friends bringing a person who I have never met before to my wedding.
That is just the way that I feel. So I have told my friends if I have not met their sig other yet that they have 5 months to do so.....

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I personally am doing dates for everyone over a certain age- I think 21... but, if you have a lot of people already and your budget only allows for so many and you want to have all your loved ones there....Aunt Patty is more important than a random date who will be gone in a month.... It is YOU they are coming to see- not their date and I think what you did is fine and more than acceptable. Just my .02.

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I'm in the same boat. Most of our friends are married at this point. Friends are not my problem, it is my relatives.

I'm one of 32 first cousins (my mother was one of eleven kids), some are married and I have no problem inviting their spouse. But no way am I inviting the girlfriend of my 20 year old cousin who he just met. If they aren't married or dating someone for several years, forget it I'm not inviting them.

And if there are hard feelings then...I have lots of other cousins. We are only having 150 guests as if is and 100 of them will be related to me.

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I've always felt that if a person doesn't have a significant other at the time that they should just be invited by themselves. (The one exception for me is the bridal party--I think they should all be invited with a date.) I don't see why you should have to pay for someone that you don't even know. I know so many people who have asked a random friend or someone's brother/sister to go with them to a weddding just so they would have a date. Personally, I only want people that I know to be at my wedding, not total strangers. HOWEVER, since I started planning my wedding I know that there are many people who disagree with me! I still don't know what I am going to do because in addition to the cost issue we are limited by the size of our room. My biggest fear is that everyone won't be able to fit! I'd love to hear what everyone else thinks about this issue. I can see this becoming a problem for me in the future.

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I agree with debbie--you have too-that is an insane amount of money to spend to have total strangers at ur wedding just so the person you want there doesn't feel alone--it's not like you are letting some invite a guest and others not---you have to make a universal rule and stick to it so no one gets insulted!!

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This is a tough one b/c anything can happen - good or bad with your guests' guests. I had a similar situation, where I considered inviting certain friends who weren't married/engaged or living together w/o dates, but I didn't go through with it.

One friend was only dating her guy for a couple months, who I had only met once...but, now they are married! The other friend was dating a guy sort of on and off - someone she dated in college, and she is the type not to go ANYWHERE along. So, she brought this guy and was MISERABLE the whole night - you can even see the disgust on her face in my wedding video!

I think this depends on the person...if you think your friends/relatives are just going to bring someone they barely know, or just met, I would say you're better off inviting them alone to save yourself the aggrevation - especially if the extra people will hurt your budget.

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We invited our single friends with a guest and left it up to them if they wanted to bring someone.Much to our surprise they all came solo.

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The only time I think you really should invite someone with a guest is if they don't know anyone else at the wedding. Otherwise it's a decision based on your budget and space.

We chose to invite people with guests regardless of the length of their relationship and even spent the last few weeks trying to get a date for one of our friends so she would have someone to dance with. There were so many people at our wedding that I didnt know (co-workers spouses, DH's family I had never met, his co-workers and his father's guests) that one more unknown person to me was not going to affect me.

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Hill LOL! 5 months to find a sig. other!

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I guess my problem is that I should've made the bridal party gets dates rule... I didn't and my cousin, who's in my wedding, got annoyed.

Of course, i told her I am horrible and kissed her feet and told her to bring whomever! But now here 2 sisters want to bring someone. My step-sister is bringing her upstairs neighbor and my 16 year old brother is bringing a 14 year old.

I feel like I have NO CONTROL! On top of it- I'm so wedding-planned out I cannot even stand my ground anymore.

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Even though we were on a budget, we invited all our single friends with guests. Most of them actually ended up coming alone. JMO but I know that I would hate to have to go to a wedding alone, single or not.

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just had to say, marcellabella WOW...i can't believe that!!! LMAO!!

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I was invited to several weddings before I met my fiance, and wasn't allowed to bring a date. I understood...I actually had a better time then if I had to babysit someone.

I wasn't insulted just realized wedding can be expensive...so I'm hoping everyone has the same spirit as I do.

Besides with half the wedding being related to one another, just grab a relative to dance with....

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Personally - if my or FI's friends are not in a significant relationship, they are being invited solo. There will be plenty of other solo people for them to hang with. At $100+ a head, I can't afford for someone to bring their 'flavor of the week'.

I think as long as you're consistent with your rule, you'll be fine. You get into trouble when you start letting some bring dates and not others.

Good Luck!!!!