Good luck to the upcoming brides of '09! Here's my 2 cents:
-Dont worry about the weather. I had a very cold, beautiful day. For you winter brides, who cares how cold it is, get out there and make sure to take some outside pics. You will warm up when you go inside. Trust me, you will be glad you have outside pics, with natural light. Its only 1 day, suck it up and be cold for a few mins
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-Dont be afraid to get emotional: I am normally a ROCK, dont show emotion much, rarely cry. I didnt want to mess up my makeup either. I was 110% fine leading up to my big day, and even all day long...., until I heard the organ and the doors opened, and I walked down the aisle with my brother. I certainly teared up a bit. And also choked up a bit saying my vows.
-Eat the food: so many couples never even get a chance to eat the food you are paying all this $$ for. EAT IT! I made sure to sample some from cocktail hour and 2 entrees at dinner, and the food was great!
Go to your cocktail hour: This was a great decision, to say our hellos, so we would have more time to dance and get crazy at the reception. We also wanted to hear the acoustic guitarist we hired.
Take dance lessons if you can afford to: We didnt wanna 'rock' back n forth. We took 6 dance lessons, and our 1st dance was AWESOME. Also, we didnt tell anyone we were taking them, so it was a huge surprise when we got out there, and killed it! The dance was beautiful, and was timed perfectly, right down to the dip at the very end of the song. People went nuts... we both also enjoyed taking the lessons, esp DH.
Communicate what you want to your vendors: This may be odd, but I brought pics of everything I wanted to each vendor, instead of trying to convey what I was looking for. I found the cake I wanted, brought the pic to the baker, he made the cake perfectly. I knew what type of dress I wanted, I brought a few pics with me to the bridal stores, so they didnt pull dresses that they wanted. Brought 10 pics to the florist, I said make this for me exactly as it's shown, and they did. Cut out pics from mags and online, keep it in your book. When you go and meet with everyone, show them, that way there is no miscommunication.
Dont listen to everyone's commentary: This is your and DH's day. Do what you want. it's not 'customary' to go to your CH? Who cares. You are worried about dancing with your mom instead? so what, it's your day, and I did, and loved it. Your future 11 y/o niece and their family is throwing a fit that she was not asked to be a FG? No, sorry, you are too old, we will find something else for you to do at church. Your aunt makes comments about not having the chicken dance, and electric slide played? Just forget about all the comments, and suggestions, and dont worry about who you will disappoint. Just do what you and your DH want...
Make a play/do not play list: I met with my DJ 2 days before and we were very very very specific what we wanted played, and what we didnt want. We are big into music, and I had a really long list of what I didnt want played, which alot of the list was 'typical wedding music'. PLease be very clear with your DJ, so you are not disappointed with the music. Our DJ was on point, and understood the type of music we wanted, and did not want.
Add special touches: It took us forever to make our menus. Were they necessary? No, but they looked really nice. We also made our place cards, and table #'s and Unity candle. So many people noticed these little things, and it makes your wedding a little unique, and less 'cookie-cutter'.
I will also agree with what Jessesgirl wrote about taking care of yourself: Get sleep that week of the wedding, and esp before the wedding night. I popped half an AMBIEN, and got a nice 8 hours in. You dont need to be cranky and tired, its a really long day. Also, I wanted to feel the most beautiful I have ever felt this day... I wanted to feel confident and look great, mostly for DH, but also because you are paying serious cash for your photo/video. You will have these pics for the rest of your life. I started hitting the gym on a serious level 1 year before my wedding, right after Thanksgiving 2007. I lost inches, and toned up so much. I always knew I wanted to wear a mermaid dress, and not hitting the gym was NOT AN OPTION.
Also, i know hair and makeup can get expensive. But if you know of someone and you love their work, if you are able to afford it, go for it. Again, you will look at these pics forever, and you want to love how you look. Fortunately I spent way less than $1k on my dress, so I felt I could somewhat splurge on my hair/makeup.
Make your FH help you: Planning this day was very stressful at times, financially and just overhwhelming in general. I live in FL, and planned every single aspect by myself, with minimal help from DH. My mom and aunt beautifully wrapped my favors. I relied alot on the internet and ebay, and this site too. Just when you think its so overwhelming and you dont know where to begin, you will figure it out. Trust me, I did it from 1,500 miles away, and it all worked out perfect. Learn to let some things go. If the shade of your napkins is slightly off, dont fret, no one is gonna notice. Letting stuff like that roll off your back, will be the only way you will survive, or you will drive yourself insane.
And finally... my DOC: She made my wedding flawless. Nothing but great things to say - she was a lifesaver. I was a little unsure what she was really gonna do for me, seeing I had booked all my vendors, did everything myself, but on your wedding day, you really do need an extra pair of experienced hands to make your day run smooth.
Good luck ladies!!!!!
ETA: a few more
