UH OH!! I'm going to kill my FI!! I'm so embarrassed

JZNCK Posted: Dec 29, 2003 01:33 PM

UH OH!! I'm going to kill my FI!! I'm so embarrassed

In OCTOBER we went to my FI cousins wedding, and i assumed that he brought the card, with money as a gift for HIS cousin.. Well, I was at my FMIL's house and his cousin was there, at the end of the night before she left, she pulled me aside and asked me if we left a gift/card because some of her stuff was missing from the hall and she didn't see our gift there. UGGHH!!! THen I said, I'm pretty sure that jonathan left the card.. NO HE FORGOT IT!!!! All this time, and we didn't even give a gift!!! I'm so embarrassed.. It's his cousin, he told me we were giving them $300 I thought that was nice, so I agreed.> I didn't know that he wanted me to write the check.. what am I going to do?? what should I say to her.. I feel so bad.. we didn't even leave a card.. it did upset me though because she pulled ME aside to as ME.. Not my FH which is her cousin.. So now I feel like CRAP.. I have the check and the card, and I'm ready to send it, but what should I write in the card????? HELP

ETA: I didn't even think of the gift that day, i just assumed he had it.. i feel so DUMB

Valentinegirl Posted: Dec 29, 2003 01:37 PM

Re: UH OH!! I'm going to kill my FI!! I'm so embarrassed

I would just tell the truth. It could happen to anyone.

AUG21-04 Posted: Dec 29, 2003 01:41 PM

Re: UH OH!! I'm going to kill my FI!! I'm so embarrassed

yeah I would just tell her the truth. After all it is HER cousin and YOU didn't forget FH did. They would be glad for the late cash flow anyway.

halloweenbride04 Posted: Dec 29, 2003 01:41 PM

Re: UH OH!! I'm going to kill my FI!! I'm so embarrassed

Maybe you can call and apologize profusely and play it off as you thought he brought it and he thought you brought it so it never came up...yadda, yadda, yadda!

Something similiar happened to me too. FH never sent the reply back for HIS friend's wedding so the bride called FSIL and FSIL called ME to find out if we were going. I guess people always assume that the woman is in charge of these things and now we see why we should be!

JZNCK Posted: Dec 29, 2003 01:45 PM

Re: UH OH!! I'm going to kill my FI!! I'm so embarrassed

his cousin and her parents and sister, are sooo materialistic, so I can't even imagine what there saying.. so anyway.. I'm e-mailing her and telling her what happened, and I'll send out the card and money tomorrow.. Thanks guys.. I am doing everything from now on.. Then i'll know it's getting done.. LOL..

neesiepie Posted: Dec 29, 2003 01:45 PM

Re: UH OH!! I'm going to kill my FI!! I'm so embarrassed

that was a simple mistake. Just say there was a miscommunication and sorry this is so late....the wedding was wonderful, blah blah blah....
you're only human!

MrsTC Posted: Dec 29, 2003 01:46 PM

Re: UH OH!! I'm going to kill my FI!! I'm so embarrassed

MEN!!

I would just mail a check with a little note explaining. Better late than never!

tourist Posted: Dec 29, 2003 02:25 PM

Re: UH OH!! I'm going to kill my FI!! I'm so embarrassed

The official ettiquette rule is that you have up to a year to send a gift , so technically, you're ok.

julybride444 Posted: Dec 29, 2003 02:44 PM

Re: UH OH!! I'm going to kill my FI!! I'm so embarrassed

I'd write a nice card, but I'd call her and tell her what happened. She'll understand, this stuff happens!

MarcellaBella Posted: Dec 29, 2003 02:46 PM

Re: UH OH!! I'm going to kill my FI!! I'm so embarrassed

She may be telling you about these stolen envelopes just to get that gift from you..

Maribelle7777 Posted: Dec 29, 2003 02:50 PM

Re: UH OH!! I'm going to kill my FI!! I'm so embarrassed

OK
I'm not really for lying about stuff like this because of karma and things coming to bite you in the arse later on..but..

You can say 'listen since you cannot find some stuff from the wedding, we decided to stop payment the check we originally gave you on your wedding day so it cannot be cashed and resend you another one'.

That way you don't look like you forgot and you still send something.

If you don't want to lie, then just say 'when I was talking to FH about what happened, we realized that we forgot to put the check in your card. Thank God it was not with the stuff you cannot find!'

No one is going to kill you for forgetting. At least it wasn't like you put $300 in cash in the card and it got lost.

franksbride Posted: Dec 29, 2003 02:56 PM

Re: UH OH!! I'm going to kill my FI!! I'm so embarrassed

I agree with what Marcella said...that maybe that story was made up to see if you guys gave a gift.

But, I'd just tell her the truth about what happened and send that card NOW!

nan&dave Posted: Dec 29, 2003 02:59 PM

Re: UH OH!! I'm going to kill my FI!! I'm so embarrassed

Tell the truth. Men are crazy.

JZNCK Posted: Dec 29, 2003 03:01 PM

Re: UH OH!! I'm going to kill my FI!! I'm so embarrassed

She may be telling you about these stolen envelopes just to get that gift from you..

oh i know it was made up.. she would lie abnout that.

paintbrush91 Posted: Dec 29, 2003 09:00 PM

Re: UH OH!! I'm going to kill my FI!! I'm so embarrassed

tell her the truth, she will understand
maybe take them to dinner as an extra gift

JZNCK Posted: Dec 29, 2003 09:03 PM

Re: UH OH!! I'm going to kill my FI!! I'm so embarrassed

Ok update,
i e-mailed her, because she lives in MA and I'm in GA, and I apologized and asked for her new address (she just moved) and explained to her what happened,and I told her that we were very thankful that she let us share in her day, and it was beautiful. etc. .She said no problem.. I feel better.. It's just embarrassing.. I told FI that I'm handling all christmas,birthday, wedding, etc gifts... from now on..

sa070204 Posted: Dec 29, 2003 09:07 PM

Re: UH OH!! I'm going to kill my FI!! I'm so embarrassed

Glad it worked out for you.

butterfly20 Posted: Dec 29, 2003 10:30 PM

Re: UH OH!! I'm going to kill my FI!! I'm so embarrassed

glad it worked out,
i guess it takes a woman to get stuff done

isopodi Posted: Dec 30, 2003 09:55 AM

Re: UH OH!! I'm going to kill my FI!! I'm so embarrassed

We had a somewhat of a similar problem at our wedding. My older cousin came to our wedding and accidently left our gift ( a card with $200 in cash) on our table. Well, unfortuantely, some dishonest waiter must have picked it up and pocketed it. My mom let my Aunt know not so that we could get another gift - but to (A)let my cousin know not to leave envelopes filled with cash on a table and also It sounds stupid but I wasn't sure what to write in the Thank you card since we never received anything from him.

My cousin was so upset that we never got his gift that he gave us another $200 in cash the next time we saw him. We didn't want to take it and insisted against it for 30 minutes back and forth and ultimately ended up taking it just to please him.