Last night FH told me something FMIL told him recently -- the day before our wedding they were invited to another wedding and they are going to it! This person isn't even very close to them, because I had never heard of this person before and they aren't inivited to out wedding (not even listed on FMIL's C list!).
FMIL and FFIL will be missing the entire day before our wedding, and we have lots of family showing up that weekend and I could imagine that the day before the wedding there will be lots of last minute stuff going on! FH and I feel like they shouldn't even feel obligated to go to this other wedding -- after all, they have a pretty valid excuse ('well my son is getting married the NEXT DAY and we have about ten million things to deal with!'). And they are going to be dancing and celebrating the day before our wedding -- so what, are they going to be too tired at our wedding to dance too much?
Thanks for reading my long vent! FH is just as annoyed as I am! Can you imagine if your mom told you that the day before the biggest day of your life she was going to someone else's event and was going to be missing for 8 hours?
DonnaPWhite1124
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Re: Unbelievable story from FMIL! VENT/RANT
Maybe they feel as though they would be 'in the way' if that makes any sense. Some people get like that.
Is your rehearsal dinner that night?
Future Mrs Roo
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Re: Unbelievable story from FMIL! VENT/RANT
wow, that is messed up. I would be pissed too.
VickiR510
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Re: Unbelievable story from FMIL! VENT/RANT
Geez, I couldnt imagine that because my parents would never do that! EVER! Especially with family form OOT in etc. Im not sure if u r doing a rehearsal dinner but mine is the night b4 the wedding so my parents wil be with us! Maybe FH should ask them to reconsider & explainto them why & that you may needsome of their help with things. And express his concerns abotu hem being tired the next day. A wedding day is a long day even for the parents. Wow how selfish to not think abotu these things!
Cacarina
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Re: Unbelievable story from FMIL! VENT/RANT
I have no words!!!!
NickandTara426
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Re: Unbelievable story from FMIL! VENT/RANT
I would be upset too! I can't believe that!
DonnaPWhite1124
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Re: Unbelievable story from FMIL! VENT/RANT
Maybe Im the weirdo here, but I think I'd be a little bit relieved. If I really didnt need them for anything, and the rehearsal wasnt going on, then I'd be ok with it.
However, if the rehearsal was going on, yeah I'd be pissed.
littlepixie12
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Re: Unbelievable story from FMIL! VENT/RANT
hmm .. how does your FH feel about this?
EsquireBride
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Re: Unbelievable story from FMIL! VENT/RANT
Posted by DonnaPWhite1124
Maybe they feel as though they would be 'in the way' if that makes any sense. Some people get like that.
Is your rehearsal dinner that night?
I understand about her feeling 'in the way' but with all this family coming in, you would think she might want to entertain some of them or something -- keep them out of the way too!
We didn't even schedule the dinner yet. She decided that since nothing had been scheduled yet on that day that it was free -- she never even asked what the plan was, and apparently they have already told this other person they are coming to that wedding. The other person's reception is supposed to end at 9, so obviously having any sort of family dinner the night before my OWN wedding is not going to happen! My parents are traveling in from another state and we are having the wedding in FMIL and FFIL's hometown on LI, and so they have sort of been acting as the 'hosts' and now they are disappearing! FH thinks it is really messed up.
DonnaPWhite1124
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Re: Unbelievable story from FMIL! VENT/RANT
mmmm...I can see the frustration in that.
So its like rearranging what would have been the rehearsal dinner for another night because they're going to the other reception.
Yeah I'd probably be pissed if that was the case
EsquireBride
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Re: Unbelievable story from FMIL! VENT/RANT
Posted by littlepixie12
hmm .. how does your FH feel about this?
FH is upset. He feels sort of slighted, like his parents think his wedding is no big deal and they can just throw on some clothes and show up the next day.
DonnaPWhite1124
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Re: Unbelievable story from FMIL! VENT/RANT
Is he open with his parents? If he's upset, and you are aswell, maybe he should say something to them.
If I get upset at FILs for something, I make C tell them. He's the spokesperson, I clam up and get nervous. So maybe having your FH say something will make them see where you're coming from.
evewedsjc
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Re: Unbelievable story from FMIL! VENT/RANT
that is the strangest thing i ever heard.....
beram63
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Re: Unbelievable story from FMIL! VENT/RANT
Posted by EsquireBride
Posted by DonnaPWhite1124
Maybe they feel as though they would be 'in the way' if that makes any sense. Some people get like that.
Is your rehearsal dinner that night?
I understand about her feeling 'in the way' but with all this family coming in, you would think she might want to entertain some of them or something -- keep them out of the way too!
We didn't even schedule the dinner yet. She decided that since nothing had been scheduled yet on that day that it was free -- she never even asked what the plan was, and apparently they have already told this other person they are coming to that wedding. The other person's reception is supposed to end at 9, so obviously having any sort of family dinner the night before my OWN wedding is not going to happen! My parents are traveling in from another state and we are having the wedding in FMIL and FFIL's hometown on LI, and so they have sort of been acting as the 'hosts' and now they are disappearing! FH thinks it is really messed up.
it would bother me if only for the RD. it's super inconsiderate.
baba022
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Re: Unbelievable story from FMIL! VENT/RANT
Thats messed up!!! Neither my parents or fh's parents would do that!! And to be honest, fh should defintly talk to them because that is not right. I would be pissed!!! You would think they would want to help out or something.....or just be around in case you need them for any reason.....
iYexie
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Re: Unbelievable story from FMIL! VENT/RANT
They shouldn't go!!!!!!!!
MrsDtoBe09
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Re: Unbelievable story from FMIL! VENT/RANT
Wow that stinks! In my opinion though, its best to choose your battles wisely. While this is inconvenient, is it worth a blowout?
carolinebr
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Re: Unbelievable story from FMIL! VENT/RANT
You have a few months for them to change their mind & do the right thing. I'm sure they haven't even gotten their inviations yet so they are not committed. Don't get too upset yet.
That being said, every family & every wedding is different but they are 'supposed' to not only attend your RD, but pay for it. Are they cheap? Are they having financial trouble? If so, this may be their way of getting out of it. Just a thought.
EsquireBride
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Re: Unbelievable story from FMIL! VENT/RANT
Posted by carolinebr
Are they having financial trouble? If so, this may be their way of getting out of it. Just a thought.
Nope, no financial trouble. We just helped them book their January vacation to Mexico.
littlepixie12
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Re: Unbelievable story from FMIL! VENT/RANT
Posted by EsquireBride
Posted by littlepixie12
hmm .. how does your FH feel about this?
FH is upset. He feels sort of slighted, like his parents think his wedding is no big deal and they can just throw on some clothes and show up the next day.
I dont understand that at all? I mean if that couple/family was coming to your wedding I could understand because they would be repaying the favor but their not!
