FI asked me to ask'the girls online'! FSIL called me & said she was 'hurt' by what I said (it was FI who said it) when we told her we are not having kids at the wedding. I am having a FG & RB-my cousin's children who I am close with-& they will be introduced at the reception & will leave with my cousin's in-laws. FSIL is hurt because her son's children (3 & 6) will not be invited & she is afraid that then her son & DIL will not come. FI's sister is a woman in her 50's who I asked to be in the BP (because she told FMIL that she would be upset if she wasn't asked). She said to not invite her son's children is a disgrace & she has to fight for them. She also said there is no way we can have a day wedding without inviting kids. Frankly, FI doesn't like his nephew & honestly would not care if he did not show up, & he is now yelling at me for even asking FSIL to be a BM. She kept saying - they are my grandchildren - they are NOT COUSINS! Are we way off here? We don't want kids - we are especially afraid of turning the affair into a playground! FI wants to know - does 'ettiquette' dictate that we must invite his nephew's children? My mom is having a party tonight for FSIL's whole family & mine - this may just ruin it!! Please help! Thanks!
wacky
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Re: FIL Help needed desperately PLEASE - LONG!
Im sorry but this woman sounds like a Drama Queen. If you want no kids thats your decision, if she doesnt come oh well. Don tlet her take advantage of you. You do not have to please everyone including hte grooms side of the family.
Tell them to hire a babysitter and thats it. Less fuel for the fire, I wouldnt even listen to her.
Good luck
MaryK
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Update - FIL Help needed desperately PLEASE - LONG!
Well I called FSIL back and it seemed as though she may have realized it's not her wedding and none of her business. Byt he time I spoke to her again she just kepy saying it was my perrogative (sp?) to invite children or not. Darn right...! LOL
Well she came to the party that night, as did everyone else (including FG & RB's parents) and everything went fine. Though I could feel in my heart a little distant toward her, I do hope we'll get past this.
Thank you all again for your opinions and support - you guys are the best!
JoRo
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Re: Update - FIL Help needed desperately PLEASE - LONG!
Thanks for updating us. But i have to say, i am still burning for you. I just cannot believe people! First of all, day wedding means nothing. it is your perogative. we are having a SUNDAY wedding, and fairly informal, and still no kids. that is just us. i think kids at a wedding can be great, but it is not for me. Second, how old is this woman (i mean in mental health years). Sounds to me like she would rather be the center of attention and running the show, rather than giving you the support that she should be giving you as a member of your bridal party. I am so pO'd for you. She should be happy for you. and since she was really hungering for the honor of being one of your maids, she should be falling over herself doing a good job at being there for you. not throwing ulcers your way!!! Goodness! i truly hope you will be able to move on and not react as i have (i am so mad ) and i am sure you will since you sound like a really good person. but i tell you, if she tries to start any more trouble, i suggest you ask her if she truly wants to be in your bridal party and let her know you would understand if it is too much for her (since she is going through her own little personal crises that she seems to create for herself!) boy i am steamed!!
I am so glad it worked out and you handled it so well!!! good luck in the future!
