Sorry to vent..... but my maid of honor is acting ridiculous right now!
my wedding is in 15 days and tells me that she is wearing her hair in 'flat twists'!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I am sorry, but that is not what my fh (her brother), myself and her had agreed on months ago.
I am not a bridezilla, but I believe I am turning into one for this one small thing.
I told her that if she wears her hair in flat twists, she will NOT be in any of our professional pics...she cursed me out and then hung up the phone.
Am I wrong for telling her that?
I just think that the hairstyle she says she is going to wear is not appropriate for my wedding!
Here is the update...
I called her and calmly discussed the reasons why she wants that specific hairstlye and if they were any other haristyles she would consider...
her answer 'I WILL WEAR MY HAIR HOWEVER I F***ING FEEL LIKE IT! I DON'T GIVE A S**T WHAT YOU OR MY BROTHER SAYS, IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT...YOU CAN TAKE MY DRESS AND GIVE IT TO YOUR SISTER TO WEAR' click-she hung up on my AGAIN
prinses777
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Re: Maid of Honor DRAMA
Posted by carolinep24
so what if prinses77 let her BM choose what they will wear etc etc. good for her! I'm a more lenient bride as well but i dont expect everyone else to be.
You obviously missed the point... All I was saying is she chose this MOH for a reason... Because it is obviously a very close friend and someone who she truly loves... Don't let something like HAIR come between the relationship... is HAIR something really that big to argue about with your friend that she hung up the phone on her?
Its not worth it... that is my only point. But... you took 1 sentence out of context and quoted it... That was NOT the point of my post.
MJDoc12
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Re: Maid of Honor DRAMA
Posted by prinses777
Posted by carolinep24
so what if prinses77 let her BM choose what they will wear etc etc. good for her! I'm a more lenient bride as well but i dont expect everyone else to be.
You obviously missed the point... All I was saying is she chose this MOH for a reason... Because it is obviously a very close friend and someone who she truly loves... Don't let something like HAIR come between the relationship... is HAIR something really that big to argue about with your friend that she hung up the phone on her?
Its not worth it... that is my only point. But... you took 1 sentence out of context and quoted it... That was NOT the point of my post.
this is why i posted that kittens pic....cause its a lost cause now. its almost like this has been split 50/50 by the 'I'm the bride and the BP should do what I want' and the 'I'm the bride and I don't care too much about making sure they do what i want'
SeptBride70
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Re: Maid of Honor DRAMA
Posted by MJDoc12
yikes...this thread got way out of hand!!
but just wanted to say....you picked your MOH for a reason--if she has flat twists in her her, well it won't be the end of the world. and who knows, it might look really good on her.
i think we sometimes focus on the things that really just do not matter at all. to tell your MOH that she won't be allowed in pics cause of her hairstyle just seems so dramatic. in the grand scheme of things, is it really that big of a deal? your MOH is supposed to be about the person who is most important and stands besides you as you get married. as long as she looks presentable, i don't see the big hoop-la over her hair style.
this goes back to the Already Married Brides Thread that we all love--and the #1 thing that is said on there from past brides to future bride: Don't sweat the small stuff
This person is your FH's SIL and your STB SIL, you will have to be friends with her for the rest of your married life, is the entire relationship worth souring over a HAIRSTYLE??
take a moment and step back from this all and see how its really not such a huge deal after all.
I agree
And I'm slightly b/c I wore those twists to my senior prom as part of my 'up do' and I thought it looked so cool... LOL that was the style then for prom girls to wear... and I'm about the whitest white girl there is.
I wish I had a pic on here but I don't.
twinkle164
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Re: Maid of Honor DRAMA
Posted by MJDoc12
wow this sure did spark some fire didn't it!?
at this point i hope the OP and her FSIL can resolve this issue without drama---but this thread itself has kind of gotten crazy...and...
KITTIES!!!!!
lilone9
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Re: Maid of Honor DRAMA
Posted by FullersBride
Posted by Kelly79
OH HEEEEELLLLLLSSSS NO!!!!!!!!!
What is she on? Not for the wedding uh-uh!
ksl268
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Re: Maid of Honor DRAMA
Personally, I think you may be a little over the top. Think about why you picked this person to be in your wedding, not b/c of her hair. She is obviously someone close to both of you. I wouldn't let her hair style get in the way of that. Remember these people are friends and family there to share your day. Sometimes I think it can get a little out of hand trying to get everyone to match and forgetting that they have individual styles/personalities.
znycgirl
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Re: Maid of Honor DRAMA
Thanks: I was looking for a drama thread.... Makes me feel better about the fact that this is something I will NOT have to deal with...
My bridesmaids are BEGGING me to pick a hairstyle for them all & I want them all to be different as long as it's elegant.
Regal Beagle
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Re: Maid of Honor DRAMA
Posted by FullersBride
Posted by Kelly79
OH HEEEEELLLLLLSSSS NO!!!!!!!!!
I just said the same thing!
stephanief
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Re: Updated-Maid of Honor DRAMA
honestly, I think she should be able to wear her hair how she wants but that is my personal opinion....
she was out on line to talk to you like that though
Renee615
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Re: Updated-Maid of Honor DRAMA
Posted by FullersBride
Posted by prinses777
Posted by Kelly79
I do not know how to say what I am about to say without offending someone.... I want to apologize in advance.. but she is not of black decent
Honestly... I think you are over reacting... 1st they are called CORN ROWS...
2nd Def not ONLY a 'black decent' thing...
I think if you wanted her to be your Maid of Honor it wasn't becuase of her hair and it shouldn't stop now...
I don't mean to offend you... but I truly hate coming on this site and seeing girls react about what other people are doing... So your MOH wants to have conrows... WHO CARES... it WILL NOT ruin the pictures... so you aren't going to have the 1 person who you chose to be your MOH, that is one of the most important people in your life or you wouldn't have chosen her to be in the pictures becuase she wants to have corn rows?
I would also like to know if braids are only a 'black decent' thing now too? French braids??? are those only for 'black decent people?
I know that you didn't mean to offend anyone... but you def are going to.
I don't think that is fair for you to say. We all talk on here and plan to have the perfect day. Don't we choose our BM dresses, sometimes shoes and jewlry for them??? Why can't she have a say in how she wears her hair?? We have a say in everything else!!!
Traditionallly corn rows has been a hairstyle used by people of African American decent because of they type of hair they have. This style of hair was easier for them to manage and take care of.
She did not say that they are the only race that chooses to wear this hairstyle.
Also, how many African American brides do you see wearing corn rows in their hair on their wedding day??? Not many, because it is a casual hairstyle.
I think she has every right to be upset. It is her wedding and she is entitled to her own vision on what she wants that day.
JMO................
BTW: I'm a Latina and have had corn rows in my hair when I went to Jamaica and I LOVED THEM!!! Cute summer hairstyle. But I don't think they are appropriate for a NY wedding.
You said exactly what I was thinking. I absolutely agree.
Dani731
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Re: Updated-Maid of Honor DRAMA
twinkle164
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Re: Updated-Maid of Honor DRAMA
Posted by Kelly79
Here is the update...
I called her and calmly discussed the reasons why she wants that specific hairstlye and if they were any other haristyles she would consider...
her answer 'I WILL WEAR MY HAIR HOWEVER I F***ING FEEL LIKE IT! I DON'T GIVE A S**T WHAT YOU OR MY BROTHER SAYS, IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT...YOU CAN TAKE MY DRESS AND GIVE IT TO YOUR SISTER TO WEAR' click-she hung up on my AGAIN
Oh sorry. That doesn't sound good. Don't know what to say. I know the stress of weddings has broken up more than one friendship. I hope it works out. Good luck.
bettybcafe
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Re: Updated-Maid of Honor DRAMA
Thats sad..if my MOH came out with something like that I would be crying my eyes out... Im so sorry that she is putting you through this..
sugarkube4
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Re: Updated-Maid of Honor DRAMA
F THAT.. tell her to give you the dress and call it a day.. she's selfish..
Pencils
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Re: Updated-Maid of Honor DRAMA
Here's a different take on this--is it possible that she's doing this as a way to make you mad? That she wants to get out of being the MOH but she doesn't want to quit, she wants it to be your fault? Have you had issues with her lately other than this? Is she the sort of person who would suddenly decide she wanted an unusual hairstyle (for her)? Because if not, I bet there's something else going on. This might not be about hair--maybe she's mad at you for some other reason and this is her 'rebellion' at your wedding.
Posted by Kelly79 why she wants that specific hairstlye and if they were any other haristyles she would consider...
her answer 'I WILL WEAR MY HAIR HOWEVER I F***ING FEEL LIKE IT! I DON'T GIVE A S**T WHAT YOU OR MY BROTHER SAYS, IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT...YOU CAN TAKE MY DRESS AND GIVE IT TO YOUR SISTER TO WEAR' click-she hung up on my AGAIN
DonnaPWhite1124
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Re: Updated-Maid of Honor DRAMA
Sorry to intrude Im an 09 bride and Ive been having moh issues myself...she first of all seemed a little pissed at me for getting engaged and then she said shes wearing sneakers to the wedding! hellooo i mean really. what is up with these chicks?!
Cant she just get an updo?? Good luck with the wedding Im sure it will be wonderful anyway
bemyyoko
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Re: Updated-Maid of Honor DRAMA
Posted by DonnaPWhite1124
Sorry to intrude Im an 09 bride and Ive been having moh issues myself...she first of all seemed a little pissed at me for getting engaged and then she said shes wearing sneakers to the wedding! hellooo i mean really. what is up with these chicks?!
Cant she just get an updo?? Good luck with the wedding Im sure it will be wonderful anyway
08 bride here and this is totally off topic from the OP but i'm wearing sneakers at my own wedding lol if my MOH said she would to i'd be schocked and honored and hug her... b/c she's just not like that.
MOH... can't live with them... can't live without them.
MJDoc12
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Re: Updated-Maid of Honor DRAMA
Posted by Kelly79 why she wants that specific hairstlye and if they were any other haristyles she would consider...
her answer 'I WILL WEAR MY HAIR HOWEVER I F***ING FEEL LIKE IT! I DON'T GIVE A S**T WHAT YOU OR MY BROTHER SAYS, IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT...YOU CAN TAKE MY DRESS AND GIVE IT TO YOUR SISTER TO WEAR' click-she hung up on my AGAIN
Posted by Pencils
Here's a different take on this--is it possible that she's doing this as a way to make you mad? That she wants to get out of being the MOH but she doesn't want to quit, she wants it to be your fault? Have you had issues with her lately other than this? Is she the sort of person who would suddenly decide she wanted an unusual hairstyle (for her)? Because if not, I bet there's something else going on. This might not be about hair--maybe she's mad at you for some other reason and this is her 'rebellion' at your wedding.
i was thinking the same thing--like she's looking for a reason to be kicked out, so she can say it was all you?
perhaps she was still angry about being told she wouldn't be able to be in the pics with her hairstyle and that's why she snapped and cursed you out?
sorry you are dealing with all this close to the wedding. hope it all works out.
Bride4Mike07
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Re: Updated-Maid of Honor DRAMA
Good....then you can have some1 else be your MOH. I hate ppl with that type of attitude! It's not her wedding, it's YOUR wedding and you have her hair any way YOU want!!! You know for my wedding all the BMs are wearing their hair the same. My MOH is wearing her hair differently, FG is having a hairstyle similar to mine but a cross between me and the BMs....I must say, they all asked me how they should wear their hair, including my FGs mom! Ppl need to be more understanding and cooperative, seems like she's not trying to be, so maybe you don't need her in you wedding party. Maybe there's some1 else that can be more understanding, problem is that I'm sure no1 is going to want to do it now so close to the date. I would talk w/ FH and see what you guys want. If she's not really needed, then you should just leave her out! Sorry it sounds bad...JMO.. Good Luck, keep us updated!
joan_db
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Re: Updated-Maid of Honor DRAMA
Listen...in my opinion...if she is giving you this kind of stress...well then take her out of your wedding party.
In every wedding there is alway someone who is not please/happy on something. Why bother entertaining them and giving yourself a headache? Its obvious that she is angry on something but you are not a mind reader. Unless she tells you what really upsets her no one would know. So she wants out...then KICK HER OUT!!! enough is enough. Its your wedding and you need to focus on what will makes you happy.
