I guess sometimes there's just that friend that you knock yourself out for, make sure to always make it to their parties, and their wedding, give a generous gift, spend the money to stay at the hotel, etc and d amned if they can't make it to any of my events, not my birthday party, not even my wedding.......not to mention they got married July '05 and I still haven't gotten a frikkin' thank you card and they JUST now asked for my address again to send the TY (saying I must not have been on their original list for thank yous.....uhhhhh WHAT!?!?!?).
And ummmm, my address hasn't changed. you didn't have any problem finding it when you were asking me to go to your destination wedding?!?!?!?!
ok, maybe this didn't turn out to be as 'mini' of a vent as I originally thought......but it's almost 1a.m. and i'm beat and really sad that after all these years, they're probably not coming to my wedding.
Can anyone relate?
Some hugs might help.....please.
sarahradio5
Posted:
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Re: upset about a 'friend'
Aw! I'm so sorry! Having met you, I know you're such a sweet person, and you don't deserve to be treated like this! I think we all 'discover' these 'less than friends' during this whole wedding process... it's kind of like a right of passage for brides. I'm sorry you're feeling sad. I guess it's better to learn this lesson now... only give of yourself to the people who deserve it. That's what I'm getting out of this whole wedding planning thing.
And know that you are loved here and by the people closest to you - the rest just aren't worth being sad over.
Any time you need hugs, let us know!
Smiles111
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Re: upset about a 'friend'
Posted by craigshunny
It sounds like unfortunately this is a 'friend' you can do without. Unless it's about her, she seems to be not interested. You are probably better off without her in your life. I completely understand why you are sad, though. I think we've all had people like this in our lives at one time or another.
Exactly. The story always changes. I guess it's always sad to come to the final realization, though! Thanks so much!
Smiles111
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Re: upset about a 'friend'
Posted by SummerBride06
i have a friend like that as well...and we're growing apart now because i don't think she values our friendship
Right, that's it. Thx for helping me put my finger on it. There's a difference in how much value we each put on the friendship. Sometimes having it encapsulated like that really helps!!
It's amazing how many people are going thru similar things!
Smiles111
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Re: upset about a 'friend'
Posted by shellibean
I am having similar issues with a friend and BM. I am just so let down by her blase attitude towards my wedding, and just regreting that she is even in the wedding party! UUGGHH!!!!!
Ugh, that's even worse that she's in your BP!!!!
Smiles111
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Re: upset about a 'friend'
Posted by ML110
i can TOTALLY relate!! i have a friend who i've known since 3rd grade- we are like sisters. BUT, somehow i always seem to be at the bottom of her ' priority' list. about a year ago, she got married and moved 2 hours away. i've been out tiwce to see her house, meet her for lunch.. but she has yet to come visit me in my new house. BUT, she finds time to drive 2 hours for another friend's 2-year-old's birthday party and things like that all the time also, we were in each others weddings last year. her shower was a month before mine- it was at her neighbors house, and i did so much for it. made the favors, made flower-shaped chocolate lolllipops, went early to help set up, stayed late to help clean up.... BUT, when it came time for my shower, she left while i was opening presents! all the sudden she goes ' oh i have to go- i'm going out to dinner for my fiance's birthday' um... ok. that couldn't wait another half hour until i'm at least done opening presents?? it was just sort of a slap in the face after all i had done for her shower.... LOL wow! guess i needed to vent too!!! but just wanted to let you know that you're NOT alone... its sad, but some people just dont' have a lot of loyalty....
OMG< thanks SO much for this post. I'm so sorry you've had such a rotten experience also! What you describe is so similar. This message board is soooo therapeutic though. All of these responses are REALLY making me feel so much better!
Smiles111
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Re: upset about a 'friend'
Posted by sr081906
It does look like it's all about her. I would express my feeling about it. I think from what you wrote you already know the answer. She is well 'over' you or maybe was never really a friend the way you thought she was. I am sure this is disappointing and hurtful if you have made a point to always be there for her and now you feel she just used you all those years.
Unfortunatelly, there are people like that. They don't always realize what they do. They do it to everyone. Meanwhile we have true feelings and attachment for them and it saddens us when we realize they don't feel the same way we do.
Sophie, thanks so much for your understanding and kind words!
Smiles111
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Re: upset about a 'friend'
Posted by sarahradio5
Aw! I'm so sorry! Having met you, I know you're such a sweet person, and you don't deserve to be treated like this! I think we all 'discover' these 'less than friends' during this whole wedding process... it's kind of like a right of passage for brides. I'm sorry you're feeling sad. I guess it's better to learn this lesson now... only give of yourself to the people who deserve it. That's what I'm getting out of this whole wedding planning thing.
And know that you are loved here and by the people closest to you - the rest just aren't worth being sad over.
Any time you need hugs, let us know!
Sarah, what you wrote was sooooooooo nice!! Thank you SO much for the support. I truly appreciate it!!
LIWers are the bestest!!
SunBride07
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Re: upset about a 'friend'
I can totally relate! I am in the same situation now and it feels really horrible
sr081906
Posted:
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Re: upset about a 'friend'
Yes.... LIW brides are the bestest!!!!! I have realized that. We go through dramas and can find people who 'understand' without necessarily judging us.
Smiles111
Posted:
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Re: upset about a 'friend'
Posted by sr081906
Yes.... LIW brides are the bestest!!!!! I have realized that. We go through dramas and can find people who 'understand' without necessarily judging us.
