So my husband and I are running into an interesting dilemma with some friends weddings we have coming up later this year. We have 3 weddings for the rest of the year none of which we will be able to travel up to NY for to attend (we live down in Virginia). All three couples attended our wedding in NY last month and gave typical guest gifts ($250-$350 per couple). Now typically when my hubby and I don't go to a wedding I will either send a gift from the registry or I will send a $100 check with our 'no' response. Does this fly for these weddings we have coming up or do we need to reciprocate the larger gift amount? If we go to a wedding we always give $300-$350 but I just cant see sending that when we are not attending. What do you girls think? Anyone know any etiquette on this?
sandr325
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Wedding Gifts
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Courtz
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Re: Wedding Gifts
My wedding is $150 a head so $300 from a couple is 'no profit' They aren't paying for you but I would send at least half of what you'd give if you went since they did give you a gift and attend your wedding. I have received lots of 'no's' for my wedding and the gifts have actually been very generous and most probably sent the same as if they had attended. For those who would have traveled it would have cost them even more then the gift so I guess they felt they'd give the same gift, so you should also consider that you now don't need to travel. Also, it depends on the type of friend you guys are.
Soon2BeMrsMango
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Wedding Gifts
I would probably reciprocate the same gift I was given if it was a good friend.
Pinkisles
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Wedding Gifts
I got several no's with a check ranging from $150-$203.15 (my uncle has always done that w/ checks writing some random amount lol). I would say that range is acceptable and any gift is better than nothing IMO.
I got a few 'no's' from close family and friends and they sent nothing and said nothing, just mailed the no back. That really got me peeved.
cupcake8503
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Wedding Gifts
Personally I would reciprocate the gift, especially since you would give that amount including paying for your travel fees if you were to attend. Of course, there is no obligation and it is a personal choice. I am sure they will be grateful regardless.
Bride2Be78
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Wedding Gifts
I think it depends on the relationship. Give what you feel comfortable giving. We had a few no's and maybe only 2 sent a check. We also had 3 non-gifters at our wedding. A wedding isn't about expecting a payout. Its about sharing a special day with the people you love. Yes, it nice if you receive a gift but some people are not in the financial position to give a nice gift. Just my two sense.
