We went to Fh's cousin's black tie wedding down in DC in september. We had to spend money to get there, for attire, to stay 2 nights in the hotel, etc and we gave a pretty generous gift, especially since they're older and more well established and we're broke. 3 months later we get the thank you...it took 3 months and there's not even a photo and it says 'Sorry this note took so long, we were busy enjoying newlywed life.thanks for your generous gift, we're going to use it as spending money for our honeymoon in (list of like 5 islands'
They went to like hawaii or somethgn right after the wedding, but that was just a 'mini-moon' to them
I don't know why it pissed me off, and it probably shouldn't, but it did.
MrsP2Be
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Re: Wedding Thank you..would this piss you off?
I have to do the same travel thing for my cousin's wedding next spring (to NC) and I'm going to give a present, not cash. They chose to get married outside of NY and they will now get a traditional southern wedding present.
BRod-Cheng
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Re: Wedding Thank you..would this piss you off?
I think you are reading too much into it - they thanked you and showed their appreciation. I'm not sure what else you wanted them to write. They even acknowledged that your gift was generous.
marymoon
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Re: Wedding Thank you..would this piss you off?
According to etiquette, you are supposed to write what ou intend to use it for, but to say it's spending money for your trip to 4 different islands..that's ridic. Just lie about it..say you're gonna buy china..lol...
And I'm bitching that it took 3 months because it wasn't even a picture. If it was a photo, I can totally understand, you have to wait for the proofs, then pick it, then wait for it come on, but it was a note card...come on!!
cjb88
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Re: Wedding Thank you..would this piss you off?
why is it bad to use some wedding money as spending money on the hm???
ssdbk
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Re: Wedding Thank you..would this piss you off?
I think what they wrote is fine, maybe a bit pretentious to write a list of places they are visiting, but not terrible. And I don't think it implies that your gift was low at all. Vacation spending money can often be just as much as the trip, and they even implied that your gift would last as spending money for more than one island.
klingklang77
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Re: Wedding Thank you..would this piss you off?
Posted by BKtoLI
Maybe when they come to your wedding, you can write in their thank you card 'Thank you for your generous gift, we're going to be using it for all of those S&M sex toys that FH and I wanted to get!!'
yes, three months is a little long for a thank you without a photo.
Joyous1995
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Re: Wedding Thank you..would this piss you off?
Posted by klingklang77
Posted by BKtoLI
Maybe when they come to your wedding, you can write in their thank you card 'Thank you for your generous gift, we're going to be using it for all of those S&M sex toys that FH and I wanted to get!!'
yes, three months is a little long for a thank you without a photo.
I would be bothered but do you think we are just being haters. I know that a part of me would be jealous.
kmkelly
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Re: Wedding Thank you..would this piss you off?
Whatever, some people are what they are. Don't let it get to you. Forget it!
Forcus on the good stuff!
SIBride06
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Re: Wedding Thank you..would this piss you off?
That would annoy me at first, btu then I dont think that I would care too much. At least they wrote a thank you note, and it wasn't something generic like the one I received last night from my cousin. It was a pre-written card with there photo. They just signed their names on it & mailed it out
JessicaM.
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Re: Wedding Thank you..would this piss you off?
no, this wouldn't really bother me. they are saying what they used it on...not everyone needs the gifts to buy homes and such. they needed play money and that's what they used it for, but that's just me.
BEANS
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Re: Wedding Thank you..would this piss you off?
My MOH actually went to a wedding OOT for a friend she has known for 20 years. The thank you looked the cards that you send when someone comes to a funeral. It had no picture & they wrote on the inside with a sharpe marker. She was so insulted.
Kiddo115
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Re: Wedding Thank you..would this piss you off?
I would be insulted as well..
FH and I were in our best friends wedding in Arizona. We got a pre-printed thankyou card from them a month later, with the same message going out to ALL the guests of the wedding. Did everyone trek across the country to attend their special day? I don't think so.. a little note would've been nice
And to top it all off.. they didn't even sign them! They were printed 'Mr. and Mrs. James So and So'...We haven't called him James since kindergarten!
ChrissynRicky
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Re: Wedding Thank you..would this piss you off?
I wouldn't be insulted. Three months is actually the 'average' for a Thank You. People do get busy and you can't blame them or know what they are actually up to unless you were them.
A thank you eventually is better than no thank you at all.
As far as what they're spending it on - they were honest and it's their choice. If you give a monetary gift, it's up to the couple to use it on whatever they want....if you want to have some control of what they use it for - you can give them a gift certificate or something off their registry.
