What do you consider 'cheating'

---

Posted by Espo22

---

Posted by wifetobe

I feel that anytime you have a connection with someone other then your spouce..it's cheating. If you confide in another that is also cheating to me.

Im harsh but I just can't stand the thought of FH talking and confiding in another woman!!! Emotional cheating is just as bad..if not worse than physical cheating.

---

well dont we all do that? we all confide in another

---

i agree here, you can have connections with people besides your spouse and it isnt 'cheating' in my book

---

Posted by JeanetteandSteve

any kind of physical relationship/intimacy is absolutely cheating.

but...the emotional part is tough b/c there's friends and then there's something more and sometimes it might be hard to figure out where to draw the line. i have a male friend who i was VERY close with...and sometimes i used to feel bad about how much we talked and how close we were b/c i felt like i shouldn't be that close to another man. so i took a break from talking to him for a while. we started talking again recently but much less often and i told him we can't be close like that anymore. he understands and i feel much better. FH never even really complained about it, but i felt like it would make me uncomfortable if FH was THAT close to another girl where he wanted to talk to her every day and they called each other 'best friends' and acted like they were in their own little world when they hung out. that's way too much when you're married/engaged...even when you're just dating.

i think it's up to the couple when it comes to the emotional relationship w the opposite sex. if you feel like it's crossing a line, then it is and you shouldn't go there. if you don't feel that there is anything wrong then there isn't. and you have to respect how your husband/wife feels about it too. if they feel there should be a more strict boundary then you do, you should draw the line to meet their comfort level.

---

I agree. I would not mind if FH had friends. But if he had a friend that he went to with his problems and confided in instead of me, I would feel very weird about it. I would feel like, why does he need her, when I am supposed to be his BF?

---

well new people is understandable but even if one of his old female friends were single you dont always have to feel like it will lead to something else. He loves you and you know whether or not you can trust him, you dont have to always feel like that. As much as they should be respectful to us and vice versa we also need to give them the respect of trusting them. When there is need for suspicion then that is different.

Sorry, just saying ONLY bc this was done to me in the past and i know what it was like. My ex would get mad if i even said Hi to a guy i know since we were kids. I never did anything for him to be like that, and always respected him so to not be trusted without any good reason can take away creditability. Not towards what you said but just saying this part in the thread in general

---

This also happened to me, and I was totally innocent. My ex was just a total jealous insecure freak. I will never stop FH from meeting new ppl (man or woman) and being friendly to them. His personality shouldn't be altered just because i came into his life, but as a woman, we have this sixth sense when we know if things are just platonic or if there's something suspicious. I always trust my gut! FH has lots of female friends and co-workers, and I adore them, as they adore me. He's also made new friends and we all somehow became friends as well. That's how it should be..if a friend of the opposite sex is that important to you, then they should also be apart of your future spouse's life.

If however, I notice that my fh starts acting out of character and is trying to hide things from me while hanging out with friends of the 'opposite' sex...of course it will have me thinking.

anything physical...
as far as going on a date goes....if its just friends going out to dinner or something fine! but if hes going on an actual date with someone id kick his ***

i have lots of guy friends and we go out to dinner and stuff Steve has to deal with it....and he does he doesnt have a problem with me hyanging out with them but if he felt something was going on ....he would say something

---

Posted by GinaZ

---

Posted by JulyBride728

all of the above I consider cheating. Anything a mate does behind your back with intentions of covering it up is considered grounds for serious mistrust...especially when it comes to him and the opposite sex.

---

I agree!

---

Ditto I agree with this too.

anything that makes you even QUESTION or want to NEGOTIATE if this constitutes as cheating would be a no-no in my book.

---

Posted by autumnbride10

---

Posted by JeanetteandSteve

any kind of physical relationship/intimacy is absolutely cheating.

but...the emotional part is tough b/c there's friends and then there's something more and sometimes it might be hard to figure out where to draw the line. i have a male friend who i was VERY close with...and sometimes i used to feel bad about how much we talked and how close we were b/c i felt like i shouldn't be that close to another man. so i took a break from talking to him for a while. we started talking again recently but much less often and i told him we can't be close like that anymore. he understands and i feel much better. FH never even really complained about it, but i felt like it would make me uncomfortable if FH was THAT close to another girl where he wanted to talk to her every day and they called each other 'best friends' and acted like they were in their own little world when they hung out. that's way too much when you're married/engaged...even when you're just dating.

i think it's up to the couple when it comes to the emotional relationship w the opposite sex. if you feel like it's crossing a line, then it is and you shouldn't go there. if you don't feel that there is anything wrong then there isn't. and you have to respect how your husband/wife feels about it too. if they feel there should be a more strict boundary then you do, you should draw the line to meet their comfort level.

---

I agree. I would not mind if FH had friends. But if he had a friend that he went to with his problems and confided in instead of me, I would feel very weird about it. I would feel like, why does he need her, when I am supposed to be his BF?

---

what if they need to complain about us though jk

---

Posted by wifetobe

I feel that anytime you have a connection with someone other then your spouce..it's cheating. If you confide in another that is also cheating to me.

Im harsh but I just can't stand the thought of FH talking and confiding in another woman!!! Emotional cheating is just as bad..if not worse than physical cheating.

---

agreed 100%

innocent flirting no (i mean a smile or a look, very innocent)

anything physical of course

emotional, well you figure DH knows it all, but there is nothing wrong with having close male friends to trust.

It's kind of hard to explain..of course kissing, sex etc is cheating..but when it comes to emotional...if FH is having any sort of feelings towards her, that should be for ME, then its cheating. There's really no way to tell, except for trusting that your significant other would have enough respect for you not to do anything to hurt you. I mean really, how you can tell what kind of feelings your FH truly has for someone?? It all comes down to trust.

I have a lot of male friends that I confide in, and that FH is friendly with, and there's not even a ounce of me that is interested in any sort of relationship with them. In fact, I help them with relationship problems and everything...I def think males and females can be friends and it can never lead to anything, but if theres any question, it def. needs to be discussed..

As far as FH meeting any single girl at a bar, online or anywhere..of course thats a HUGE no, i mean c'mon...why would they even start a convo and feel the need to exchange numbers and become 'friends'..and an even bigger red flag would be if he said he didn't have a girlfriend, thats lying, which gives you good enough reason to stop trusting the guy..