what have you learned...how have you grown as a person?

As I round the two week mark I started thinking about what I have learned from the process.
Just wondering what life lessons and skills other brides have gained from the planning experience.Has it helped you to mature? Made you more confident or capable?

Re: what have you learned...how have you grown as a person?

Pre-cana helped me learn alot. it reminded me that to have a successful relationship you must be unified but not live in each others shadow. FH and I have our own lives and we go out and do things without eachother more often. but we miss each other and when we get back together after doing our seperate things...we're excited and passionate towards each other. it def rekindled that passion.

I've learned to communicate even better than I did before.

and i dunno if i could say i 'learned' this because i tried to live by this the whole time but...remember that its the marriage thats important and not so much the wedding. the wedding is just a tiny speck of the bigger picture and yeah we all want a nice wedding...but in the end we just need to focus on our future hubbies and the commitment we are making and if we focus on that and make that a priority ...the rest of the details will fall into place so don't worry.

Re: what have you learned...how have you grown as a person?

thanks for the sincere answer!
Good luck at the wedding!

Re: what have you learned...how have you grown as a person?

i really have learned that you can do EVERYTHING to make people happy and if you do it to be better and bigger then anyone else people do not appreciate your efforts. But if you do it out of love and true pride people respect and cherish all your efforts.

After the wedding, realize nothing will change about your relationship with your dh. I mean little things might but in all honestly your both the same people as before you put those rings on. The flaws all stay the same the best parts are still there so don't count on this being that great of a moment where people decide I AM GOING TO CHANGE, because it doesn't happen. DH knew this beforehand because of a few friends that got married and are on the verge of divorce because they thought one of the other would change. Never happens! Even with a kid typically doesn't happen.

Re: what have you learned...how have you grown as a person?

people are always going to talk sh!t and make comparisons i have learned to ignore them you will not satisfy 100% of your guests many people will like to take control of you and your planning again this is where the mute button comes in

i always use to consume myself with what everyone thinks of me, my decisions, if I was too rude when I spoke up -dh has taught me not too care so much and let it go you can be the nicest person in the world or you could have been so accomodating people still will find a way to complain

hth

Re: what have you learned...how have you grown as a person?

So far I have learned that a big project consists of a lot of small steps, and to keep getting things done, even when it seems like there is an impossible amount to do.
I've learned that people will surprise you, in both good and bad ways, and that we may not know everyone in our lives as well as we think we do.
I would like to think that I have learned not to take things so personally, but I'm still trying to get there!

Re: what have you learned...how have you grown as a person?

Everyone talks about how expensive weddings are. And yes we could have used the money to buy a house or something else. BUt we learned to budget and to really figure out what's important, what's worth the money etc.... We learned a lot about managing money. We've learned a lot of compromise. And we learned to stop listening to others and to grow up and make our own decisions.

Re: what have you learned...how have you grown as a person?

I learned that what color shoes somewhere wheres or how they put their hair, or what a family member wears to my wedding, it isn't important to me. I just care that the people I love are there to share in my day, I care that those same people are happy to be there to share in our day and I want everyone to have to a good time and be comfortable and most of all, be who they are. If they want to dance with no shoes, do it! If they are heavy and want to take off their jacket to dance, do it! Although I think age and maturity have taught me this lesson and not necessarily wedding planning, but life is just toooo short to worry about the little things.

Re: what have you learned...how have you grown as a person?

I learned sooooo much....I wouldn't even know where to start LOL....I guess I will just say that I learned how to take things more in stride (I think) where other people are concerned...FH and I have weathered a lot of disappointment during this process and learned a lot about people we thought we knew and didn't...we accepted it and moved on. In the end it really is about you and FH and your commitment to each other. The wedding is one day in what hopefully will be a lifetime of days with each other.

Great post BTW

Re: what have you learned...how have you grown as a person?

I've learned that some people have issues that have nothing to do with me and I have to have a thicker skin.

I've learned that FH will defend me and he'll do whatever's in his power to make things work.

I've learned that FH is not the only one that had to grow up a little.

I've learned that getting engaged can practically destroy a good friendship if the friend feels really jealous and hurt that she hasn't found the one.

Re: what have you learned...how have you grown as a person?

I have learned that people you care about don't seem to care about you as much and it's time to move on from these relationships. Why give my all when they aren't?

Re: what have you learned...how have you grown as a person?

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Posted by Mici n KC

I have learned that people you care about don't seem to care about you as much and it's time to move on from these relationships. Why give my all when they aren't?

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this is really sad but true

the friend I mentioned above in my post is about to be part of the past. sometimes you have to move on

Re: what have you learned...how have you grown as a person?

very interesting....It helps to hear about these common experiences!

Re: what have you learned...how have you grown as a person?

It's kinda slow...so I bumped this thread. I think the responses were very heartfelt.

Re: what have you learned...how have you grown as a person?

i have learned that my husband dave would do anything to make me happy & that i would do anything and everything within my power to make him happy as well.

i learned which people in my life i could count on more than others.

i learned that if it were not for this website - i would not have had half the wedding that we did.

i also know that i would not have met people who have changed my life for the better, if it were not this website.

Re: what have you learned...how have you grown as a person?

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Posted by davenjess

i have learned that my husband dave would do anything to make me happy & that i would do anything and everything within my power to make him happy as well.

i learned which people in my life i could count on more than others.

i learned that if it were not for this website - i would not have had half the wedding that we did.

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Me too -- this site SAVED me
but I have to say because of it I also spent more on my wedding than I would have! So many great ideas!!!!

The idea for my invites came from here and I spent an arm and a leg on them but I've received so many compliments on them that I don't care anymore. I heart LIW.

Re: what have you learned...how have you grown as a person?

Financially more responsible.

Re: what have you learned...how have you grown as a person?

so far, I think I have learned more about my FH than me. I have learned that he doesn't really care about somethings as much as he says he does - and for the most part, this was good for me - there were things he said he would never do years ago in relation to a wedding, and things that he said 2 months ago that he wouldn't do - and he is either now doing these things or is close to doing them. so, i think I may have learned one of two things:

1 - he is fickle
or
2 - he wants (more than I may have thought) to make me happy when it comes to the wedding.

and this of course translates to the rest of our lives (re: making me happy). there's nothing that he WAS against that he's now not considering or already said yes to - and we're not talking money here, we're talking elements of the ceremony, etc. And this says a lot about our relationship I think.

Re: what have you learned...how have you grown as a person?

What I have learned as a person is that I am an extremely indecisive person. I found through this planning process that I am horrible about making decisions and constantly second guess myself. I am trying to work at that! And how I've grown is probably learning how to have more patience and to not expect a lot from people.

Re: what have you learned...how have you grown as a person?

I learned who is really important in my life.
There's nothing like a wedding to bring out people's true colors - both good and bad.

I learned that someone people care about me more than I knew, and that others really only care about themselves, a pretty dress, and having some random date on their arm.

I also learned that we have parties to attend our entire lives, the wedding is just another one on that list, and it's the marriage that's important. I don't care about the pictures, the video, what songs were or weren't played, I don't care that I didn't have a ton of those little touches that others did - half way through I realized those things would never matter to me and focused on what did - him and I :)